Time off for Funerals???

[ChristineN, BSN, RN]

So I got an e-mail from a co-worker today asking me if I would be able to work for her so she can attend her in-laws funeral. I found the whole concept strange, as everywhere else I have ever worked if a relative (by blood or by marriage) died, you could either use FMLA or you were automatically granted 3 days off as some sort of "grieving days." Has anyone ever heard of staff having to find their own replacements in order to attend funerals???

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

Now a days....sadly...yes. Many facilities allow for immediate family only and in laws don't count. To apply for FLMA for 3 days seems excessive to me, by the time the aper work is filled out and approved.....the funeral is over. Manyt places now a days say....you want it off? get coverage......it's just heartless.

[NoseInABook]

That is a workplace I would leave as soon as possible. They have no respect for employees and unreasonable expectations.

[netglow, ASN, RN]

Yes, it's hard. Since the late 80's, around here I guess unless you work for a small place, it's been only 1st relation. Spouse, child, mom, dad, sister, brother. That's it. I have a cousin in TX who I fear is ending her forever fight with cancer. I am already feeling my heart beat all the faster with the anxiety.

[ChristineN, BSN, RN]

Wow, maybe I just worked for good companies/managers before but I almost wondered if she was trying to pull a fast one as I could never dream of finding my own replacement for a funeral. My family lives 500 miles away so if anything were to happen to them I would be driving/flying home and asking questions later.

[sharpeimom]

several years ago, a beloved aunt died and her funeral was scheduled for monday. i told my manager that i would need to take that day off as one of my three "personal" days allotted per year. that was

thursday morning. she said if i took the day off, i didn't need to bother coming to work tuesday night for my next scheduled shift. i repeated what she had said and she verified it.

i went to the funeral as scheduled. since i had been told i would no longer have a job if i went, i stayed home tuesday night. about an hour into the shift, the phone rang. my manager wanted to know

where the $%&& i was. when i repeated what she'd said, she replied that she hadn't meant it and i just should have known it. guess which one of us still had a job by the end of the year??

[Double-Helix, BSN, RN]

Our policy for days off for greiving only includes immediate family- spouse, children, siblings and parents. Other than that, you can use PTO to take the time off ot find someone to switch a shift.

Some facilities don't offer automatic time off for death of a family member at all. It's up to the employee to find someone to cover the shifts.

[StrwbryblndRN]

If I needed a day/or two off for grieving I would take it without worrying about a replacement.

Granting just for immediate family is silly. (Some companies say that immediate family is defined by the individual. ex: Best friend is closer family than parent)

I agree that using PTO makes sense but not necessarily to finding your own replacement.

If my spouse, kids or even my mother passed it would be greater than 2-3 days off I would need to grieve and/or settle things. I would be a basket case and need to take some time off.

[AngelicDarkness]

Sadly, my facility is the same way. My co-workers husband's grandmother died, and they had to find someone to cover their shifts because it isn't immediate family. I worked for her. Who knows, in the future I may need the shift coverage?:)

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

Our policy for days off for greiving only includes immediate family- spouse, children, siblings and parents. Other than that, you can use PTO to take the time off ot find someone to switch a shift.

Out of curiosity, how much time is given for a spouse or children?

ETA: The reason I ask is that at my old company (non healthcare), the managers had an unwritten rule to give as much time "as needed." One of my coworkers took a month off after her husband died suddenly. He died at his own father's funeral.

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

Back in the mid 80s, I worked somewhere that asked the employee to bring in a COPY OF THE NEWSPAPER OBITUARY in order to get funeral time...... I thought that was so inexcusable..... JMHO

[ChristineN, BSN, RN]

Back in the mid 80s, I worked somewhere that asked the employee to bring in a COPY OF THE NEWSPAPER OBITUARY in order to get funeral time...... I thought that was so inexcusable..... JMHO

Um wow. Yes Someday I'll be busy flying home, planning a funeral, helping take care of my parents estate, and oh right forgot to mail my employer the obit to prove this is for real. Unreal.