The thing about 12 hour shifts...vent

Nurses General Nursing

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You all know! They are exhausting. My mother in law is really going to make me snap one of these days. I am trying, realllllyy trying to be kind. She said I was lazy and should pick up another job since I barely work at all, only 3 days a week. She doesn't understand why I do not like company on my first day off after doing 3 in a row. This is a stay at home mom who has never held a job in her life, not even scooping ice cream in high school. Anyway. Just thought I would vent. I am not lazy. I work hard. I need a day to recover after working 3 in a row. Ugh.

Specializes in Ambulatory Care, Case Manager.

Does she live with you? Or she wants to come for a visit on your day off?

Specializes in Mental Health, Medical Research, Periop.

OMG! My mother in law just made a comment yesterday during Easter dinner, something like - "she makes all this money and only works 3 days of the week and shes off the rest of the week." ummm.... lets see thats 36hrs in 3days!!!!! I mean really! GEEZ! I know how you feel. People really underestimate a nurses job!!

Specializes in New PACU RN.

How does she have the nerve to say that when you say she doesn't work? How is it any business of hers?

Does she live with you?

If she doesn't, ignore her calls until she gets the hint.

You have a lot more grace than I have. I would be looking for blood if my own mother said that, nevermind a mother-in-law. :rolleyes:

The 3 12's a week schedule has it's advantages, i.e. 4 days off, but you do lose the first one for recovery. Sorry that your MlL is such a bear! Maybe your spouse can run interference with their lovely family member.

Specializes in ICU, Cardiac.

Some people are just toxic.......and don't get that 36 hours a week is a full time job......

It is her normal behavior towards you?

I've never done any job as exhausting as floor nursing. It drains you physically and mentally.

Consider the source, and you're welcome to vent about your MIL. She might never "get it".

Does she live with you? Or she wants to come for a visit on your day off?

She likes to barge in unannounced. I used to work nights and she kept waking me up. I finally had to disconnect the door bell and unplug all the phones and ignore her banging on the door. I had several conversations with her about it as did my husband but she just does what she wants. No point in letting her in she will just critisize my housekeeping and complain that there is no supper cooking. lol.

She is a dreadful woman, thankfully her sons all turned out lovely. She does have a daughter just like her. :eek:

My sister in laws all just let her barge in and complain, none of them will tell her to take a hike. She keeps them all in a state of stress and anxiety when she drops in, and it gets 100 times worse with children. She of course is a perfect parent and no one else can compete. When we have children, we are moving to the opposite coast.

You all know! They are exhausting. My mother in law is really going to make me snap one of these days. I am trying, realllllyy trying to be kind. She said I was lazy and should pick up another job since I barely work at all, only 3 days a week. She doesn't understand why I do not like company on my first day off after doing 3 in a row. This is a stay at home mom who has never held a job in her life, not even scooping ice cream in high school. Anyway. Just thought I would vent. I am not lazy. I work hard. I need a day to recover after working 3 in a row. Ugh.

Does she realize that you work x amount of hours in JUST 3 days plus meetings and clinical updates, etc. Ask her if she gets to eat, pee,drink etc. when she wants throughout the day---if she says yes-tell her that you are on your feet ALL day and the freedom of those 3 things is dictated by your patients, nurse manager, and co-workers. She is clueless IMO.

Specializes in Home Care.

Oh wow, she sounds absolutely dreadful. Can't you move sooner?

I'd take my husband and move far, far, away and not give her my phone number. She's bad news and sounds like she thrives on creating family drama. *****

Specializes in family practice.

I feel for you cos i cant imagine someone doing this to me. I would have told her in so many words that she is not invited no matter what. Thats why now i and my spouse are looking to move together, i am not staying near any family member.

And why does she just barge in unannounced. Did u guys let this happen and now its gotten out of hand?

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

With a smile on your face, invite her to come to work with you - it should be a breeze, since it's 'only' 3 days a week. Invite her to run interference with patients, family, doctors, social work, dietary, lab, and pharmacy, all the while tending to 5, 6, or 9 barfing, bleeding, pooping, disoriented, hurting, crashing patients.

Grrr. This kind of stuff I have no tolerance for. I get the 'wow, you only work two weekend nights, you have the whole week off to stay home', which is true. But I work my ass off those weekend nights (Fridays are always baby-popping day on my unit) and spend the first day bouncing back. If they are really obnoxious about it, I go into detail about how we dig melon-sized clots out of hemorrhaging people and how we admit 14 babies in 12 hours and how we code sick babies and how we hold 19-weekers born alive until they finally breathe their last. Most non-nurse people get strangely quiet after that....

My MIL is deceased and I never got to meet her, but I am sorry for the toxic one you have, OP.

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