I was walking through the hallway today and a family member of one of our patient's was talking on their cellphone-- apparently giving an update to someone about the patient. This is what I hear: "Well, no, he's not very awake today. I think they seduced him while they did a procedure."
If I had milk in my mouth at the time, it would have come out my nose!
We do a lot of things in the ICU, but seducing is not one of them!
OK, now it's your turn! What crazy things have you heard?
doing a patients admission once, she was one patient we had seen before on our unit.
Patient: Last time I came I couldn't remember what medications I was on there are so many so I just brought them with me.
Me: That's great. Can I see them so we can go over them together?
Patient: Oh sure dear. they are in my bag, if you would get them for me.
I go get them...and pull out a few bottles we go over, so open one of the bottles that looked a little odd to me because there were a bunch of pills that did not match. Some small, some large, some enteric coated, some cut in half, some white, some green etc.
Me: "These pills are not labeled. what do you take these for?
Patient: "Oh those are my leftover antibiotics throughout the years. I take a couple when I'm not feeling good"
Specializes in Float Pool-Med-Surg, Telemetry, IMCU.
When asking about the colonoscopy prep "So, like when I get that enema tomorrow will it like turn me gay?" Yes, sir I'm afraid so...
Really??!! Really?? Wow... How on earth did you answer that, TheMoonIsMyLantern?
And to the poster named mmm Cdiff....love the name; I have a friend who was oddly enthusiastic about smelling her first Cdiff poo during nursing school. Yeah, I know that's gross. She was also super psyched about maggot debridement. **shudder**
Specializes in Med nurse in med-surg., float, HH, and PDN.
nrsang97- You know, maybe that patient's daughter had a point.....maybe you DO have to be "totally conscious" in order to poop..........maybe that's why so many people are constipated?
When asking about the colonoscopy prep "So, like when I get that enema tomorrow will it like turn me gay?" Yes, sir I'm afraid so...
Really??!! Really?? Wow... How on earth did you answer that, TheMoonIsMyLantern?
Oh yes. That happened to me right out of nursing school, I was so new and green and incredibly by the book that I couldn't think of a good response so I just did the awkward little girl fake laugh and said something along the lines of "No sir, spontaneous homosexuality is not an adverse effect of enemas.". I just wish someone would ask me that now, I'd sure give them a good scare!
Oh yes. That happened to me right out of nursing school, I was so new and green and incredibly by the book that I couldn't think of a good response so I just did the awkward little girl fake laugh and said something along the lines of "No sir, spontaneous homosexuality is not an adverse effect of enemas.". I just wish someone would ask me that now, I'd sure give them a good scare!
Jenni811, RN
1,032 Posts
doing a patients admission once, she was one patient we had seen before on our unit.
Patient: Last time I came I couldn't remember what medications I was on there are so many so I just brought them with me.
Me: That's great. Can I see them so we can go over them together?
Patient: Oh sure dear. they are in my bag, if you would get them for me.
I go get them...and pull out a few bottles we go over, so open one of the bottles that looked a little odd to me because there were a bunch of pills that did not match. Some small, some large, some enteric coated, some cut in half, some white, some green etc.
Me: "These pills are not labeled. what do you take these for?
Patient: "Oh those are my leftover antibiotics throughout the years. I take a couple when I'm not feeling good"