Frustrated with angry, demeaning doctors

[NurseyNursington]

I'm on my second week of orientation on a very busy Med-Surg floor. My preceptor is great, and I'm catching on to the ancient charting system and learning through a lot of "by the way" conversations.

My main concern, and what literally keeps me from sleeping, is calling the doctors during my shifts. I literally have panic attacks just thinking about it. It's not because I'm unsure of myself or I lack confidence in my assessments, it's because every doctor I've encountered at this hospital is an enormous jerk. I work the night shift, so I try to call early if a problem arises and not wait until 2am and wake them up. However, it seems like the same rotation of doctors, whom my patients have as their providers, are just plain rude on the phone.

For example, last week I called a doctor because my patient was having severe heart burn, and didn't have an order for anything to solve the problem. I called the doctor, having my ducks in a row before and knowing her vitals and assessment, and he actually "huffed" at me over the phone, shouted to make her NPO and then hung up on me. He did this again the following day for another patient when I was giving him critical lab values for a H&H. A few times my preceptor has called doctors for me, since I'm not 100% up to speed, and they've yelled at her too. I just feel like I can't win.

I'm not super thick skinned, like a lot of the nurses. While a mean doctor would never stop me from calling when it's really necessary, I just have so much anxiety and frustration surrounding it. I've yet to meet a nice doctor here, and even a urologist was on our floor throwing things around because he couldn't find something. I just don't know what to do. It's literally making me question my want to be a nurse if all I do is get yelled at by doctors. What kind of career is that? Words or wisdom... anything?

[meanmaryjean, DNP, RN]

A) They are just voices on the phone and cannot hurt you (think 'thunder')

B) They work for the patient, not the other way 'round.

[mindofmidwifery, ADN]

I second meanmaryjane. I've worked at an answering service where I have had to call on call doctors and yes they were rude but it was my job. Don't let them get to you and don't let them get in the way of your job. Also, they aren't being rude because they know it's you calling, they have a very stressful job as well and if you think about that, it should help! Maybe my experience doesn't add up to a nurses experience but there's my two cents ? it's funny though because you would think the radiologists would be meaner than cardiologists, pediatricians, or otolaryngologists, but they were the nicest which helped me because our radiology line was of the utmost importance. I'm done now, but good luck and keep your head up!!!

[scaredsilly, BSN, RN]

Do you get to see the docs when they round? I try to anticipate as much as I can. Look at the meds, if a side effect is gastro disturbance or headache, or whatever, ask for an order for 'just in case' so that you don't have to disturb them for med orders. Obviously we can't anticipate everything, but it cuts down on the calls a lot. Start every call with "I'm sorry to disturb you but..." and then as long as your ducks are in a row, you have done all you can. If they get rude anyway-just assume that is their nasty personality and shrug it off.

[NurseyNursington]

I wish I would be able to see the doctors when they round, because your suggestion, scaredsilly, about asking for PRN's is the first thing I would do. However, most of the doctors don't round each day and if they do, it's way after I'm already gone. One of my patients, who has been there for over a month, said she's seen her doctor a total of 3 times. I thought she was exaggeration, so I looked at her chart. Either he rounds and doesn't chart it, or the patient is completely correct.

I do try to keep in mind that the doctors have incredibly hard jobs. I would never want to be in their shoes. I'd like to think I'd be nicer though when it's something that's obviously in the best interest of the patient. I guess I just need a pep talk. Being a new nurse is way harder than I thought, and getting yelled at when you're trying to do the right thing makes it that much more difficult.

Something I do take pride in, is that I haven't cried once. I'm a crier... and even though I'm anxious I promised myself I wouldn't let a doctor put me in that place.

[RN403, BSN, RN]

I can empathize with you as a new nurse. I have been in a situation where a physician pretty much laughed it up on the phone as I was simply following protocol and alerted them to an issue at hand that I suppose they found less than important. At the end of the day I did my job, charted the conversation, and had the peace of mind of knowing that I advocated for my patient. The physician obviously had a grand old time as well during our conversation so I took it as a win - win.

A thick skin is much needed in this line of work. I have also found that focusing on the positive in each situation goes a long way as well. Whether you get yelled at, laughed at, or even when they sound annoyed...always know that the call you made was in the best interest of your patient. Always look at the positive and throw the negative behind you and you will more than likely feel much better. From one newbie to another...best wishes! As another poster said...physicians are just another voice over the phone...they are just other human beings.

[gassy2be]

I would ask around and see if they are like this with all the nurses. If they are, brush it off. As long as you get the orders you need, who cares? No need to be buddy buddy with the docs anyway.

If they aren't like that with other nurses, I would review how you speak with the docs and listen in to other nurses' phone conversations (try conferencing in on the phone, that helped me). Good luck!

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

This issue needs to be discussed with OP's manager. Disruptive physician behavior has been found to have a significant negative effect on patient care quality & safety. Every accredited hospital must have a formal policy that addresses this problem. OP needs to review that policy & follow it to the letter.

Disrespect is NOT OK for any member of the health care team... physicians don't get a 'pass'. Take the same appropriate actions you would if anyone was throwing a hissy fit. It may be wise to make sure you have a like-minded co-worker listening in when you have to call one of these bozos... to avoid the physician simply denying bad behavior.

[PMFB-RN, RN]

Oh how I wish I could work on your unit for a few nights and make all the doctor calls for the whole unit! Dealing with those kinds of doctors is my specialty.

The short answer if that a) there is no excuse for them to behave that way to nurses, EVER! and b) they get away with it because the nurses and management let them.

First stop tolerating it. When a doctor speaks unprofessionally to you on the phone interrupt them in mid sentence by saying something like "you may not speak to me in such a rude and condescending manner. I am hanging up the phone now, please call me back to address the patients needs as soon as you can speak civilly" and hang up the phone. Don't worry if he is in med sentence, don't worry if he doesn't shut up so you can speak. Just keep speaking over the top of him. Get a co-worker to listed to your side of the discussion to witness that YOU were not rude or unprofessional.

I wait 10 minuets for them to call back. If no call I call their boss, the chief resident in the case of residents, the chief of the service if they are staff docs, or even the chief of staff. Trust me if those guys are getting woken up in the middle of the night because their underlings are refusing to address patient concerns things will change.

Encourage all your fellow nurses to do the same.

[PMFB-RN, RN]

I would ask around and see if they are like this with all the nurses. If they are, brush it off. As long as you get the orders you need, who cares? No need to be buddy buddy with the docs anyway.

This is exactly the attitude that perpetuates such behavior! Rude providers has been shown to result in poorer patient outcomes. Time to put your grown up pants on and behave like a professional.

[gassy2be]

This is exactly the attitude that perpetuates such behavior! Rude providers has been shown to result in poorer patient outcomes. Time to put your grown up pants on and behave like a professional.

Yelling is one thing, just being rude is another. A lot of doctors are rude, a lot of nurses are rude, a lot of pharmacists are rude, etc. I think rudeness can just be tolerated. Yelling shouldn't be. I just don't think there's any reason to make a huge deal over rude doctors, you'll likely get laughed at. Just be the bigger person and kill them with kindness. We all have to deal with rude people. If we were to report all rude coworkers, we would be writing people up once a shift. It's just not realistic. Additionally, I'm not sure if you were telling me to grow up, but if you were, you're just as bad as those docs.

[PMFB-RN, RN]

Yelling is one thing, just being rude is another. A lot of doctors are rude, a lot of nurses are rude, a lot of pharmacists are rude, etc. I think rudeness can just be tolerated.

Wow! I can't believe you are willing to tolerate such behavior. I am not. Of course making allowances for the rare instance from a person having a bad day, other than that no way am I putting up with it. Neither does my employer.

Yelling shouldn't be. I just don't think there's any reason to make a huge deal over rude doctors, you'll likely get laughed at.

J

I don't get laughed at. I get my point across and deal with rude, unprofessional behavior. No need to make a huge deal over anything. Just deal with it as it occurs, thus preventing any huge deals. I expect civil and professional behavior from everyone I work with. I don't tolerate less. In my career I have observed patients have bad outcomes because a timid nurse didn't want to face rude and condescending behavior from a physician and didn't make the call she should have. Besides life in too short to spend my working life being treated like that.

We all have to deal with rude people.

It doesn't sound like you are advocating dealing with anything.

If we were to report all rude coworkers, we would be writing people up once a shift. It's just not realistic.

I don't usually write people up, and never for rude behavior. I don't have to deal with rude people every shift and feel sorry for you and others who do.

Additionally, I'm not sure if you were telling me to grow up, but if you were, you're just as bad as those docs.

I was saying that all of us need to deal with these situations, not speaking to you in particular.