I'm on my second week of orientation on a very busy Med-Surg floor. My preceptor is great, and I'm catching on to the ancient charting system and learning through a lot of "by the way" conversations.
My main concern, and what literally keeps me from sleeping, is calling the doctors during my shifts. I literally have panic attacks just thinking about it. It's not because I'm unsure of myself or I lack confidence in my assessments, it's because every doctor I've encountered at this hospital is an enormous jerk. I work the night shift, so I try to call early if a problem arises and not wait until 2am and wake them up. However, it seems like the same rotation of doctors, whom my patients have as their providers, are just plain rude on the phone.
For example, last week I called a doctor because my patient was having severe heart burn, and didn't have an order for anything to solve the problem. I called the doctor, having my ducks in a row before and knowing her vitals and assessment, and he actually "huffed" at me over the phone, shouted to make her NPO and then hung up on me. He did this again the following day for another patient when I was giving him critical lab values for a H&H. A few times my preceptor has called doctors for me, since I'm not 100% up to speed, and they've yelled at her too. I just feel like I can't win.
I'm not super thick skinned, like a lot of the nurses. While a mean doctor would never stop me from calling when it's really necessary, I just have so much anxiety and frustration surrounding it. I've yet to meet a nice doctor here, and even a urologist was on our floor throwing things around because he couldn't find something. I just don't know what to do. It's literally making me question my want to be a nurse if all I do is get yelled at by doctors. What kind of career is that? Words or wisdom... anything?