Hey y'all. I've been a nurse for almost 9 months now and I'm seriously considering leaving the profession altogether. I graduated in December of 2018 and was ecstatic when I got a position as a new grad RN in a med surg residency program starting July of 2019. Packed up all my things and moved three hours away to a very rural community knowing no one.
From the moment I started, I struggled heavily, mostly due to anxiety which I was clinically diagnosed with two years ago and take meds for. I made a lot of mistakes and was constantly on the radar of my nurse educator and supervisor. Two months later, I got called in to my boss's office and she let me go over lying to my preceptor over charting something which I didn't. They felt as if they couldn't trust me anymore.
My options were get fired or be forced to resign. I was devastated. Moved back home to my parent's house and began looking for a new position.
Luckily, I landed another job in a psychiatric rehabilitation facility. Even before starting nursing school, mental health was my passion. I knew I wanted to work psych in the long term. I started this position late October of 2019 and lasted 3 1/2 months until Valentines day. I worked NOC's and was the only licensed staff for that shift. I was overwhelmed, had virtually no support and had to deal with toxic coworkers.
On February 12th, I made the mistake of covering an AM shift and was responsible for pulling meds from a med cart in sheets the old fashioned way and giving them to 50 patients. The next day my boss found out I made a ton of med errors and I seriously thought I was going to be fired on the spot. He gave me another chance to my surprise, but I had had enough and decided to quit.
My current position is in an acute psych facility which I started per diem in January of 2020. Here I feel like I have tons of support, charge nurses who are constantly checking up on me. I've only been called into my boss's office once in 5 months over messing up charting. I feel as if this is less hectic than my last job but I am very unhappy with it.
Psych nursing is not what I glorified it to be. What I thought psych nursing was vs what it really is is not what I expected it to be. What I feel like I really want to do is more in the line of social work or clinical psychology.
On top of all this I screw up constantly and have this fear of getting fired every time I step into the hospital. Today, I made a med error and sort of freaked out and stormed outside the patient's room after realizing I gave meds to the wrong patient. My coworkers tried to comfort me but now I feel like they feel like I can't be trusted.
I'm starting to think nursing is just not for me.
I'm fed up, burned out and I've come to the point where I just don't care anymore and I feel numb. I've had 3 jobs in 9 months which says a lot.
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.
Agree with above that it's important to take care of your own mental health first before you can take care of anyone else.
As a new grad I was careful with 5 rights so no med errors (that I know of!) but I had a situation that I still have nightmares about: My unit had a severely autistic young man in his 20s, nonverbal, frequently agitated, strong. Sweet but when he was out of control many staff got injured. One night I had to give Geodon while he was climbing, kicking, thrashing, etc. Short staffed so only CNA to help hold him, really unsafe way to give I'm.
She was trying to hold him down and not let him or us get hurt. I was rushing to draw up the geodon and it takes forever to reconstitute, shaking and shaking the vial while he's all over the place. I was flustered, uncapped the needle with too much force and the tip of the needle touched my thumb. In the moment I didn't feel it because I was so overwhelmed. I gave it and after disposing it, wash hands, etc I saw a little mark on my thumb where the needle had poked me. Basically I had poked myself and then the patient! OMG. I was crying, had to talk to manager and infection control. Luckily I have no diseases so they said there is no way I could have given him something. I tested for HIV/Hep C/Hep B, all negative. Pt was fine but I felt horrible and still do. Point is, I owned up to my mistake and followed all the correct steps, learned from it. Unless it is a true emergency it's not worth it to rush and make a mistake. Good luck! Hope no one thinks I'm a stupid nurse after reading this... but it was a stupid incident =(
You could find a nursing job that doesn’t involve meds. I work in an FQHC. Aside from the occasional flu shot, I rarely handle medications at all. Maybe you should look into outpatient work.
I agree. This is a good suggestion. There are nursing fields where you barely handle medication. I work as a school nurse and in one day I have 8 different students walk in my clinic for their scheduled medication. I've never made an error so far (Thank God) because I recognize the students well and their pill containers and the shapes of their pills.. And more importantly, I always make sure to check the container has their names on it before administering them the meds.
You mentioned that you are more into the role of a social worker or a psychologist. Probably you might want to look into a public health nursing because it involves lots of community/ patient education.
Follow the five rights... the right patient, the right drug, the right time, the right dose, and the right route—all of which are generally regarded as a standard for safe medication practices. I'd say taking your time in this area is a must in order to get the job done right. It doesn't matter if you are slow so long you are giving the medication to the right patient. There's a bunch of new nurses (even old ones) are still making same mistakes. So don't get discourage. Try to reflect what has happened and make improvements at the same time.. this can be done while walking, driving, taking a shower, etc.. don't feel discourage from these pesky failures. You will be fine as a nurse.
Don't give up. Just slow down a bit, and when you think you are too slow, slow down even more. Like someone else here in the thread pointed out, unless is life and death situation, you should be able to take your time to identify your patients, make sure they're getting what is prescribed to them.
It doesn't sound like you use a scanner, which means you have to be on top of your game even more. Tighten up on your rights and your work environment can be used to help you grow so when you get a better job, you won't lose it due to a med error.
Basically, what I heard was you should slow down and have a something that refocuses you because your anxiety is causing you to make mistakes. 00Try this... Breathe deeply while repeating after me, "The more anxious I feel, the more focused and clearer my thinking will be, and my actions will be deliberately precise." Repeat silently to yourself PRN.
My first 30 days on the floor, this saved me from leaving nursing altogether for the same reasons your having. Making mistakes because my anxiety was off the chain. That was almost 10 years ago. I still use this today when I feel my anxiety starting to build.
There is never ever a reason I can think of to for go using 2 patient identitiers and asking about allergies, if the patient is cognizant. I once refused to work a long-term care unit because 1. No one wore patient bracelets 2. Pics didn't remotely look like the patients.
Are you following the five medication rights? And are you verifying your patient's identity prior to giving meds?
When combined with trying to medicate 50 patients and do everything on time, I can see why mistakes were made. Doing the "5 rights" is extremely important. But to be fair, expecting one person to pass out meds to 50 people in a timely manner is ludicrous. But as many of us know, that is the system we are given and the expectations our corporate overlords have. God forbid they staff any facility to truly safe levels.
After a rocky start, you have found a position you can work with. Stop over analyzing and gain some R.N. experience. Not the time to change up professions, but you could take online courses towards psychology or social work.
I first want to say you show strength to own up to your mistakes and feelings in this forum. That being said, I agree with another poster who suggested keeping your license and jobs while you pursue (taking online classes, for example) a social work field. You sound like you want to help and care for people but get crazy with the technical details of the nursing reality. One of the big things my nursing instructors impressed on me was to trust my gut — yours is telling you what you need to do. Get out with dignity — your choice. Also, by the way — that med cup pre-load thing is terrible — it is not allowed by state where I am — it is asking for disaster... and known to be a source of likely med errors. Best of luck to you!!
First, SLOW DOWN. The patients aren't going anywhere. Second, take your anxiety meds and if you are then get the dosage increased. Third, it doesn't matter what job you have but if you keep quitting every time you get overwhelmed then you'll forever be unemployed. Also, get a darn pen & pad and write stuff down. Make an end of shift check off list.
First, SLOW DOWN. The patients aren't going anywhere. Second, take your anxiety meds and if you are then get the dosage increased. Third, it doesn't matter what job you have but if you keep quitting every time you get overwhelmed then you'll forever be unemployed. Also, get a darn pen & pad and write stuff down. Make an end of shift check off list.
I can’t repeat this advice enough. Slowing down takes care of very many, if not most of med errors. Talk with your supervisor and let her know that you will be slowing enough to work without med errors and ask for support in this if you think it will help. At least it will show that you are concerned with correcting the problem. Better to be scolded or criticized for being slow than for making mistakes. Speed of med pass will pick up as you gain confidence in taking the time to do it right.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
On 5/14/2020 at 10:27 PM, LibraNurse27 said:
As a new grad I was careful with 5 rights so no med errors (that I know of!) but I had a situation that I still have nightmares about: My unit had a severely autistic young man in his 20s, nonverbal, frequently agitated, strong. Sweet but when he was out of control many staff got injured. One night I had to give Geodon while he was climbing, kicking, thrashing, etc. Short staffed so only CNA to help hold him, really unsafe way to give I'm.
All I can think when reading this was that you were in a bad staffing situation. A patient who has a history of going ballistic and injuring staff, and a unit staffed by one nurse and one CNA. Was there anyone you could have called to help you get the situation under control? Otherwise, this wasn't your error. This one falls squarely on the shoulders of management and their staffing practices.
LibraNurse27, BSN, RN
972 Posts
Agree with above that it's important to take care of your own mental health first before you can take care of anyone else.
As a new grad I was careful with 5 rights so no med errors (that I know of!) but I had a situation that I still have nightmares about: My unit had a severely autistic young man in his 20s, nonverbal, frequently agitated, strong. Sweet but when he was out of control many staff got injured. One night I had to give Geodon while he was climbing, kicking, thrashing, etc. Short staffed so only CNA to help hold him, really unsafe way to give I'm.
She was trying to hold him down and not let him or us get hurt. I was rushing to draw up the geodon and it takes forever to reconstitute, shaking and shaking the vial while he's all over the place. I was flustered, uncapped the needle with too much force and the tip of the needle touched my thumb. In the moment I didn't feel it because I was so overwhelmed. I gave it and after disposing it, wash hands, etc I saw a little mark on my thumb where the needle had poked me. Basically I had poked myself and then the patient! OMG. I was crying, had to talk to manager and infection control. Luckily I have no diseases so they said there is no way I could have given him something. I tested for HIV/Hep C/Hep B, all negative. Pt was fine but I felt horrible and still do. Point is, I owned up to my mistake and followed all the correct steps, learned from it. Unless it is a true emergency it's not worth it to rush and make a mistake. Good luck! Hope no one thinks I'm a stupid nurse after reading this... but it was a stupid incident =(