Fellow student=back stabbed?

[esrun77]

So I'm a nursing student and I recently interviewed for a CNA position at a local hospital. The department director told me she was going to send me on to a peer interview because she planned on hiring me as long as the peer interview went well. The peer interview consisted of one RN and one CNA--who is a fellow nursing student and who I happen to have a minor history with--asking me questions. The interview went smoothly. And I didn't get the job. I won't get into what has gone on with "Lisa" and I, but as an example: my instructor once responded to Lisa's making fun of another student's compliment towards me by saying, "Everything is always about Lisa, isn't it?"

Anyways, if this job isn't what God intended for me, fine. Lisa had first dibs as she already worked there--whatever, I get it. My worry is that Lisa is going to say bad things about me to other students or even faculty behind my back. I don't want my reputation to be wrecked for Lisa not liking me for whatever reason it may be--I actually thought, despite her occasional passive aggressive jabs, that we were at least somewhat friends. How am I supposed to act around her and to our mutual friends about her? I don't want to allow her to damage my reputation but I also want to avoid drama.

[dishes, BSN, RN]

Allegations, judgments and labels were not made. I presented my story and conflict management was actually my question, but thanks for your reiteration.

"back stabbed, passive aggressive" are not allegations and labels?

[november17, ASN, RN]

I think her opinion could carry enough weight to make or break OP. If the CNA is a valued, respected employee, the manager may trust her judgment. I've been asked before if applicants I went to school with would b a good fit for our unit and I've always been honest. Why would I lie if someone isn't a good fit and have it come back on me.

OP has already said she has a "history" with this CNA. That can come back and hurt you. OP, I wouldn't worry about what may or may not be said to you. I would focus on school and looking for a job and not worry about anyone else.

I was thinking of it in terms of the sheets HR and nursing management uses to score individual applicants these days. Peer interviewing is a buzzword fad. It's just part of the algorithm for hiring and doesn't really carry much weight.

[esrun77]

You know what, you're right. I just shouldn't have accepted this interview when I knew she worked on that floor, possibly jeopardizing our somewhat friendship and any professional success that may have been otherwise available. Lesson learned.

[Hollybobs]

Exactly--how do I respond professionally to such unprofessional conduct by a colleague? Ignore it? I mean, what if continues?

I don't see any unprofessional conduct. She may have genuine and valid concerns about you as a prospective employee. She may not have given any negative feedback about you. The RN may have objected to you. Any history of passive aggressive behaviour may be because she doesn't like you or doesn't respect you. I wanted to offer a plausible alternative perspective as there a lot of assumptions in what you've said.

To answer your question on conflict management I'd echo the previous posters. Be professional by focusing on getting a job then doing your job well. Even if someone is behaving needlessly maliciously (which she may well be) the best response to that is to be good at your job. People generally respect this whatever they think of you personally. Forget about her a little, don't let her take up any more headspace.

If you want and you think it might help then you could speak to her directly. I don't think from what you say that it would have a positive outcome but if the situation really frustrates you, you could try to find out what she is actually thinking rather than guessing.

[springchick1, ADN, RN]

I was thinking of it in terms of the sheets HR and nursing management uses to score individual applicants these days. Peer interviewing is a buzzword fad. It's just part of the algorithm for hiring and doesn't really carry much weight.

We don't actually use sheets but our peer interviews play a large part in the decision to hire someone. Maybe I just have a great manager who actually listens to the employees.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

Peer interviewing is a buzzword fad. It's just part of the algorithm for hiring and doesn't really carry much weight.

No so.

If there is a person that I peer interview or someone I worked with at a previous facility, I DO get asked what I think about the person, how well did they do, etc. I even wasn't involved in a few peer interviews and management and peer reviewers pulled me aside and asked what I thought of them professionally; I went to bat for two-one was hired, the other was passed, and the one who I knew as one who "doesn't play well with others" didn't interview well and I told them about their behavior and they were not hired.

So, NOT a buzzword at my facility.

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

As you've learned, nursing is a small world. Relationships in nursing school and on the job open or close doors for future opportunities. I once interviewed for a job, and as I walked in to the interview, there sat a former co-worker. We hugged, caught up a bit, and I was offered the job a day later. Unfortunately, I couldn't take it because they missed my salary requirement by thousands of dollars, but even then, I didn't burn my bridges in turning it down.

it may very well be that Lisa's opinion of you prevented you from getting the job, just as much as good opinions GET people jobs. Consider it a lesson learned.

[Nonyvole, BSN, RN]

OP, Lisa is an acquaintance at best, not a friend. And I'd treat her as such.

This is where you get to be the bigger person. She starts making passive-aggressive digs at you? Let her. My personal favorite is to give the dig exactly as much attention as it's worth, which is nothing. Keep on doing what you were doing. (I've some VERY PA in-laws and former coworkers.)

Or, in other language, drop the rope. Not your circus, not your ponies. So yes, the peer evaluation in the interview process was a bust - like you said, would you want to work on a unit with her?

And she brings this up at school? Eh, you've found something that you're quite happy with.

[RNrhythm, BSN, RN]

Your situation may be exactly as you perceive it. The thing is, all interview and hiring situations have a huge degree of randomness. You just have to accept that. Until you have an offer letter in hand, even the most positive, encouraging things you hear are completely unreliable. Some people just always want to be positive and may give you unrealistic expectations. I think more often than not, someone else has already decided upon a different candidate or perhaps someone in HR whom you never met quashed your chances for some totally random reason, like "We have too many people from that school" or some other specious and undocumented reason.

This will happen again and again, unfortunately. There is nothing you can do about it. Don't take it personally and don't burn any bridges. Continue to be the professional who takes the high road.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

You know what, you're right. I just shouldn't have accepted this interview when I knew she worked on that floor, possibly jeopardizing our somewhat friendship and any professional success that may have been otherwise available. Lesson learned.

Exactly. If you have a history with someone, I wouldn't think that working with them along with dealing with them at school would be a great idea.

Who knows what happened or didn't happen with the results of the interview. Hard to say, and unfortunately, you can be not hired or let go at any time for no reason at all. I would have equally not enjoyed working and then to have your job ended at orientation end due to some passive aggressive BS. Which more than likely may have happened if you got the job and your "friend" made it a living nightmare.

There are other places to work. You may want to try one of the larger facility parent companies where you would have the opportunity to get your foot in the door.

Best wishes.

[morte, LPN, LVN]

i think a lot of posters are missing the point. OP is cautious about what Lisa may do to her school experience and getting thru school safely. my thought would be to net work, carefully, with other students, and an instructor or two. also, you know the saying keep your friends close, and your enemies closer....

[logank622]

It's also possible the RN sensed the tension between you and Lisa and mentioned it in her feedback to HR. If I were doing an interview and my colleague was responding poorly to the candidate, I wouldn't want to introduce that dynamic to my unit. I may not be impressed by my colleague, but ultimately she is already there and they're not going to get rid of her just to hire you. Lisa might not have helped you during the interview, but she's not necessarily directly responsible for your not being hired.

And honestly, if you already know there will be tension between the two of you, you probably don't want to work there anyway.

But even if Lisa had power during the interview, she's nobody outside of that workplace. As others have said, give her the attention she deserves - none at all. If she tries to say anything about you at school, just remember that her opinion carries much less weight and give your classmates enough credit - they probably don't want to get involved.

I wish you the best in your job search and in school. Don't let the Lisas of the world get you down.