Ever had to take care of someone you knew and/or didn't like?

Nurses General Nursing

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Right now, I'm a nursing student and I will soon be doing clinicals at the hospital near me. I know a lot of people and I think that I might come across someone that I know/are friends with OR someone that I DON'T like.

Has this ever happened to you guys and how do you deal with it?

**Can someone edit the title to "Ever had to take care of someone you KNEW or didn't like?" Darn typos!

Specializes in Trauma ICU, Peds ICU.
I know a lot of people and I think that I might come across someone that I know/are friends with OR someone that I DON'T like.

I don't like about 80-90% of the patients I care for. Just kidding... kind of.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

when i was in college, i discovered beer. (18 was the legal drinking age, and i discovered beer on my 18th birthday.) there was a college bar across the street from my dorm, and i discovered drinking to excess, hangovers and inappropriate behavior in those days as well. there was a guy who would make the rounds of the campus bars, whipping up girls' miniskirts and biting them on the ass or yanking their hoop earrings out of their ears. while i was too drunk to know any better, i came across this guy and he yanked on my hoops, ripping one out of my ear and enlarging the other hole . . . i woke up bloody with a vague memory of what had happened, but no clue who had done it. i also had an enormous bruise on my butt.

fast forward a few months and i'm doing my psych rotation in the community hospital. my very first patient was a guy with a history of attacking girls in bars. he remembered me, and taunted me saying i must have liked it or i wouldn't have taken him as a patient. my instructor intervened, thank the deity, and i finished my psych rotation in a different unit in a different hospital.

if you run across a patient you don't like, you suck it up and deal. if you run across the person who assaulted you in a bar, had an affair with your husband, robbed your house, tried to get you fired when he was working on your unit, sued your parents, ran over your dog or shot your partner back when you were a police officer and before nursing school, ask for a different assignment, and then take what you get. even if it means floating to another unit. these things are rare, but they do happen.

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Ruby does an excellent job of providing criteria for making judgement calls of when to suck it up and when to seek a new assignment.

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Specializes in Case Manager.

Thanks for all the advice... I can put aside my "feelings" towards people that have been abusive to me NON verbally... but assuming I DO get a patient that I have a violent past with (I mean I live in a really rough ghetto neighborhood with lots of crime) then I'll have to judge on a case by case basis.

Like one poster said, I AM in a position of power to care for this patient and this patients life can literally be in my hands. It would be very unprofessional of me to let my bias influence me to the point where the patient (regardless of our background) was being harmed or put in an unsafe environment.

Guess the mantra "forgive, but don't forget" works well in nursing.

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Specializes in LTC, home health, critical care, pulmonary nursing.

Sort of off topic, but when I was in nursing school, a classmate had a situation in which the nurse she was following that day was her ex-husband's new wife. AWKWARD. They both handled it really well though. It's always a little weird when I get residents who I know or whose families I know, even when I like them. Especially since my unit is all dementia, all the time. Tends to throw people for a loop at first.

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Many times in nursing, you will have patients that you would never want as a friend, in a million years . . . but, you just tuck those feeling away, and you do your job. Realize that when people are in the hospital, they are "not at their best" . . . very scared, vulnerable, feeling like crap . . . so many times, patients will not be polite to you . . . you will learn to ignore the delirious and deal with the demanding . . .

This is a good point. You may even have to take care of a jerk, only to find that they're behaving that way because they're sick and miserable... and nice as pie when they're healthy!

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Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.

My BFF's stepmother was my patient in the OR. She is a very private person, and never shared much with me although we have known each other for 30 years, spent every holiday together and celebrated many birthdays together. While we got along well, I still felt awkward about taking on her care, because my BFF's mother and I are very close. I went to her holding room, I told her that I was assigned to her surgeon that day, but gave her the choice of requesting another nurse. I was very professional about the conversation and assured her that no offense would be taken, and that her focus should be on her...I didn't want her to worry over the fact that someone she knew would be taking care of her in a very vulnerable and intimate situation. I told her that I understood that she was extremely private, and that my job bound me to confidentiality. I explained that even if my BFF called me to check up on her, that I could not even confirm that she was in the hospital. She seemed to take a deep breath and her shoulders relaxed. She then surprised me by saying, "I am so GLAD you are here with me. I was hoping you would be my nurse. I feel so safe now." She had tears in her eyes and reached for my hand. I had no idea that she felt that way.

As far as taking care of someone you have had a violent run in with....hmmm...those are extenuating circumstances, and I would simply excuse myself.

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Specializes in LTC, home health, critical care, pulmonary nursing.
My BFF's stepmother was my patient in the OR. She is a very private person, and never shared much with me although we have known each other for 30 years, spent every holiday together and celebrated many birthdays together. While we got along well, I still felt awkward about taking on her care, because my BFF's mother and I are very close. I went to her holding room, I told her that I was assigned to her surgeon that day, but gave her the choice of requesting another nurse. I was very professional about the conversation and assured her that no offense would be taken, and that her focus should be on her...I didn't want her to worry over the fact that someone she knew would be taking care of her in a very vulnerable and intimate situation. I told her that I understood that she was extremely private, and that my job bound me to confidentiality. I explained that even if my BFF called me to check up on her, that I could not even confirm that she was in the hospital. She seemed to take a deep breath and her shoulders relaxed. She then surprised me by saying, "I am so GLAD you are here with me. I was hoping you would be my nurse. I feel so safe now." She had tears in her eyes and reached for my hand. I had no idea that she felt that way.

As far as taking care of someone you have had a violent run in with....hmmm...those are extenuating circumstances, and I would simply excuse myself.

That is SOOOO sweet!

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I know what you mean OP. Im a new nurse about to start soon. While I was working as a tech I came across people that I know on numerous occasions. Mostly visitors of ppl that was on our floor or another floor. Many times these people were so far from my past that they didn't even recognize me. Other times I wasn't even assigned to them, so nothing to worry about there. I have wondered this same thing too. What if I'm assigned a person I know whether I got along with them or not? Would this be some sort of conflict? I know some people are private and would not like someone they know even if it was someone they liked, knowing their private medical information. Hmmm I guess management shouldn't having a problem switching the assignment. Anything to make the patient comfortable. I can't imagine this happening a lot though. What are the odds that you are going to always get assigned to the patient that you know that just so happen to be on your floor.

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My BFF's stepmother was my patient in the OR. She is a very private person, and never shared much with me although we have known each other for 30 years, spent every holiday together and celebrated many birthdays together. While we got along well, I still felt awkward about taking on her care, because my BFF's mother and I are very close. I went to her holding room, I told her that I was assigned to her surgeon that day, but gave her the choice of requesting another nurse. I was very professional about the conversation and assured her that no offense would be taken, and that her focus should be on her...I didn't want her to worry over the fact that someone she knew would be taking care of her in a very vulnerable and intimate situation. I told her that I understood that she was extremely private, and that my job bound me to confidentiality. I explained that even if my BFF called me to check up on her, that I could not even confirm that she was in the hospital. She seemed to take a deep breath and her shoulders relaxed. She then surprised me by saying, "I am so GLAD you are here with me. I was hoping you would be my nurse. I feel so safe now." She had tears in her eyes and reached for my hand. I had no idea that she felt that way.

This is an example of how and why honest, open communication is so important. How a patient is approached in situations like this is essential. First impressions are critical. Even if the patient had turned you down, this still represents a successful encounter. But I believe that patients who are on the edge of how they feel, and many are -- when approached like this, will most often accept the care. It's a matter of trust. And this is a textbook example of how to elicit trust.

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if I know the patient, I request to not do certain things like EKG's, where they have to take their shirts off. I dont want them to think that i will be looking at them as former classmates instead of patients.

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Specializes in Med Surg.

In a relatively small community it's impossible not to find yourself in this kind of situation. It happens to me frequently and the only issue I ever ran into was when a little lady informed me that there was no way that "some snotty nosed brat whose diaper she used tp change was going to be wiping HER butt." I told her her butt wasn't so attractive that I wanted to look at it anyway.

Okay, she was my aunt.

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