Ever date a patient? Or would you?

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Of course, not while he or she is under your care. But after they are discharged, does this occur? I wonder. You see the patient sick and hurting and so it must be an unattractive turnoff. 

I had lunch with my (former) nurse once and didn't see her again but wanted to. Our ages were wide apart. 

On 11/7/2020 at 11:24 AM, Mywords1 said:

I am merely asking if this happens, not that you should. Its an objective question, and do not misinterpret me without understanding the broader field of ethics in society. Months or a year after the patient leaves the health setting is there still a power imbalance? Students and professors date after the student leaves the college and many of them marry so I hear. But it takes work and reconciliation on both sides and no one is shocked. It also happens a lot in other professions.

Yes, it happens. A friend of mine married her patient and they had a great relationship. 

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Specializes in Psychiatry, Community, Nurse Manager, hospice.

I think it could be acceptable under some circumstances.

I work in psychiatry and developmental disabilities and it is totally out of the question for me and would be at least extremely unethical and maybe even illegal.

I think its wrong to elicit a date or accept a date from someone while they are under your care, in every circumstance. But let's say you work in same day surgery or something and then you happen to meet someone at a bar who's like-hey weren't you my nurse when I had that procedure 3 years ago? Well, I feel like thats a level playing field and its probably okay. 

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I never have but it happens

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I once had a patient ask me out on a date. Politely turned her down, her gonorrhea history notwithstanding. 

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No, (and to preface, I’m in a happy relationship!) But years ago, as a patient on two separate occasions (snowboarding injuries) I had one nurse during each admission who stood out to me, I admired and was mesmerized by. I asked one of them out, and she politely declined but she didn’t want to be my nurse again (I know because she was there on my day of discharge and didn’t say goodbye.) I was pretty sad about that. I considered going back and asking her out again a year later because I thought for sure she might think differently with me being able to walk and not being in a gown LOL) but I didn’t because I didn’t want anything construable as harassment. I’m fine with the past though because as I mentioned, I’m in an awesome relationship! My respect and admiration for those nurses though may have played a minor role in me wanting to become a nurse... if it weren’t for them, I suppose I might not be in the great relationship I’m in now...

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On 11/10/2020 at 6:02 AM, Jedrnurse said:

Working impaired and dating someone that you once had as a patient are ethical equivalents??? I don't see it...

Definitely not the same

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While ethically it's frowned upon because of the specific role/power balance, it does happen. I had a patient whose wife was an ex-nurse. They told me that she had been his nurse previously long time ago and they started dating while she was caring for him. She ended up leaving nursing for reasons that were not mentioned to me. But this is life, things happen. They were consenting adults. 

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My ex husband managed to snag two nurses as a patient that I know of after we separated. Both in a psychiatric setting, one he even had a kid with. I am not sure how the heck they fell for him other than he is extremely manipulative and has all these sob stories, I'm sure they were surprised when they also found out he is abusive too. I was not a nurse then but I am in  nursing school now. Someone like that looks for someone that has the need to take care of someone and fix them. Yall be careful out there

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Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.

I can't think of a single patient I have had that the idea of an intimate relationship wouldn't make me go "Ewww". 

So I supposed, for me, the answer is no.

 

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Specializes in LTC.

I personally wouldn’t. However I don’t really care what 2 consenting adults do off the clock. 

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