You can always tell when I've been hanging out on the Allnurses.com forums too much -- I get up on a soap box. I'm amazed, though, at how many new nurses are grasping at straws to find "reasons" to quit their first jobs because they're unhappy and they're just positive that things are going to be better elsewhere. Even if there is no elsewhere in the immediate future. It's not THEIR fault that they're miserable -- it's the job. Or their co-workers are all mean and out to get them. (Probably because of their incredible beauty.) Staffing is a nightmare, the CNAs are all hiding and they're afraid they're going to "loose" their license. They'd better quit RIGHT NOW, so they don't "loose" that license. (I wonder if that one is as transparent to spouses who are looking for a little help with the rent -- not to mention those school loans you've racked up -- as it is to some of the rest of us.) The job is ruining their lives and their mental health -- they're seriously worried for their mental health if they don't quit right now. Where did all of these fragile people come from?
Seriously, folks. The first year of nursing sucks. You have the internet and all of that -- how could you not know that the first year of nursing sucks? It does. We've all been through it. The only way to GET through it is to GO through it, but there's a big group of newbies every year who are SURE that doesn't apply to them. No one as ever been as miserable as they are. No one understands. They HATE going to work every day. Management is targeting them and they're sure they're going to be fired. They're concerned that their mental health might be permanently damaged by the trauma of staying in that job ONE MORE DAY. Given the inevitability of "loosing" that license and permanent damage to their mental health, it's all right to quit that job tomorrow, isn't it? Or maybe it's that their DREAAAAAAAAM job is opening up, and they've been offered the job. It's OK to quit this job to take their DREAAAAAAAAM job, isn't it?
How do they even know their dream job is hiring if they have every intention of making their first job work out? What are all those job applications doing out there, floating around if they're serious about this job? You DID intend to keep this job for one to two years when you took it, didn't you? If not, shame on you!
The first year of nursing sucks. You're going to hate going to work every day, and some of you are going to cry all the way to work and all the way home. You'll be exhausted, both mentally and physically and your normal hobbies and activities may take second seat to the job. You'll be constantly afraid of making a mistake, and you will MAKE mistakes. You'll feel incompetent. You may lose sleep because you're worrying about your job. Switching jobs isn't going to miraculously make you confident and competent. It's just going to delay you on your path through that first miserable year. It may even look bad on your resume, paint you as a job hopper. (I'm always shocked by how many new nurses are on their third or fourth job in less than two years who will assure me that they're not job hoppers. Honey, if you're on your third job in less than two years, you're a job hopper. Really.)
Don't people have bills to pay? Or is it that no one feels responsible for paying their own bills anymore? How is it that so many people feel free to just up and quit a paying job without another one in sight? I guess I'm getting old, because I really don't get it.
My first job was in an ALF that had problems retaining nurses more than 3 months. The workload wasn't bad (though I didn't know any better), but the politics were brutal. Any conflict between aides and nurses was decided in the aides' favor because they were cheaper. I lasted a year. My second was in a SNF that had problems keeping nurses for more than a month. The floor had fewer patients, lots of bullying, dog-eat-dog politics, and aides who did nothing beyond ADLs (and had to be persuaded to do even that). I lasted 6 weeks.
Older nurses come from a time when loyalty toward an employer was rewarded, with increased pay, more vacation time, and other perks. Paying your dues actually paid off. I'm Gen X, and started my working life when an employee could go above and beyond, give 110%, and be laid off anyway. Sticking with a job only makes you more expensive, assuming you can get a raise. Loyalty shouldn't be a one-way street.
I learned along ago that loyalty to an employer is foolish. There's no shame in knowing when to get out of a bad situation. Life is too short to work in a place that makes you miserable. If a floor or unit doesn't match an employee's goals, why shouldn't they leave? If the tables were turned, and that employee didn't match the hospital's goals, they would have no problem firing the employee.
I'm surprised they haven't gone to paying people way less for orientation hours. I guess that's not where the real money is burnt on orienting a new employee.
Specializes in Nursing Education, CVICU, Float Pool.
Yes I knew this was coming. Our unit is the feeder unit for the regional anesthesia schools. Other reasons for leaving include: "This job is ruining my social life. They actually expect you to work WEEKENDS." "I graduated at the top of my class from Duke/Hopkins/UCSF and I shouldn't have to clean up old man poop!" "I hate bedside nursing; I'm gonna be an NP." And then, because it's a young crowd and a large teaching hospital, "My boyfriend matched at Duke, so I'll be moving." "My husband found a job, but it's in Alaska." We're not losing nurses because they hate our unit or think we're all bullies. Which seems to be what you're implying.[/quote']
I agree that it is the case that many people leave for the reason listed above. We've had people leave our unit, which most would kill to work for, but because they finished NP school or started CRNA school etc.... We don't have anyone that quit (that I know of) because they thought they were too good to do x, y, and z. Our heart center is managed by a Duke Medicine and we have heavy ties with Duke (we are 1.5 hours away from Duke) so I'm kind of surprised we haven't for that whole "I graduated from Duke, Georgetown, etc.... thing, but everyone is practices humility (while also being proud of their school) and everyone on staff are great team players on our unit, thankfully.
A lot of nurses leave because of the reasons above, are all of them bad reasons, no not really, but some hospitals are taking steps to try to retain staff by requiring new hires (regardless of experience, but especially new grads) to sign a contract saying they will stay a year or two years, that was the case with some job offers I got.
It's understandable that hospitals want staff that are more prone to being long-term, it's cheaper and less stressful on the system.
I was always taught that you give any job at least one good year of effort before moving on and I agree with that sentiment for the most part.
I'm surprised they haven't gone to paying people way less for orientation hours. I guess that's not where the real money is burnt on orienting a new employee.
From what I've seen, HCA is doing these very poorly paid "internships" without a promise of future employment.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I agree that it is the case that many people leave for the reason listed above. We've had people leave our unit, which most would kill to work for, but because they finished NP school or started CRNA school etc.... We don't have anyone that quit (that I know of) because they thought they were too good to do x, y, and z. Our heart center is managed by a Duke Medicine and we have heavy ties with Duke (we are 1.5 hours away from Duke) so I'm kind of surprised we haven't for that whole "I graduated from Duke, Georgetown, etc.... thing, but everyone is practices humility (while also being proud of their school) and everyone on staff are great team players on our unit, thankfully.
A lot of nurses leave because of the reasons above, are all of them bad reasons, no not really, but some hospitals are taking steps to try to retain staff by requiring new hires (regardless of experience, but especially new grads) to sign a contract saying they will stay a year or two years, that was the case with some job offers I got.
It's understandable that hospitals want staff that are more prone to being long-term, it's cheaper and less stressful on the system.
I was always taught that you give any job at least one good year of effort before moving on and I agree with that sentiment for the most part.
Sent from my iPhone using allnurses.com
"My husband found a job . . . but it's a thousand miles from here!" is actually a good reason for leaving. Most employers understand that you want to stay with your spouse. Boyfriend? Maybe not so much, but a lot of nurses leave to follow boyfriends around the country as well. But when someone quits because weekends are ruining their social life or they're too special to clean up poop, one wonders what they thought they were getting into in the first place!
Specializes in Nursing Education, CVICU, Float Pool.
"My husband found a job . . . but it's a thousand miles from here!" is actually a good reason for leaving. Most employers understand that you want to stay with your spouse. Boyfriend? Maybe not so much but a lot of nurses leave to follow boyfriends around the country as well. But when someone quits because weekends are ruining their social life or they're too special to clean up poop, one wonders what they thought they were getting into in the first place![/quote']
I agree. It's a very different world we are living in though. Many more people are in "committed " relationships even if they are not married yet . I also agree that leaving because you have to work weekends isn't the best reason to leave a job. It's work, it's not meant to be scheduled totally around your life, you make room and allowances to keep a job, and in the field of nursing (and other fields) that means working weekends and holidays. I always knew that was part of the deal and have embraced it. I count myself fortunate that I don't have to work every weekend (we rotate) but even if I did, I think I could learn to live with it, at least I would still have a job on a great unit with great staff.
I do think that some people need to remember that work isn't supposed to be totally scheduled around your school, recreational, and family time. I personally feel we should integrate our "off time" to work with our work time. For the most part, IMHO, it wouldn't be work if it was always convenient. Lol.
Well, I am a mother, and I do have adult offspring (children no longer), and I told them I did not have them to stay at home and be dependent. I had them to go out into the world and make it a better place by hard work. I have seen what happens to people who never have to struggle, whose snowplow parents (you know, the ones that remove all obstacles) deprived them of the opportunities to fail and try again, who believe their parents and other older people owe them an easier (or better) life. They come up against the realities of life -- not everybody cares what you think, you have to make it on your own merit and effort, nobody owes you unconditional support and admiration, you don't deserve a better life just because you're here -- and the shock of it all is disorienting and, for some, crushing. Many are paralyzed, and really have no idea what to do or how to start. This, I submit, would not be a functional way for the human race to progress or advance.
My kids have never been crushed by disappointment or failure in the way I hear so many younger nurses describe. They, like their mother, say, "Oh, well, whiskey-tango-foxtrot, let's try that a different way, guess I need to look at that differently, guess I need to learn something else to apply to that kind of situation..." They are raising their kids the same way. And we all get on with it.
You are the captain of your soul.
This whole "kick 'em out on their 18th birthday"/sink or swim concept is actually a fairly American and somewhat new concept. In many European and Asian countries, it is not unusual for someone to stay at home until he/she marries. In fact, it is fairly common for Chinese and Japanese parents to pay for their children and support them well into adulthood. And guess what? Asian children are outperforming American children, experiencing more academic, career and financial success in their older years.
In addition, living at home with parents is not a bad thing. In fact, nuclear families are fairly new concept. I live with my mother, but guess what? I'm not a dependent leech on her back. I work two jobs, I go to school (and am paying for my education 100%) and I stay out of trouble (for the most part ).
Supporting your children has nothing to do with "entitlement" but everything to do with wanting society to progress. It is hard for a kid to do better if he or she is left to the wolves without resources, so to speak. Sure, you could argue some anecdote about poor John Doe over there who managed to be a success story, but in reality, children are more likely to thrive if they have a support system, NOT one that "coddles" to them (because I think that is how you are misinterpreting my post), but one that doesn't make a person struggle for the hell of it.
Trust me when I say that people will find struggles in their lives; a parent does NOT need to make them. I didn't have a hard childhood (it wasn't easy either), but life's challenges still found me in the form of depression, anxiety and mental illness. Life's challenges found my younger brother in the form of autism. Life's challenges found my aunt in the form of cancer. Yes, you could argue that making your kid experience strife earlier on will instill character, but it also could break them as well. Again, it is all about finding a balance between the "sink or swim" approach and constant coddling and over protection.
That being said, as someone with Borderline Personality Disorder, I have learned that it is important to not think in black or white. One can have the full emotional support of his or her parents while "going out into the world and making it a better place." One can also prepare his or her child for the harsh realities of the world without allowing his or her children to struggle just for the sake of struggling. It really unnerves me that there are some parents out there who can help pay for their kids education without experiencing financial burden but choose not to to "instill character" or because "they had it hard, so should the kids." It saddens me to hear about kids going into so much debt, working multiple jobs and ultimately failing out of school unnecessarily.
While I don't believe in coddling kids, I DO believe in supporting them to the best of our ability.
This whole "kick 'em out on their 18th birthday"/sink or swim concept is actually a fairly American and somewhat new concept. In many European and Asian countries, it is not unusual for someone to stay at home until he/she marries. In fact, it is fairly common for Chinese and Japanese parents to pay for their children and support them well into adulthood. And guess what? Asian children are outperforming American children, experiencing more academic, career and financial success in their older years.
Supporting your children has nothing to do with "entitlement" but everything to do with wanting society to progress. It is hard for a kid to do better if he or she is left to the wolves without resources, so to speak. Sure, you could argue some anecdote about poor John Doe over there who managed to be a success story, but in reality, children are more likely to thrive if they have a support system, NOT one that "coddles" to them (because I think that is how you are misinterpreting my post), but one that doesn't make a person struggle for the hell of it.
While I don't believe in coddling kids, I DO believe in supporting them to the best of our ability.
I don't think I was advocating the throw-them-out-to-sink-or-swim-at-18 model. Both my kids finished college before they moved out. They were thus well-prepared to go out and be productive professional people, are productive professional people, married with kids themselves, and we stay in close touch. Not at the three-texts-a-day-with-mommy level, but like grownups. We support each other emotionally, not financially, like grownups.
It'd be great if the lazy people would realize that nursing isn't an easy way to make $$$ BEFORE they get done with nursing school, and stop annoying the people who have to train them before they leave in six months for the next job they think will be easier. Or before they go into nursing school. But I guess they'd rather believe the ads they see on tv for the for-profit schools. I guess they're too lazy to do research. Cuz they're lazy. LOL
I think that you may have missed the point that I was trying to make. I wasn't advocating laziness. In fact, my post in it's entirety, stated just the opposite of that. I was just saying that every generation has faced these problems. It's nothing new. Every generation has had their share of good and bad workers, and people shouldn't generalize folks just because they fit in a certain age bracket. I'm sure that long before television was heard to tell of, (and the ads that glorify nursing), some people were getting into nursing for all the wrong reasons ($$$$). And then finding out afterwards, that it wasn't what they thought it would be.
I don't think I was advocating the throw-them-out-to-sink-or-swim-at-18 model. Both my kids finished college before they moved out. They were thus well-prepared to go out and be productive professional people, are productive professional people, married with kids themselves, and we stay in close touch. Not at the three-texts-a-day-with-mommy level, but like grownups. We support each other emotionally, not financially, like grownups.
Ah. Okay, I think we are on the same page. However, I will admit that my mom is my best friend. She's my rock and the only person who has been there for me thick and thin. I hope to take good care of her in her old age.
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I don't think I was advocating the throw-them-out-to-sink-or-swim-at-18 model. Both my kids finished college before they moved out. They were thus well-prepared to go out and be productive professional people, are productive professional people, married with kids themselves, and we stay in close touch. Not at the three-texts-a-day-with-mommy level, but like grownups. We support each other emotionally, not financially, like grownups.
Why does the first year of nursing have to suck (OP's quote)? I am changing careers at 47 years old and have a year left on my BSN. Recently, I retired as an Air Force officer and decided to do something totally different, for many reasons. I guess I am the eternal optimist, but I wouldn't have taken 3 years out of my life to do prereqs. and finish a 4th degree if I thought there would be "sucky" years. In every career, there is good and bad, but I am expecting to start a new career that will be fulfilling and rewarding. I know there will be times of frustration (my wife has been a nurse for nearly 20 years so I am not going into this blind). Are there nurses out there whose first year didn't suck?
). 
Not_A_Hat_Person, RN
2,900 Posts
My first job was in an ALF that had problems retaining nurses more than 3 months. The workload wasn't bad (though I didn't know any better), but the politics were brutal. Any conflict between aides and nurses was decided in the aides' favor because they were cheaper. I lasted a year. My second was in a SNF that had problems keeping nurses for more than a month. The floor had fewer patients, lots of bullying, dog-eat-dog politics, and aides who did nothing beyond ADLs (and had to be persuaded to do even that). I lasted 6 weeks.
Older nurses come from a time when loyalty toward an employer was rewarded, with increased pay, more vacation time, and other perks. Paying your dues actually paid off. I'm Gen X, and started my working life when an employee could go above and beyond, give 110%, and be laid off anyway. Sticking with a job only makes you more expensive, assuming you can get a raise. Loyalty shouldn't be a one-way street.
I learned along ago that loyalty to an employer is foolish. There's no shame in knowing when to get out of a bad situation. Life is too short to work in a place that makes you miserable. If a floor or unit doesn't match an employee's goals, why shouldn't they leave? If the tables were turned, and that employee didn't match the hospital's goals, they would have no problem firing the employee.