Does anyone else feel like there is too much gossip going on?

Tweety, BSN, RN · Nov 9, 2005

They don't gossip in nursing school? About the insturctors, nurses at the hospital or fellow students?I've never worked anywhere, restaurant, insurance company or hospital where people didn't gossip (or complain about their jobs/boss, etc.). I just presumed it was human nature.

Most of the time it's just harmless talk. Sometimes it's petty. Occasionally, it's ugly.

I don't see a lot of backstabbing going on fortunately.

I try not to be drug into it, because it is unprofessional and harmful. I'm not sure the implications for patient care however.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Nov 9, 2005

In my opinion whenever you get females together there is going to be gossip it's kind of in our nature. I have to say im guilty of it myself.

Wow, 23 minutes. :stone

No it is not "kind of our nature." It's a personal nature to the person, if any.

Daytonite, BSN, RN · Nov 9, 2005

What I have seen, however, is a lot of gossiping from the nursing staff. Everytime one nurse leaves, it is like the nurses regress to teenagers and begin bashing her. I feel like this is extremely unprofessional, and am rather worried about how patient care is affected by this. Has anyone else experienced this?

Gossip is a killer of morale. No matter where you go you are probably going to find it to some degree. All you can do is make your own stand on this. Do not participate in these discussions. Walk away from them. Change the subject. When you feel brave enough, tell people you don't want to talk about others. Eventually, and hopefully, they, at least, won't do it around you. You have no control over what they say about you behind your back, but then again, you probably won't know what it is. It becomes a problem when it affects how people treat each other. I worked with another nurse who took every opportunity she could to bad mouth me. People would come up to me and tell me about it. (That's another problem as well.) This gossiper was often surly and sometimes downright snotty with me, especially when I made a decision she didn't agree with. I had to take this person aside several times and talk to her about stopping this. I also asked the other staff to stop her from talking to them about me and to re-direct her to my direction. Strangely, she was much older than I. Pay attention in your classes when communication and leadership are being taught because the information you learn in these subjects will help you learn how to deal with gossip and it's effects.

Gennaver, MSN · Nov 9, 2005

Although I do not have that much experience with the activities that go on at my hospital (because I am a nursing student), I feel like I am back in highschool again. I am basically an observer, trying to learn how to act when I get out in the "real world" of nursing. What I have seen, however, is a lot of gossiping from the nursing staff. Everytime one nurse leaves, it is like the nurses regress to teenagers and begin bashing her. I feel like this is extremely unprofessional, and am rather worried about how patient care is affected by this. Has anyone else experienced this?

Hi Ashley,

Wow, are you right on the mark. I went to an interview on the unit of a local hospital and the nurse manager introduces me to one of the staff RNs and mentions how we might now each other because we both worked at another hospital on the same floor.

I sort of recognized the women, (we worked different days on different shifts but, i sort of recognized her). This woman doesn't miss a beat and looks at me and says, I don't remember you but, how is so and so doing from her treatment, (one of our clinical team leaders). I replied that I was unaware that so and so was having any treatment but, I hope she was fine. Next she asks what do you think about another so and so? I'll bet she had to have a tummy tuck. I said, I am surprised at how much weight she lost, I saw her in a company newletter. She replied, "oh, she had a gastric!" My reponse, "Oh, well I am happy to know that it wasn't an illness."

See, this woman did not even know me yet, the gossip was flying. Sadly, after I did get offered the position, the next week the hospital called and said they were trying to place me on another floor. I figured it is fine because if there is such a gossip hound there that another floor would be better. Also, the floor that she and I worked at in the other hospital was so incredibly difficult with major gossip and bullying and I really do not doubt that she called up the other place to get my scoop when she did not recognize me.

Pity for the almost new clinical manager that did hire me in the first place, I would have been a great asset to their hematology/oncology floor as I am hard working, dedicated, smart, perceptive and cooperative. Yet, because of a gossip....

Gen

p.s. she did me a favor, drawing your boundries day in and day out with them is tiring

SmilingBluEyes · Nov 9, 2005

When there is gossiping, you can lead by example by REFUSING to participate or spread it. That is the first thing I do. I will not get into the rumor mill----being on the receiving end of such viciousness is horrible. I put myself in the other's shoes. Be above that. If someone approaches you with "juicy stuff" just tell them, you are sorry, but you are busy and dont' have the time or inclination for such chatter. They will get the message, soon enough.

nurse_clown · Nov 9, 2005

i think it happens everywhere. i hate to admit that it happens at my work too. but i always walk away when it starts. i've seen when things get blown out of proportion and feelings get hurt. it's not good for the workplace.

as as nursing student, please try not to involved yourself or concern yourself with something petty like that. gossiping is not professional. when something like that happens, look over emergency procedures, see if some charting needs to be done, or a patient's hand needs to be held. not all nurses are like that. the good ones are way too busy with their own job and their own patients. you'll also notice that the gossipers never seem to have enough time to get their work done. don't be like them. it's hard to think if they are ever happy. but i don't have time to think about that!

perfectbluebuildings, BSN, RN · Nov 9, 2005

Gossip most often seems to happen when we are all sitting there at computers charting and someone gets bored of the oh so exciting "Respiratory Assessment" or whatever screen. I usually just sit there and stare at my computer screen, pretend to be invisible, and hope the person will shut up, go away or both! Very passive I know and I know there are better ways to deal. But that's how I deal with it right now.

And gossip does hurt even when it seems the most innocuous thing. I really realized that today. This morning I heard a couple nurses talking at length about me regarding a pt I had reported off about... I think the one nurse was defending me and it was not horrible nasty crap or something, just regarding pt care and some things I should have caught... but it was a horrible feeling to hear that. I was out of sight from them at a computer and by the time I realized it was going on I was too embarrassed to make myself known, I just went on charting and pretended not to care or hear. I know I should have said something but I really didn't want to, and anyway they probably had some valid points, I had a busy night and I am inexperienced and I probably did miss some things. But yeah, gossip hurts people's feelings like crazy. I wished the one nurse who was concerned would have come to me and let me in on what she thought I missed, so I could learn from it for next time. Anyway, sorry, this was a touchy topic for me today so you get to hear all about it. Back on track everyone... the topic gossip at your workplace and how you deal with it etc. SOrry to derail it. :)

Gennaver, MSN · Nov 9, 2005

....
I was too embarrassed to make myself known, I just went on charting and pretended not to care or hear. I know I should have said something but I really didn't want to, and anyway they probably had some valid points, I had a busy night and I am inexperienced and I probably did miss some things. But yeah, gossip hurts people's feelings like crazy. I wished the one nurse who was concerned would have come to me and let me in on what she thought I missed, so I could learn from it for next time. Anyway, sorry, this was a touchy topic for me today so you get to hear all about it. Back on track everyone... the topic gossip at your workplace and how you deal with it etc. SOrry to derail it. :)

Rayrae,

I think it is also wise to pick and choose where and when to confront, (because it may be possible that not all situations where someone is offending us-my opinion only-are worthy of confronting). However, I do agree that you are very right, this nurse should have come directly to you, not to vent or gossip. That is underhanded, divisive and just wrong.

The way it looks to me, you are far better off for not having engaged in that incident. Besides, someone else may have watched you sitting there completely disregarding the gossip monger and that person may follow your example of 'grace'. :)

Gen

Cute_CNA, CNA · Nov 10, 2005

I think if people gossip TO you, they will also probably gossip ABOUT you.

epiphany · Nov 10, 2005

Gossip is toxic to the environment. Unfortunately it is also very prevalent in my work place. Sometimes a nurse is not even necessarily upset with another nurse, but the whole act of gossiping and backstabbing seems to be fuel they cannot live without. I hate it so much. I don't know what to do about it besides ignore it and refuse to get pulled it by it.

Another characteristic is passive-aggressivism. I can't wait to get out of this place, and I only started.

nurse_clown · Nov 10, 2005

:uhoh3: i have to reply to this again. i think this whole gossiping thing is outrageous. for the last month, i've been feeling "picked on" by a senior nurse. i've been really cool about it by not letting it bother me. this is at the part time ltc job. a couple weeks ago, she threatened to report the other night nurse and i. she preferred that we did some administrative procedures her way and she was going to report us to the don. she did it again last week. and then i learned last night that she and the other night nurse were talking about me. i felt so sick from anxiety. it's such an awful feeling to be the topic of discussion and not in a good way. i've been concentrating so hard on getting a handle on my own work. i work nights and i work with one psw. we mostly talk about ourselves when we get a chance.

all i know is, it's a horrible feeling to realize that some people have to think of me in a negative way. :imbar don't like that feeling.

Indy, LPN, LVN · Nov 10, 2005

It's not a good feeling when you bust your tootie to do a good job and someone manages to find a little thing to pick at you about. I know the feeling.

I have one like that where I work; as in, one's worse than anyone else. Most of the nurses, if you leave something off or don't know something, will let you know nicely. This one is a good ten years younger than me, (I don't think she knows this, I look babyish) and has proven time and time again that she simply can NOT take a report and start her day without asking questions until she finds something to complain about. Doesn't matter what nurse she's following, it happens every time, without fail. As soon as she finds a thing, the next word out of her mouth is the charge nurse's name, a little higher pitched and with a hint of whine in it (I'm southern, I know whine from twang and this is whine.) It's like being back in third grade!

I actually feel good if the picky thing is like it was yesterday morning. It was over pre-procedure prep. Lab work was done as ordered and so was the prep. However, I was told about how to be psychic and assume the procedure is gonna differ from the orders based on who the doctor is, so I can do things differently. Ok. That right there told me she couldn't find anything I ACTUALLY did wrong, so I said ok, didn't hang around long enough to hear anything else.

Don't let one person ruin your work experience if you can help it.