We've all heard weird, wild and even ludicrous things slip out of a doctor's mouth! Provide your quote for this National Nurses Week contest and you'll be entered to win a $250 amazon.com gift card!
Winner will be announced May 16, 2017
UPDATE May 19, 2017:
The winner of the 2017 National Nurses Week Doctors Say The Darnedest Things giveaway is user Racer15 who said:
I had a pt brought by EMS for altered mental status. ER doc is talking to the pt asking her what meds she takes. Starts listing them off and then says "and something to help with my memory, umm, it's called, umm..". Doc looks at her and says "well it's obviously not working", turns around and walks out
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We had an outpatient paracentesis and after checking the patient's ultrasound for fluid, the dr looked @ her and said, "There's no fluid, only cheeseburgers." And walked away.
she started crying and it took all we had not to laugh.
"You think you have it bad now as her nurse now, when she's older. I was her physician for two weeks when she was younger and got PTSD. I'm not kidding."
Specializes in Hospice, corrections, psychiatry, rehab, LTC.
We had an attention seeking person in the ER that would only "seize" when someone walked by or entered the bay. The doctor wasn't curious about the situation so he walked into the bay and the person started seizing and flailing. With a foley in hand the doctor said "if you don't stop that right now I'm going to put this catheter in you!". The patient stopped "seizing" sat right up in bed and didn't seize again for the rest of their ER visit.
We had a patient on my adult mental health unit who claimed to have seizures, but he talked to people all the way through them. The psychiatrist had never been present when one of these "seizures" took place, but he wanted to observe one so that he could evaluate what was going on with the patient mentally. I was sitting at the nurse station when the psych tech came in and said, "Mr. X is having another one of his seizures." The doctor nudged me and said, "Come on. This ought to be good."
Upon discharging a very smelly woman, MD placed an order for home health to go to hear home and bathe her three times a week for the next two weeks. When asked why, MD responded, "She has to come back in for a follow-up and I just got new office furniture and it is cloth...not vinyl."
Specializes in Hospice, corrections, psychiatry, rehab, LTC.
During my orderly days, one night I was assigned to ER. The physician on duty was an OB/GYN. We had a young boy come in (probably about ten years old) who had a fractured right arm that needed to be cast. The physician asked if I would help him in the cast room. He asked, "Do you know how to do this?"
On my adult mental health unit, we had a patient who suddenly started fading in and out of consciousness. Normally one of our medical attendings would have handled this, but in this particular case one of the cardiology staff had taken an interest while the patient was in ER (for reasons I have yet to figure out) and he told us that he would be following this patient medically. We called the cardiologist - and called - and called. Finally I called the psychiatrist and told him what was going on. The psychiatrist gave me an order for a chem panel, which came back with an blood ammonia level that was off the chart.
The cardiologist finally called back, and the LPN answered the phone. She told me, "This is Dr. X. He says to stop calling him unless the patient is lying dead in the floor." I took the phone. I told him "You won't have to wait very long for that to happen if you don't give me some orders. This man has a blood ammonia level that isn't compatible with life." He apologized, gave me orders and was a lot more cooperative after that. Apparently he had assumed that it was "just" the mental health unit calling, and we obviously wouldn't know when it was appropriate to call a physician.
Making rounds with a physician and going over lab results on a patient that had a supra public catheter... Physicians stated long term catheter patients have chronic orgasms. Lol.
Told the doctor I had to send a resident to the ER for high blood pressure and he says "well did you take a manual?" Like duh lol
The vitals machine may have produced an erroneous BP reading. Therefore, the doc was correct in suggesting/verifying you followed up with a manual BP verification.
The vitals machine may have produced an erroneous BP reading. Therefore, the doc was correct in suggesting/verifying you followed up with a manual BP verification.
Yes, as the OP said: Duh! Because it would be ridiculous to NOT get a manual.
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NutmeggeRN, BSN
2 Articles; 4,743 Posts
Meaning Technical Assistance....