We've all heard weird, wild and even ludicrous things slip out of a doctor's mouth! Provide your quote for this National Nurses Week contest and you'll be entered to win a $250 amazon.com gift card!
Winner will be announced May 16, 2017
UPDATE May 19, 2017:
The winner of the 2017 National Nurses Week Doctors Say The Darnedest Things giveaway is user Racer15 who said:
I had a pt brought by EMS for altered mental status. ER doc is talking to the pt asking her what meds she takes. Starts listing them off and then says "and something to help with my memory, umm, it's called, umm..". Doc looks at her and says "well it's obviously not working", turns around and walks out
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While working triage in the ER one night a male came in and stated that he had a soap bottle stuck in his rectum. I finished my triage and took the patient back to a room. I knew he probably would have surgery so I had him get undressed and was hooking him to the monitors when the doc walked in. He seemed upset about something so I asked him if he was ok. He went off on a tangent about how inadequate our lab was. He went on and on the whole time I was hooking up the pt and starting an IV. The doctor then made the statement "I guess I can get off my soap box now" I thought I would, as they say, bust a gut trying to get out of the room before I died from laughing.
So one night at the start of my 4th shift, a very seasoned surgeon walks into a patients room and greets a man and wife. The husband asks the surgeon how his day was going...my surgeon who is usually quite amiable says...it was great until I got your call..😲...he completes a thorough exam and consents are completed and signed... he turns to me and says, "can you get the gynecologist on the phone for me" and he seemed back to his kind self until she calls back and he says to her..."get your ass in here and assist me as I have to clean up this ******* mess you made in this woman"...I choked....she was there before we even had the patient fully prepped 😂
There was a patient in the ICU that was extremely agitated and had high tolerance to sedatives. The patient was intubated and had a sitter at the bedside as well. The doctor happened to be rounding in ICU when the patient almost extubated himself. The doctors did not want to order more sedation because they said we were just trying to "snow" the patient. After the doctor witnessed the patient's impulsive behavior, he said "Get him propofol, Ativan, versed, or anything... he is fast like a cheetah!"
A patient goes into cardiac arrest and conveniently there was a MD standing there so as another nurse calls for the squad to come running the MD comes over and asks what's going on I reply "her Pulse is absent" his reply "What's her baseline?" My face 😳 Are you Seriously saying that to me....😂
I'm a labor and delivery nurse and one night I was working with one of our docs who is a flamingy gay man. We're pushing with a patient and the dad starts to get lightheaded. I look at the dad and say if you pass out I'm sorry I have no idea what to do with you, I don't deal with memberes. The doctor quickly chimes in "oh don't worry! I can handle a member"! I about died!
Working in the PICU a new Resident was panicking when the child's SpO2 was declining quickly. I came in to check my patient and she is shouting can you get the doctor? Um aren't you the doctor?! 😂 turns out the pulse ox came off...
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mtuckerrn
1 Post
While working triage in the ER one night a male came in and stated that he had a soap bottle stuck in his rectum. I finished my triage and took the patient back to a room. I knew he probably would have surgery so I had him get undressed and was hooking him to the monitors when the doc walked in. He seemed upset about something so I asked him if he was ok. He went off on a tangent about how inadequate our lab was. He went on and on the whole time I was hooking up the pt and starting an IV. The doctor then made the statement "I guess I can get off my soap box now" I thought I would, as they say, bust a gut trying to get out of the room before I died from laughing.