Disrespect & Profanity

Nurses General Nursing

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I've got a couple of burrs under my saddle blanket and am requesting feedback from the allnurses community regarding professional behaviors:

I believe:

Someone should be referred to with their title of Ms, Mrs, Mr, Dr, etc. and their surname until permission is granted otherwise.

Profanity in professional situations is rarely acceptable and if so used, should be in consensual agreement, e.g. "May I speak frankly?"

It gets my goat how some believe they have the freedom to address another or use language that is not becoming to a professional relationship.

My wife, medical nurse Belinda, told me that at Anomaly Memorial Hospital the staff are encouraged to refer to the patients by their first names because it comes across as being more friendly.

In reading some articles on the internet, profanity is condoned and supported in some professional situations because it "releases tension".

"Bullhockey!" say I.

In my experiences, respect is received, even with Salt-of-the-Earth Psychotics, by giving them respect. And that respect, reinforced, has prevented escalating patients from experiencing total meltdowns: The statement, "I expect you to give me the same respect I give you" has caused many an angry patient to take pause.

I think of the multitude of smiles I've received, asking a patient, "May I call you...?" Or: "What would you like to be called?"

Profanity is rarely necessary in a professional situation. The use of profanity can be a sign of loss of control, or apathy. I hear profanity from an acquaintance as their way of saying, "I can say whatever I want with no regard to you".

I truly enjoy using euphemisms to say the vilest thing in the sweetest, most respectful way. Forms of the word "imprudent" has become one of my favs as of late: "You can't fix imprudence" sounds so much more respectful than the mainstream saying. Or: "How imprudent of administration to do that!"

Euphemisms help to take the focus of how something is said and puts the focus on what is said.

What do you think?

Specializes in Dialysis.
2 hours ago, TriciaJ said:

It isn't always the cream that rises to the top; sometimes it's the scum.

I guarantee you in a short time you'll wonder how you stood it this long and you'll actually feel gratitude toward these numbskulls.

In healthcare, 99% of the time, it seems that scum is what rises to the top.

Davey, I think you will be deliriously happy being out of the rat race, especially with this coarona virus with limited PPE

4 Votes
Specializes in Travel, Home Health, Med-Surg.
2 hours ago, TriciaJ said:

What you didn't know was what pretext they were going to use. That's what they had to scramble to come up with.

It would not surprise me to learn that Clark was the one who found this and tattle taled

2 hours ago, TriciaJ said:

These are the kind of people you're dealing with Davey. We've all dealt with them ad nauseum. It isn't always the cream that rises to the top; sometimes it's the scum.

I am afraid this has been my experience also

2 hours ago, Davey Do said:

I've just gotten through reviewing all my posts in this thread, and all are "truthful or based on an honest opinion".

I will stand behind what I've said.

going out with a clear conscious (applies to this as well as a career well done,)..priceless!!

1 hour ago, kbrn2002 said:

I honestly don't know whether to offer my condolences or congratulations on your parting ways with Wrongway. So... I'll go for congratulations!

same here

3 Votes
Specializes in Travel, Home Health, Med-Surg.
1 hour ago, TriciaJ said:

I'm voting for congratulations as well. Although I imagine today has to be a bit discombobulating for Davey. No matter. We all have your back. And welcome to life on this side of the divide. This is where life truly begins...

This will be a definite transition/adjustment but luckily for Davey he is equipped with the knowledge (of a psych nurse) to get himself through the rough patches, although sometimes easier said than done.

Yes, Davey...enjoy the life on the other side!!

3 Votes
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
5 minutes ago, Daisy4RN said:

It would not surprise me to learn that Clark was the one who found this and tattle taled

Actually, Daisy, years ago, Amy Ministrator called Eleanor into the pantry on geriatric psych, in order to speak to her privately, and showed her a photo copied from this website.

Amy asked Eleanor, "Doesn't this bother you?" Eleanor answered, "Well- no. Dave has my permission to use my likeness on the website".

I had a few people, whose usernames I won't mention, Rita, sign permission documentation years ago just in case this sort of thing happened.

Of course, I didn't think this sort of thing would happen but...

...there you have it!

3 Votes
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
6 hours ago, Davey Do said:

When we members here on allnurses discuss patients and other individuals, we change their name, otherwise it would be a breach of confidentiality. PHI is not breached if an actual identifier is not disclosed.

Here is a portion of a recent post I made where I described the patient: "Last night, while straight cathing a patient about my age due to urinary retention..."

Is anybody going to specifically know who this 55-65 year old patient with urinary retention is?

I'm not. I don't even remember their age, let alone their name.

3 Votes
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
24 minutes ago, Davey Do said:

Here is a portion of a recent post I made where I described the patient: "Last night, while straight cathing a patient about my age due to urinary retention..."

Is anybody going to specifically know who this 55-65 year old patient with urinary retention is?

I'm not. I don't even remember their age, let alone their name.

Are they trying to make a HIPAA case? Nice try. They can spend 5 minutes on allnurses and there is no shortage of clinical scenarios being discussed.

3 Votes
30 minutes ago, Davey Do said:

Here is a portion of a recent post I made where I described the patient: "Last night, while straight cathing a patient about my age due to urinary retention..."

Is anybody going to specifically know who this 55-65 year old patient with urinary retention is?

I'm not. I don't even remember their age, let alone their name.

Not only that, I was this days old and this post old when I learned your age so I definitely wouldn't know that patient's age.

I reiterate my previous stance(s): You would only feel some type of way about this thread if you are said subject and there are several of us who think you're bat spit crazy! Said subject being Crookedway as a whole. Next, Nephew Nepotism is a relative of someone high ranking and that's why he's there. If it isn't nepotism, he has something very sinister on Crookedway and they're afraid to rock the boat. Either way, kudos for sticking up for yourself, doing the right thing, and having a moral compass because so many are broken nowadays.

Enjoy your newfound free time, grow your website, and create comic books, or children's books/online forum and make your hobby a financial endeavor. Wishing you the best!

3 Votes
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

What a difference a day makes. I was feeling rather unsettled yesterday, but thanks to you all, exercise, the great outdoors, my garden, and a good night's sleep, I feel good today. I dreamed of old friends and art, of painting logos on a parking lot and making a mailbox look like George Washington's head.

I am done with Wrongway, however, I really like the pardies thereof: "Rightway","Crookedway".

One thing that was unsettling me was the unemployment benefits thing- it's one of the reasons why I chose termination over resignation- they have to prove that there was just cause to terminate me. And I thought "Oh geez, the battle rages on..." and I have to continue to deal with Wrongway.

But then I thought, "Hey- what's the diff? Unemployment or Social Security?" I do not plan to return to full time unemployment, so drawing benefits from unemployment security wouldn't exactly be on the up and up.

I want to deal with Wrongway no more. I want to shake the dust off my sandals and ease it on down the road.

I feel good about this decision and want to give you all who were involved my heartfelt thanks for your input and support.

As Rooty Payne, my brother-in-arms, texted me last night: "It's been one hell of a ride!"

6 Votes
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
15 hours ago, NurseBlaq said:

Nephew Nepotism is a relative of someone high ranking and that's why he's there.

The more I think about this, NurseBlaq, the more I think that you may just be right.

I was told "he tried to apologize to you" as if having to put up with profanity, interfering with patient care & safety, name calling, etc. would not have been a problem, had I graciously accepted Clark's apology. Therefore, since I am the one who did not graciously accept Clark's apology, I am the problem.

There's more ludicrous things that I heard at this short 10 -15 minute meeting, but don't feel comfortable expressing them just yet.

3 Votes
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
On 3/25/2020 at 3:52 PM, Davey Do said:

I was called to a meeting... and written up for creating a safety hazard by propping open the nurses station door. Evidence of the situation was complete with full color photos of the nurses station area.

This entry inspired my good comics website friend, Jenn Vicious to make a cartoon:

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The badge on Jenn's character's cap reads "Dept of Vicious"!

Check out this hilarious detail!

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4 Votes
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
4 hours ago, Davey Do said:

There's more ludicrous things that I heard at this short 10 -15 minute meeting, but don't feel comfortable expressing them just yet.

No matter how ludicrous, I will not have a problem believing any of it. I've seen ludicrous and nothing surprises me anymore.

Anyway, glad you're basking in your newfound freedom. Seriously, you'll look back and marvel at your crap tolerance and wonder how you stood it so long.

5 Votes
Specializes in Travel, Home Health, Med-Surg.
6 hours ago, Davey Do said:

There's more ludicrous things that I heard at this short 10 -15 minute meeting, but don't feel comfortable expressing them just yet.

Oh no, say it isn't so. I guess your admin did in fact see how low they can go!

I hope they didn't drag out more photos.

4 Votes
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