I've got a couple of burrs under my saddle blanket and am requesting feedback from the allnurses community regarding professional behaviors:
I believe:
Someone should be referred to with their title of Ms, Mrs, Mr, Dr, etc. and their surname until permission is granted otherwise.
Profanity in professional situations is rarely acceptable and if so used, should be in consensual agreement, e.g. "May I speak frankly?"
It gets my goat how some believe they have the freedom to address another or use language that is not becoming to a professional relationship.
My wife, medical nurse Belinda, told me that at Anomaly Memorial Hospital the staff are encouraged to refer to the patients by their first names because it comes across as being more friendly.
In reading some articles on the internet, profanity is condoned and supported in some professional situations because it "releases tension".
"Bullhockey!" say I.
In my experiences, respect is received, even with Salt-of-the-Earth Psychotics, by giving them respect. And that respect, reinforced, has prevented escalating patients from experiencing total meltdowns: The statement, "I expect you to give me the same respect I give you" has caused many an angry patient to take pause.
I think of the multitude of smiles I've received, asking a patient, "May I call you...?" Or: "What would you like to be called?"
Profanity is rarely necessary in a professional situation. The use of profanity can be a sign of loss of control, or apathy. I hear profanity from an acquaintance as their way of saying, "I can say whatever I want with no regard to you".
I truly enjoy using euphemisms to say the vilest thing in the sweetest, most respectful way. Forms of the word "imprudent" has become one of my favs as of late: "You can't fix imprudence" sounds so much more respectful than the mainstream saying. Or: "How imprudent of administration to do that!"
Euphemisms help to take the focus of how something is said and puts the focus on what is said.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
On 3/11/2020 at 1:24 AM, Davey Do said:
Rita emailed me today, well, yesterday really:
"Good morning Dave. Thank you for responding. Can we speak at 7:30am or 8:00am on Thursday morning?"
Well, Rita telephoned me and this is a recount of the conversation which I sent to her in an email immediately thereafter:
Ms. Weasle:
According to our short telephone conversation, I understand that our meeting has been postponed "until next week" due to other matters needing to be addressed and your need to "(pull) together some more documents".
I am sending you a verbatim account of a portion of our conversation:
I stated, "This information has been gained through empirical knowledge:
The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) has ruled that if an employee behavior has been condoned by the employer, other employees cannot be reprimanded as a result of the same behavior.
Therefore, an employee may interrupt a professional meeting, interfere with patient care and safety, use flagrant profanity, be privy to Protected Health Information which is not required to be known in order for them to to perform their duties, give erroneous legal advice, oppose an administrative declaration, name call, harass, create a hostile workplace and continue to be employed by Wrongway Regional Medical Center."
Davey Do you have addressed everything I have seen degrade over my career. I was amazed at the number of F bombs that fly in front of staff and patients alike. No one apologizes to pts for their language, but I get it all the time because I don't use that language. Sad environment. I am so ready to step away from bedside and your list is a pretty good start why.
Well, Rita telephoned me and this is a recount of the conversation which I sent to her in an email immediately thereafter:
Ms. Weasle:
According to our short telephone conversation, I understand that our meeting has been postponed "until next week" due to other matters needing to be addressed and your need to "(pull) together some more documents".
I am sending you a verbatim account of a portion of our conversation:
I stated, "This information has been gained through empirical knowledge:
The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) has ruled that if an employee behavior has been condoned by the employer, other employees cannot be reprimanded as a result of the same behavior.
Therefore, an employee may interrupt a professional meeting, interfere with patient care and safety, use flagrant profanity, be privy to Protected Health Information which is not required to be known in order for them to to perform their duties, give erroneous legal advice, oppose an administrative declaration, name call, harass, create a hostile workplace and continue to be employed by Wrongway Regional Medical Center."
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
1 hour ago, MrNurse(x2) said:
I am so ready to step away from bedside and your list is a pretty good start why.
And blame you, for your readiness to step away from the bedside, I do not, MrNurse(x2).
I just have the time and the energy and the drive to take this sad environment on. It's a great situation to experience and study one of my most favorite subjects, human behavior.
There was a really great allnurses member, MrChicagoRN, who years ago said he enjoyed working psych because of "the game of mental chess".
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
1 hour ago, GrumpyRN said:
?????
Thank you, Grumpy.
I told myself that the telephone conference was probably going to be a fact-finding endeavor and my answers should primarily be yes or no. If details were sought, I prepared myself for likely questions by writing down some responses, like cue cards.
When Rita called, I could tell she was on speaker phone. I requested that she take me off of speaker phone and she said she couldn't, her headset was broken. I then asked, "May I know the reason for the postponement?" That's when I fathomed that she either has some priority and/or time management issues and was not prepared for a meeting for which she had scheduled.
I was saving that little piece about the condoned behavior thing for the finality, to use if fitting. When my preparedness had been for naught, I requested, and was allowed, to read my piece.
In perusing some IDES cases, I found that my empirical ruling was similar to many I read, which backed up its premise. I wanted Rita to know that I knew whatever decision is made, Wrongway has to act accordingly to the Unemployment Insurance Act.
In other words, if Clark is not reprimanded for "misconduct, defined as the employer has a reasonable work policy or rule and the employee deliberately and willfully violates", then other employees therefore cannot be reprimanded.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
5 hours ago, Davey Do said:
Well, Rita telephoned me and this is a recount of the conversation which I sent to her in an email immediately thereafter:
Ms. Weasle:
According to our short telephone conversation, I understand that our meeting has been postponed "until next week" due to other matters needing to be addressed and your need to "(pull) together some more documents".
I am sending you a verbatim account of a portion of our conversation:
I stated, "This information has been gained through empirical knowledge:
The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) has ruled that if an employee behavior has been condoned by the employer, other employees cannot be reprimanded as a result of the same behavior.
Therefore, an employee may interrupt a professional meeting, interfere with patient care and safety, use flagrant profanity, be privy to Protected Health Information which is not required to be known in order for them to to perform their duties, give erroneous legal advice, oppose an administrative declaration, name call, harass, create a hostile workplace and continue to be employed by Wrongway Regional Medical Center."
Respectfully submitted,
Davey Do RN
BOOM! I hope you're planning a spectacular retirement party.
Well, Rita telephoned me and this is a recount of the conversation which I sent to her in an email immediately thereafter:
Ms. Weasle:
According to our short telephone conversation, I understand that our meeting has been postponed "until next week" due to other matters needing to be addressed and your need to "(pull) together some more documents".
I am sending you a verbatim account of a portion of our conversation:
I stated, "This information has been gained through empirical knowledge:
The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) has ruled that if an employee behavior has been condoned by the employer, other employees cannot be reprimanded as a result of the same behavior.
Therefore, an employee may interrupt a professional meeting, interfere with patient care and safety, use flagrant profanity, be privy to Protected Health Information which is not required to be known in order for them to to perform their duties, give erroneous legal advice, oppose an administrative declaration, name call, harass, create a hostile workplace and continue to be employed by Wrongway Regional Medical Center."
Respectfully submitted,
Davey Do RN
Bravo DaveyDo, well played!!
I am so sick and tired of the environment that has become only worse and worse over the years. It is so nice to see some people (ie you!) stand up to this nonsense. I tried in my last hospital job but could only go so far as I still needed that job and the (small) retirement it would provide. Like Tricia, I hope you are prepared for any fallout. Although, with your intelligence and homework skills they may not want to rock that boat with you, I sincerely hope this is the case!!
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
Yes Davey I'm cheering you on for the same reasons as Daisy. I went out on many limbs and had most of them sawed off from under me.
This is the #1 reason I don't recommend people starting nursing school after age 40. It's because we start losing our BS tolerance. Bad enough to have rolled with it all along, another thing to be walking into it.
I don't know the administrators you're communicating with but I still love picturing them hacking up hairballs when they read your correspondence.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
1 hour ago, Daisy4RN said:
This is so true! And it is especially difficult when your BS tolerance was low to begin with (as was my case!).
Yes, my nursing instructors used to look at me icily while they told me how glad they were that I'd raised a certain point.
But it goes back farther than that. At age 12 I was once required to write an essay for punishment. I kind of did the Davey thing and was made to have my parents sign it. ?
I generally introduce my self as such "My name is Clara (not my real name). What do you prefer that we call you?" Most people really do prefer to go by their first names, but I've had a few that say "Ms. Jones is fine". Often, they're teachers. Then I get some really odd ones on occasion that's just hard to say with a straight face, "Stretch, Tooter, or Champ" but that's what they go by and what their family call them, so I roll with it.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
8 hours ago, TriciaJ said:
BOOM! I hope you're planning a spectacular retirement party.
Thank you, TriciaJ, but I don't see my retirement starting as a direct result of this.
However, I attempt to plan for the unexpected, so my termination has been considered. In fact, I came home on Monday morning and had a nice talk with Belinda about this whole condoned behavior thing and the possibility that I may get fired over this.
Belinda said, "Well then you'll have the time to bike the KATY Trail!"
I think I would like to work another year or two, but, you know.
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Davey Do
10,666 Posts
Well, Rita telephoned me and this is a recount of the conversation which I sent to her in an email immediately thereafter:
Ms. Weasle:
According to our short telephone conversation, I understand that our meeting has been postponed "until next week" due to other matters needing to be addressed and your need to "(pull) together some more documents".
I am sending you a verbatim account of a portion of our conversation:
I stated, "This information has been gained through empirical knowledge:
The Illinois Department of Employment Security (IDES) has ruled that if an employee behavior has been condoned by the employer, other employees cannot be reprimanded as a result of the same behavior.
Therefore, an employee may interrupt a professional meeting, interfere with patient care and safety, use flagrant profanity, be privy to Protected Health Information which is not required to be known in order for them to to perform their duties, give erroneous legal advice, oppose an administrative declaration, name call, harass, create a hostile workplace and continue to be employed by Wrongway Regional Medical Center."
Respectfully submitted,
Davey Do RN