Dear Nurse That wanted to know if pt had a bm... (venting)

[CardiTeleRN, BSN]

Dear nurse who wanted to know if pt had a bm...

Before I answer, I'd like to know why the pts haven't been repositioned q2h per order, why the pts are constantly developing new PUs with no treatment/barrier protection? (Just because you discover it doesn't mean you're treating it. assessment is followed by treatment), why are scans not being completed per policy? Why are pts' pain not being treated POD1? Why are pts being sent to units for admission with no report from EDs? Why are reports severely inaccurate when I am receiving a transfer? Why were stat labs ordered for a pt with no IV access and no IV team/no nurses available to start an IV/draw labs after I attempted twice? Why did the pt have to wait till next shift? Why didn't any nurse attempt to communicate with pts that speak various languages? Why are some nurses condescending? 

To the nurse that ignored all of this during report and was only concerned about if the pt had a bm, maybe you should have listened when I told you the pt's GI workup was normal and that isn't the admitting DX. but because I know you're worried being as condescending as possible (because she disregarded every important detail about the actual DX) the pt will probably be next down the rabbit hole of the ball being dropped.

Sorry, I just needed to vent. The horror of things that occurred in just one short week and yet, I was asked about something that was so minor and not of concern via labs, scans, pt reports, or to the doctors. Because I didn't give an exact day & time, (it was within the 3 day rule) this particular nurse continued with an attitude as though I was than dirt. 

Please nurses, stop. This is getting out of hand and I hate to see patients suffer due to hateful individuals being blinded by their own pride/ego and trying to find faults and problems in each other instead of our patients so that we can actually help fix them. These issues are nationwide and its becoming disgusting. 

[JKL33]

A worthy rant.

But, for our own mental health, there is a better way to process this: As soon as the words are coming out of their mouth make good eye contact and say, "No idea. It isn't a current issue of concern" and keep right on going with your report. Pay no attention to the less-than-dirt attitude, it has nothing to do with you. It has no significance except to possibly indicate some sort of self-esteem problem.

I feel pretty much nothing with regard to stuff like this. Except: ??. If they knew what I think about their BM and what-side-is-the-IV-on inquiries, they wouldn't ask. Last time someone asked me what side the IV was on, I said, "I don't know but probably the left AC because I put 90% of them there. But if it isn't there it'll be somewhere on the left or right upper extremity."

[FashionablyL8, CNA, LPN]

Cardi, I was recently talking to a fellow nurse who was really upset about this exact subject. I'm sorry you're going through this. It's crazy that simply exchanging information can prompt some people to assert their egos and try to make others feel badly.

JKLL, your comments are always great. I'll remember your responses when I'm giving report and get questions like that ?.

[LibraNurse27, BSN, RN]

On 12/6/2021 at 6:39 PM, JKL33 said:

"I don't know but probably the left AC because I put 90% of them there. But if it isn't there it'll be somewhere on the left or right upper extremity."

LOL! Exactly. Unless it's in a foot or neck, which I will be sure to let you know! 

[Guest 1152923]

I've worked with one of these passive-aggressive, power tripping nurses at every job I've ever had in nursing.  It's not a genuine curiosity or concern for the patient that drives these types, it's a raging inferiority complex and a mean spirited desire to play "big me, little you"!  I like JKL33's idea above.  If these bullies know that they've somehow tripped you up or landed on the one insignificant detail that you don't know, they can gloat and feel good about themselves all day.  It's best to not even engage them, move on, and not play their mind games.

[ladedah1, BSN, RN]

Must be we've had enough of those types on my unit over the years to permanently scar a majority of the staff.  Most of the ones who have been there as long as I have still automatically get all apologetic when they are stating that a patient has an IV, but can't remember what side ?. 

Heck, I don't care where it is.  All I want to know is do they have one and whether it is running or locked.  And if it's been a long night, that's exactly what I'm telling the oncoming shift when they ask where it is... "I don't know. They have one, though.  It's locked off and flushed fine." ? All I know is that it's not worth wasting either of our time trying to figure it out during report.  If they want to know so bad they can open the computer or just go look at the patient. ?

 

[JBMmom, MSN, NP]

I feel you! I've gotten to the point, though, where I'm quite confident that my report is going to provide the necessary information to provide safe and effective care for the next eight or twelve hours. So almost any other questions that are thrown my way will get a "I'm not sure, feel free to check in the chart when I'm finished". 

It's unfortunate that some people have turned report into some sort of battle for non-existent superiority. Over the years I've come to feel a little badly for the nurses that feel this is a priority. And I also feel badly for the patients of nurses that find the trivial issues are of more importance that their actual problems. (Not that constipation is never important, but come on)

[MunoRN, RN]

On 12/12/2021 at 9:43 AM, ladedah1 said:

Must be we've had enough of those types on my unit over the years to permanently scar a majority of the staff.  Most of the ones who have been there as long as I have still automatically get all apologetic when they are stating that a patient has an IV, but can't remember what side ?. 

Heck, I don't care where it is.  All I want to know is do they have one and whether it is running or locked.  And if it's been a long night, that's exactly what I'm telling the oncoming shift when they ask where it is... "I don't know. They have one, though.  It's locked off and flushed fine." ? All I know is that it's not worth wasting either of our time trying to figure it out during report.  If they want to know so bad they can open the computer or just go look at the patient. ?

My default answer when I tell the next nurse they have two functioning peripheral IVs and they ask where there are, is "it's the brightly colored thing taped to their arm", then if I'm feeling extra salty I Google a picture of one for them and then start explaining what a PIV is and how they work, what they're used for, etc.  Usually that's the last time I get asked that.

[mmc51264, BSN, MSN, RN]

Just my 2 cents, I work on a unit that a large percentage of pts go to rehab or other facility for rehab. Almost all will not accept a pt that hasn't had a BM >3 days out. 

As a stand alone question, I agree, but there are some contexts where that is a legit question. (but I agree with the why hasn't A, B, C, D been done is important too)

[NightNerd, MSN, RN]

This thread has been so validating to read. I've been giving report to this nurse in my unit all weekend and no matter how much "homework" I do, there is some question out of left field I didn't anticipate or find relevant. ? I'm not perfect by any means, but I don't think I'm am idiot or a bad nurse or coworker, and I haaaate being interrogated like I am! I could go on and on, but suffice it to say, a few of these scripts will get put to great use next time I work.

[vintagegal, BSN, DNP, RN, NP]

Any job with little oversight fosters prideful egos. And what little supervision we all have is from nurses who haven’t been down in the trenches for while so they are very disconnected. Now this ego is spilling over to patient care, where I’ve heard nurses getting mouthy with patients and their families. I’ve came on the scene before after overhearing some interesting conversations and suddenly nurse ratchet acts like an angel.