cruelest thing I heard a nurse say

Nurses General Nursing

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A few years ago the cruelest thing I heard a nurse say to a patient was:

PATIENT: "If I were thirty years younger I would ask you out on a date"

NURSE: "You are half a man, I would have to say no"

(The patient was an amputee) That is just mean. He laughed but I know it must have really hurt him. I couldn't think of anything to say to make this situation better.

How about you, what is the cruelest thing you have heard?

Specializes in Health Information Management.
True, but sooooo not true in my case scenario.

Certainly not. That's why I said many, not all. There is no situation where telling a rape victim she shouldn't have been drinking so much while she's there for a rape kit is going to be okay either!

I just meant that words and words alone can be very misleading; situation, backstory/history, body language, and tone can all play a major role in determining cruelty versus a joke or a necessary if painful statement.

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Specializes in LTC, med/surg, hospice.

Outside of the rape victim scenario, I haven't really read anything I considered cruel but more so poor taste. I also agree that words can being taken out of context.

I'm sure I've been harsh/firm to more than one patient but it wasn't with negative intention..sometimes it is necessary.

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Specializes in Med/Surg.

There is one nurse I work with who is notorious for stating the obvious, ie. things like for an appy pt with no prior medical history in front of the patient at bedside report "This is _________. He is alert and oriented x3 and his abdomen is tender and obese. He has a tattoo of a sailboat on his left ankle." Seriously?!? If he wasn't alert and oriented x3 I'd expect you to mention it. I can see if someone is obese by looking at them, they are not here for that. I hate when she starts listing off what people's tattoos are of. As an older nurse it comes off incredibly condescending in my opinion as a younger nurse with multiple tattoos (that no one knows I have.)

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Specializes in Oncology/Haemetology/HIV.

A patient is dying of terminal cancer. She is alone. No matter how much pain med that she gets, she moans and cries when she sleeps.

Nurse Sanctimony says, "She must have lived an awful life, and sinned alot...she is seeing visions of Hell, where she is going. Otherwise, she wouldn't be alone."

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

I think it would be the nurse who didn't feel like helping a patient to the commode "who do you think you are? The queen? Just **** in your diaper!"

Then there was the doc who was doing a pelvic on a patient and said "it looks like a cottage cheese factory in there". :eek:

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The most recent one I can relate happened only a few days ago. My wife's mother was on the post-op unit after a 2 level spinal fusion. As my wife was walking down the hall to get some coffee for herself, she passed a room where the nurse was telling an elderly, post-op pt.," if you don't stop being rude, no one is going to take care of you while you're here".

Fortunatley for this POS, it was my wife, not me who was there to hear that. My wife contacted the Charge nurse, Nursing supervisor, the Administrator on call. Oh, and the next day she called the State Nursing Board.

I'd have just thrown the little *****out the 6th floor window.

Just my $.02

Does being elderly allow one to be rude?

Was this elderly person alert and oriented?

Again, what's the context?

If the patient was confused, then the nurse was ignorant.

If the patient was a butt-hole... well, maybe that nurse had already had it up to their eyeballs with the pt's crap.

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Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.
The most recent one I can relate happened only a few days ago. My wife's mother was on the post-op unit after a 2 level spinal fusion. As my wife was walking down the hall to get some coffee for herself, she passed a room where the nurse was telling an elderly, post-op pt.," if you don't stop being rude, no one is going to take care of you while you're here".

Fortunatley for this POS, it was my wife, not me who was there to hear that. My wife contacted the Charge nurse, Nursing supervisor, the Administrator on call. Oh, and the next day she called the State Nursing Board.

I'd have just thrown the little ***** out the 6th floor window.

Just my $.02

Actually, without knowing the pt or the context, how can you really make that judgment? I have taken care of adolescent pts that have are very disrespectful, refuse treatment, etc and have told them to show some respect, etc. Normally a nurse being firm and making it clear that we will not tolerate such behavior will actually make a difference.

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Specializes in LTC, Psych, Hospice.

Several years ago I was training a new RN to work in the field. She had shadowed me the first day in the field and this day she was to do all the assessments and paperwork and I would be at hand if she needed anything or had questions.

The very first pt we go see is elderly, bedbound, w/ a terminal dx of CA. Instead of asking me in the car or refering to her face sheet she asked the pt, "exactly what is it you are dying from?" OMG! Needless to say, she didn't last long in hospice.

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The most recent one I can relate happened only a few days ago. My wife's mother was on the post-op unit after a 2 level spinal fusion. As my wife was walking down the hall to get some coffee for herself, she passed a room where the nurse was telling an elderly, post-op pt.," if you don't stop being rude, no one is going to take care of you while you're here".

Fortunatley for this POS, it was my wife, not me who was there to hear that. My wife contacted the Charge nurse, Nursing supervisor, the Administrator on call. Oh, and the next day she called the State Nursing Board.

I'd have just thrown the little ***** out the 6th floor window.

Just my $.02

Well, call the BON, because I said something similar within the last several months to an a/o x 3 patient with back pain who made two of my nurses cry with horrible statements and threats. When I (charge) went into the room to ask "Is there a problem?" He said "Yeah there's a problem. Why haven't you dropped your pants and sat on my face yet?" I flat out told him if he spoke to anyone like that anymore, no one would come into the room, and that we would only be in the room while he acted appropriately. He said "*** you, I'm paying you! Go get me something for pain, *****!" and I said, "I'm sorry, I can't hear beyond your foul mouth. I'll come back in 10 minutes, maybe you can act appropriately then and I'll be able to understand what you need."

Didn't have a problem the rest of the shift.

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