I looked in here, and other places, and didn't see a sole thread dedicated to the madness that is PDN. As PDN's we go through... Well, a variety of experiences. Let's just say we could write one heck of a book.
So this thread is for:
1. Your wildest, craziest, saddest, happiest, most psycho private duty nursing/homecare stories (Pedi or Adults)
2. Venting about frustrating parents, cases, patients, etc
3. Advice on "should I stay in this case VS that one, etc."
I hope lots of people participate, I feel this is going to be helpful.... We can feel isolated out there in the field. I personally love sharing stories with other nurses. I'll go first, but I'll wait til I get home and can really type out some doozies. :)
Specializes in Home Care, Peds, Public Health, DD Health.
Umm not sure that most parents would see it that way... but I get where you are coming from. and I did see many of my favorite nurses as a blessing and it isnt always paid by fellow citizens... I had home care nursing paid for by my private insurance for 14 years for my now angel who passed. So I know all about the things that Ventmommy is saying. I too had a nurse spill coffee all over the wall and light colored carpet and not clean it up. I did not find it until I was cleaning behind my sons changing table and moving it, YIKES! why would you not clean that up and tell me! I have a carpet cleaner for all the formula spills and food etc. we eventually had to remove and replace much of the carpet.
the worse thing ever, one nurse STOLE all my sons drugs and had not been giving him his meds. He suffered a non stop seizure as a result of valium and pain medication withdrawal and stayed in the hospital for months from complications. She also stole drugs left over from a knee surgery etc. she lost her license but this stole the trust I always had in these nurses. I always let nurses eat, drink, use cell phones, I had no restrictions, take a walk, smell the flowers, do art, read whatever, just do not let my child suffer. As long as he was ok I did not care. And as far as leaving him to go to the bathroom, I have to laugh! I left him all the time, he wasnt going to break! I took showers and went to the bathroom and did all that stuff and he was fine! you need to take care of yourself if you want to care for someone else!
Umm not sure that most parents would see it that way... but I get where you are coming from. and I did see many of my favorite nurses as a blessing and it isnt always paid by fellow citizens... I had home care nursing paid for by my private insurance for 14 years for my now angel who passed. So I know all about the things that Ventmommy is saying. I too had a nurse spill coffee all over the wall and light colored carpet and not clean it up. I did not find it until I was cleaning behind my sons changing table and moving it, YIKES! why would you not clean that up and tell me! I have a carpet cleaner for all the formula spills and food etc. we eventually had to remove and replace much of the carpet.
the worse thing ever, one nurse STOLE all my sons drugs and had not been giving him his meds. He suffered a non stop seizure as a result of valium and pain medication withdrawal and stayed in the hospital for months from complications. She also stole drugs left over from a knee surgery etc. she lost her license but this stole the trust I always had in these nurses. I always let nurses eat, drink, use cell phones, I had no restrictions, take a walk, smell the flowers, do art, read whatever, just do not let my child suffer. As long as he was ok I did not care. And as far as leaving him to go to the bathroom, I have to laugh! I left him all the time, he wasnt going to break! I took showers and went to the bathroom and did all that stuff and he was fine! you need to take care of yourself if you want to care for someone else!
angels mommy
Oh my word, you had a nurse steal meds?!?! How did you find out? How awful!
Specializes in Pediatric Private Duty; Camp Nursing.
My very first case was a girl whose Spanish/English speaking mom nitpicked and yelled a lot. She was very intolerant of the first-day learning curve. I wonder if it's a cultural thing. (Note: not being racist by suggesting this. Lots of cultures have their own ways of doing things. I think I'd call this "generalizing".)
Anyway, after being her verbal punching bag for a few days I told the agency I would not go back to her. It was a hour total of driving for 4 hrs' work each day, not worth it in my opinion.
What would you guys do if you worked a case where your patient had other young siblings (aged under ten) and you heard the mom and patients live in BF swear on a daily basis to those children? Going as far to call them "n" words and "m f-ing babies" among other awful things. I told the agency and they said since its not physical abuse, there is nothing we can do.
I wasn't satisfied with the answer. CPS has already been in the house once that I'm aware of.
Some states have laws about how many people (especially non-related) can be in the same home. Apartment complexes and landlords sometimes limit the number of people. The parents behavior sounds probably won't get the kids taken away. Language alone probably isn't enough. But, I'd watch for emotional/mental abuse.
In those situations, I try to show my pt with my behavior how they should be treated. With that, I hope I set a good example and that they feel safe with me if things get bad. Then if things are bad, hopefully they trust me to ask for help.
I'm don't work private duty but, I work in a residential group home, I have several patients that live together in a house as roommates and I've heard a supervisor tell someone that plugging in our phone chargers is "stealing their electricity"
A friend of mine (not a nurse) went to work at an agency as a caregiver, she was supposed to go for several hours a day and help an elderly man bathe, take him to drs appointments and sit with him if his wife needed to run an errand. Every day his wife would have her do deep cleaning, like scrubbing the floor on her hands and knees, scrubbing baseboards with a toothbrush and all kinds of crazy stuff and wouldn't let her touch the husband. She lasted a week before she quit. The agency told her they had to constantly remind the wife that they weren't a maid service.
A coworker's daughter works in a home with a woman and all of her extended family lives there too plus 2 goats, ducks, chickens, several dogs and the newest addition is a donkey! All in the house!
In nursing school they tell you not to get too attached, to maintain professional distance, but sometimes you don't realize just how close you are getting, until something happens.
I remember going to the Peds floor, to meet my new little patient. My first look at the tiny little one will be forever in my mind. She was so small, and my heart melted when I looked into those beautiful dark eyes. Her mother came into the room and shook my hand. I remember thinking this is going to be a great mom, something about her just made me smile.
A few days later my patient was discharged to home. The first shift I spent putting the phlethora of equipment together that was needed at home, and fending off the brisk case manager who kept making me feel like I was back in school. The mom kept grinning at me, as if to say, it's going to be okay, she can't stay here forever.
Finally it was just me, my patient, and her mom. I just love my new patient, I love her baby smell after her bath. I hug her and kiss her, she's so much fun. Every day she gets stronger, smiles, and eats so well. She's getting bigger, and mom's memories of the little ones heart surgery and subsequent 4 month hospital stay start to fade. She's doing so well, learning all that her wonderful physical therapist is teaching her. Her appointment at the pulmonologist goes well, maybe soon she can get rid of her trach. Laying on her belly still makes her sad, but she rolls over and over, holds her little rattles, and smiles. She has 4 brothers, and her mom waited so long for pink.
She's getting used to being suctioned, just gives you that look like, will you hurry up and get it over with, I have lots to do. The days pass, I am excited to go to work, for the first time in a long time. Her mom and I love to dress her in pretty little outfits , and put her hair in little pony tails that stick up from her head, and we both smile and tell her how cute she looks.
This winter has been mild, we talk about taking her out for a walk soon, when the weather gets warmer. She loves to sit in her pink bouncy chair, and is happy when the vibration is turned on. So quickly she learns how to pull the little pink handle and make the music play. It's like she is in a hurry to accomplish all the things she should be doing. She learned long ago how to roll her foot and pull the wires to make her apnea monitor alarm, and we pretend to scold her when she does it for the 25th time in one day, but usually we just laugh.
One of her diagnosis is Downs, but I study her beautiful face when I hold her, and I don't see it. I study her little hands and don't see the creases either. Work is so fun, I just love taking care of her, and I bring her a red teddy bear with hearts on it for Valentines Day, she's not allowed to eat chocolate yet...ha ha! One day I bring my camera and we take pictures of her, beautiful pictures, she smiles and makes funny faces, and we laugh.
Every day, I bound up the stairs to their 3rd floor apartment, hearing the morning sounds of their day starting. The compressor humming, her brothers laughing at morning tv, and the who is it when I knock on the door. Until the day I am walking up the stairs and wonder why I am not hearing the familiar sounds I hear every day........I start to knock and a police officer opens the door. My eyes fly to her crib, it is empty. I ask what happened, they say I'm sorry, she didn't make it, she's gone. My heart falls to my feet, and it is broken. They ask me questions, what are these machines for, how was she when you left yesterday. I answer, but it's like I'm dreaming, or someplace else.
I leave, go to my car, and sit there, still not believing what I know has happened. Crying I call my agency and tell them the news. My cell phone rings, it's her mom, she says, "This wasn't supposed to happen!, Please come and tell her goodbye." I drive to the hospital where it all began, but this time, I go to the Peds ER. I am ushered into the room, she is in her mother's arms looking like she is asleep. We cry together, tears running down our faces, then her doctors and nurses, who cared for her in the hospital, come in to say goodbye. They too are in shock and tears are falling from their eyes, no one can believe it. I finally go home and cry some more. I get the pictures made we took that day, they are the only pictures her mom has of her. The day of her services, her mom comes running to me the minute I drive in. More tears, and her brothers all look so brave, they are 2, 4, 6, and 16, she was only 8 months old when she died. I just never saw it coming.
I've been doing private duty nursing a long time, but this little one will always be in my heart.
anangelsmommy, ADN, BSN, RN
240 Posts
the worse thing ever, one nurse STOLE all my sons drugs and had not been giving him his meds. He suffered a non stop seizure as a result of valium and pain medication withdrawal and stayed in the hospital for months from complications. She also stole drugs left over from a knee surgery etc. she lost her license but this stole the trust I always had in these nurses. I always let nurses eat, drink, use cell phones, I had no restrictions, take a walk, smell the flowers, do art, read whatever, just do not let my child suffer. As long as he was ok I did not care. And as far as leaving him to go to the bathroom, I have to laugh! I left him all the time, he wasnt going to break! I took showers and went to the bathroom and did all that stuff and he was fine! you need to take care of yourself if you want to care for someone else!
angels mommy