Coworker was fired yesterday.

Nurses General Nursing

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One of my coworkers was fired yesterday. She had been put on suspension a few times and she had been sent to counseling because she has a tendancy to make rude comments to patients. She once told a patient who had been incontinent of stool several times that she was making baby like messes. The patient started to cry and she then told the patient that not only did she poop like a baby, but she cried like one too. The patient died the nest day and the family was devastated that her comment was one of the last things said to their loved one before she became unconscious and went dramatically downhill. She'd had several patients complain about her attitude and that they felt like they were troubling her every time they put their call light on. She also had a habit of pushing a lot of her work off on the CNAs, while she sat and read the newspaper, etc. She'd been talked to about that habit several times. Saturday, she had another patient who had been up to the commode several times. This 98 year old woman had never been in the hospital in her entire life and she'd only been sick enough to see a doctor a few times. The nurse told the patient that if she needed the commode one more time she was going to "stick a plug in her hole so the nurses could get some real work done." The patient was devastated by the comment and the patient's son was ready to kill the nurse. The patient didn't put her call light on for the rest of the shift and the next shift found her in tears with stool and urine everywhere. I don't really know why the family didn't report this to the charge nurse or request another nurse or something. Yesterday, the family called the nurse manager to complain and the nurse was fired soon after. She'd been warned a few weeks ago that if she had any more patient complaints that she would be terminated.

So, here's my dilemma. This nurse called me today and asked me if she could use me as a reference when she applied for other jobs. I told her that I couldn't give her a good reference with a clear conscience. I feel sort of guilty about that. When she does a good job, she does a very good job, but when she doesn't she is nothing short of horrible. I still hate the idea that she is out of work and is probably going to have a tough time finding another job. I know have no reason to feel guilty, but...sigh! Should I call her and tell her I changed my mind and focus on her positive attributes if someone calls or should I stick to my guns? Thanks for reading my vent!

Specializes in Case Management, Home Health, UM.

I wouldn't give this person the time of day. Stay AWAY from her!

Certainly I am concerned about the patient who's lives she has affected, but there really isn't much I can do to undo what she did. I have made a point of giving extra TLC to the patient she insulted on Saturday. I want this poor lady to know what nurses are supposed to be like! I know that management has made many appologies on her behalf. There were many times when we could tell that she was having a bad day that we would ask the charge nurses to reassign her or we would make a point of making her take a break to get off the floor for a while...

What is the hospital's policy? Most businesses have a written policy regarding references. Due to legal reasons only certain people are allowed to give a reference. Usually references may only be given by Human Resources or management. Just say no on this one.

I would suggest you stick to your guns and not give a reference. If you do, and she's hired and continues her behavior, it will reflect badly on you. Not to mention that if she continues the behavior and was hired because of a good reference you gave, you'll have helped abuse more patients.

Yes, she needs help. But only she can be the one who decides to get it.

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Originally posted by cotjockey

Should I call her and tell her I changed my mind and focus on her positive attributes if someone calls or should I stick to my guns? Thanks for reading my vent!

You should call her back and tell her you changed your mind -- IF you would really want this woman to ever be standing over your mother or others and saying those things.

OMG!!:eek: Why, I wonder, did some one not report this woman to the BON for neglect or abuse?? If she did that to my mother, you bet I would file SOMETHING!!

Anyway-stick to your guns-and stay away from her!! IF she does list you anyway, and you get a call...I would simply say that I could not give a reference for her-or answer any questions. That way, you CYA if she gets wierd.

Forget feeling sorry for her-that's like feeling sorry for a bully-or a person that tortures animals! Being unhappy is no reason to treat others that way! I would wager to bet that she had some kind of substance abuse. That behavior is just not normal.

Does it scare anyone else that she will get another job somewhere else, and treat other in the same manner??:o

Nurses tend to enable because we want to help. You did the right thing by protecting future patients.

Specializes in cardiac, diabetes, OB/GYN.

You did the right thing, especially if, without your consent she DOES use you and some facility calls, YOU can tell them that not only did you not give your permission to use you as a reference, but you are entirely disatisfied with her performance as a nurse specifically, and a sympathetic/empathetic person, as well....

What goes around comes around. She is getting what she deserves. Maybe then she will not be so quick to judge the helpless. I actually hope she hurts so much that she learns a lesson and regrets her actions. Those patients can never be apologized to....

If you give her a reference I feel you are contributing to her abuse of patients. she will be back again repeating her actions. Some people do not deserve to be nurses. Her other"good care" can never make up for the unacceptable, abusive ,demeaning and utterly sickening bedside manner.

Wow. I want to present a different spin on this because I am curious who heard this nurse say these things. Was it disgruntled family members? Was it a delirious patient? No shortage of those....and I can't count the times I've 'heard' that a nurse was rude...because patients and family perceive it...not because it happened intentionally. Sometimes firmness and limit setting is percieved as rude and uncaring. So I try to keep an open mind.

I guess I would be careful here...IF I was a direct witness to an exchange like you describe, I would confront it immediately, and/or let a supervisor handle it.

But that's just me, I have trouble messing with someone's livlihood. Unless I am a DIRECT WITNESS to abuse or negligence or malpractice for that matter.... it is all hearsay to me. Too much gossipping and backstabbing already in nursing and I try hard not to be a part of it .

And of course you never have to give a reference if you don't want to...just say you cannot give a reference, or don't return the call. ;)

JMHO.

Specializes in Everything except surgery.

I would be very careful about what I said, other than: "I'm sorry I can't give this person a reference". End of story!

Giving a good reference to this person would be a bad reflection on you. While she may have great attributes, as you said when she's good she's good, well, she's GREAT at mental anquish. NO NO NO NO NO.

Keep nursing in a good light. Report her to the board. I know not what you speak of when you said she's good, but I could care less about someone's ability to do a good IV stick or something to my family member when they're going to shirk their duties and humiliate them otherwise. Goodness, a woman's last day of life was spent with her callousness. How sad.

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