Bully?! Help,I need good comebacks!

[rn865]

I just started working PRN at an urgent care. Im an RN and there is usually only one nurse on duty (me) , a rad tech, lab, doc and front desk. We are usually busy..Lately, I noticed one of the rad techs keep telling me to put patients in a gown so she can do the chest x-ray. Now, Im new so I'm not sure of how they really do things there, but the other rad tech never asks me that, she gets it herself.

Of course I don't mind doing that to help her when she's busy but the thing is, I'm the one always busy since I see ALL patients and she only sees people who need x-ray. I'm mostly in patients' room so I'm not usually the first person the doctor tells if he needs an x-ray (especially chest, since it's not as predictable as extremity injuries) and so it creates a delay because she waits for me to put patients in a gown. Really?!

I asked another nurse and he said that is part of their job. We can help, sure, but they shouldn't be waiting for us to go get the gowns. Apparently, he never gets asked to do that, just me. So now I'm thinking, I might be getting bullied for being new. I really need good comebacks the next time she orders me to do something she should be doing. I'm young and kinda shy and is such an easy target for these, I admit. Please help! I love this job so far and I don't want to lose it.

[Altra, BSN, RN]

This is not bullying.

OP, you have gotten some good examples of direct communication to use.

[tokmom, BSN, RN]

Well, there is the direct approach, or you could say "Sure, right after I do XYZ" in room 4, so you might want to do it yourself" "I have noticed that my fetching the gown slows down the other rooms and those pt's have to wait."

[Meriwhen, ASN, BSN, MSN, RN]

I agree with Altra: this isn't bullying.

I also agree with most of the posters here: this isn't the situation where snappy comebacks, however tempting they may be, will serve you very well. Directly tell him/her that gowning the patient is their task, not yours.

[interceptinglight, CNA]

"The gowns?? Oh, they're in a cabinet over there labeled, *Go-Get-It-Yo-Self* " I kinda stole that line from an episode of 'Scrubs.'

[Patti_RN]

Don't be obnoxious; it escalates the situation. You've said that you're shy and looking for help on this forum, so you're not the type to come up with stinging remarks that you're willing to spew. If you do this and Ms. Tech verbally retaliates, you're going to crumble-- I know, because I don't like confrontations, either.

Your best response is what some others have suggested. Either very politely, yet matter-of-factly, respond with, "The gowns are right over there, if you need help, let me know..." Or take Ms. Tech aside and say, "You know, we both have busy jobs, and I'd love to help you, but I can't keep getting your patients into gowns...."

Make sure you select a response that you're comfortable following through with. If you can't see yourself hissing some snotty remark, for heavens sake, don't do it! Workplace conflicts are difficult, but we all have to deal with them. Allowing her to get away with this just encourages her (and others) to take advantage of you. Take a deep breath and say what you need to say. But, make sure you're comfortable saying it.

[rn/writer, RN]

The others who said this isn't bullying are correct. This is a plain old-fashioned power play--someone giving you the business because she can. She took a read on you and decided (rightly, until now) that you'd rather cave in than stand up to her.

I also agree with the folks who steered you away from making snappy comebacks. Those can backfire badly in the hands of someone who doesn't feel very confident.

You don't have to have a big heart-to-heart talk explaining her job duties. I'll match you dollars to doughnuts that she's well aware of her job description. Since ignorance isn't the problem, information isn't the fix.

The difficulty is that she has seen in you a reluctance to be confrontational and is exploiting that weakness. You can get steamed that she would treat you that way. Or you can look at this as a learning opportunity and determine to get over this fear that is holding you back.

Google "assertive" and "assertiveness" and learn how to say what you want in a firm but non-emotional manner. "You know, Jane, I've helped you out with that in the past, but it's really your job to gown the patients." And just walk away. If she fusses, come back with another dose of reality. "It's part of your job, Jane."

Don't apologize. Don't hem and haw. Don't let her draw you into a verbal tennis match. Just keep repeating the truth with a calm demeanor and walk away.

This is the way adults handle things. Practice beforehand, if you need to. But understand that this is an important life skill that will give you a voice and the strength to use it.

[beeker]

This person is obviously and knowingly trying to take advantage of you. You need to put a stop to it. While it is not bullying, it is the kind of thing a bully does do. Nip it in the bud. BUt make darn sure it is not your duty to gown the patient, and then take care of it. You will feel a lot better once you take care of this. This poster gives good advice! (I would by the way be very tempted to give this rad tech my "crazy eyes" scary look when she demanded I do this, but sometimes you gotta refrain!)

The others who said this isn't bullying are correct. This is a plain old-fashioned power play--someone giving you the business because she can. she took a read on you and decided (rightly until now) that you'd rather cave in than stand up to her.

I also agree with the folks who steered you away from making snappy comebacks.

You don't have to have a big heart-to-heart talk explaining her job duties. I'll match you dollars to doughnuts that she's well aware of her job description. Since ignorance isn't the problem, information isn't the fix.

The difficulty is that she has seen in you a reluctance to be confrontational and is exploiting that weakness. You can get steamed that she would treat you that way. Or you can look at this as a learning opportunity and determine to get over this fear of confronting that is holding you back.

Google "assertive" and "assertiveness" and learn how to state what you want to say in a firm but non-emotional manner. "You know, Jane, I've helped you out with that in the past, but it's really your job to gown the patients." And just walk away. If she fusses, come back with another dose of reality. "It's part of your job, Jane."

Don't apologize. Don't hem and haw. Don't let her draw you into a verbal tennis match. Just keep repeating the truth with a calm demeanor and walk away.

This is the way adults handle things. Practice beforehand, if you need to. But understand that this is an important life skill that will give you a voice and the strength to use it.

[KelRN215, BSN, RN]

As others have said, this isn't bullying. You have also gotten good advice. "A gown? They're on the top shelf over there." That's all you need to say... if you keep doing it for this person, you are enabling their bad behavior.

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

where do the patients put their own clothes/belongings when they're in x-ray? where do they change? where i get my mammo done, there are little lockers about the size of microwave ovens, with keys, and the gowns are stacked there on the benches behind the privacy curtains. i don't see any reason the patients can't do their own disrobing and gowning in something like that. maybe you could bring it up in staff meeting and a small space could be dedicated for that. all they'd need would be the lockers and some curtains. when i change there are 6 lockers per compartment, and obviously we're only in there one at a time and just for a minute to change. problem solved...until the tech has to restock the piles and pull out the bag of used ones.

[CapeCodMermaid, RN]

How is this bullying?

[RNGriffin]

I don't think this is a form of bullying, but a rad tech simply testing the waters with the new nurse. You should be firm ,and inform the rad tech of your duties, and dressing patients for an x-ray is part of the radiologist department's duties.

The best comeback is: We are all working under one company & this is a collaborative effort to ensure the best possible care. With that being said, you shouldn't be delaying work waiting on a nurse to simply dress a patient.

Are there PCTs or CNAs in this facility? If not, the work load should be evenly disbursed.

I have always been great at placing my foot down in these situations. Of course, that could be why my coworkers call me the "Brooklyn Nurse". Not having it!

[VICEDRN, BSN, RN]

Pfft. This is a nonsense issue. Tell the rad tech that since you are new, you discussed the issue with a more senior nurse and it was explained to you that this is in their job description. Add that you know it makes more sense for them to do it since they often know about x-rays before they do. Otherwise, just keep it moving.