my boyfriend CNA/my issues with him dealing with human bodies

[lena11]

Dear Friends

I am not a nurse, but I worked in a Nursing Home as a therapist, where I met my boyfriend. At that point he worked as PT assistant for 8 years, in Union, 2.

He got transwered twice in last 5 months, without his consent, and without any transitional paperwork. The last possition he accepted out of fear for being jobless is a position of male CNA.

I do not want to offend any of the present CNA's over here, but that transition is really getting me now, and interfering our relationship. His job is mostly personal care of the patients, as well as feeding. I still feel ofended that he is seeing all days long naked human bodies, touching them, and as I said It influence our intimate relationship.

I feel as being cheated on in some way.

How do you menage your relationships, does your friends bring that issue ever as obstacle?

Maybe I am a bit traditional, but It is very hard to adjust to his new position in relation with human bodies.

Please, help...I feel it is deeply affecting our relationship.

Thank You

[Bipley]

Okay so what is the big deal? don't pick on someone who cannot spell that is just plain mean.

If the person wasn't a troll, I wouldn't have. Nobody spells worse than I do, but this is a troll. They get no sympathy.

[Thunderwolf, MSN, RN]

The proof is in the pudding if the new member is a troll or not. Trolls typically repeat their behavior on the board to stir up members. It is good to see members modding out for each other. If you believe any member is a troll, report it via the red triangle to the left of every post. The moderators will keep an eye on the posts.

However, for the benefit of a doubt, we also have some very naive folks who join us...who are NOT in the nursing field themselves. This may be a naive member who presents a genuine concern on her part. I have run across a few folks in my practice in the last 20 years who still think this way. So, the appropriate thing is to educate, which we can do.

And personally, being a male RN who has cleaned a lot of back sides, front sides, and sides of sides.....it is just a part of the job...and it is done respectfully. Oh, yeah...I even insert foleys...male and female. Nothing sexual at all. Let's be mindful that patients/residents are there for a reason. It is our job to perform the things that we do. Nothing more.

[Thunderwolf, MSN, RN]

please, no .

wolfie

[Someday-C.R.N.A.]

I would like to make the OP aware of a simple fact:

Dealing with naked people is a part of Nursing (all of Health Care, for that matter), at all levels.

As a CNA, I may have to apply a prescribed ointment to a resident's meatus, but somewhere along the line, a MD or NP had to take a look at said meatus in order to prescribe that ointment.

There is nothing 'sexual' about this AT ALL. I sure don't touch a man's member for pleasure! I do it because He cannot. I do it because I care. I do it because it is my JOB.

If you had a "personal" problem, would you go to your boyfriend, or would you seek the professional assistance of a OB/GYN??

I HATE the intimate care part of my CNA duties (still a student), but I LOVE the opportunity to spend a bit of time with some of these people. I RESPECT my elders. They are wiser than me. Dealing with bowel incontinence is something that I want to get done as fast as I can so that I can focus more on the better parts of these people - their past, their feelings, their stories, their knowledge.

PLEASE realize that Nursing is a great and honorable profession. Be proud that your boyfriend is a loving and caring man, and that he actually makes a difference in other people's lives each and every day he goes to work.

[Thunderwolf, MSN, RN]

I would like to make the OP aware of a simple fact:

Dealing with naked people is a part of Nursing (all of Health Care, for that matter), at all levels.

As a CNA, I may have to apply a prescribed ointment to a resident's meatus, but somewhere along the line, a MD or NP had to take a look at said meatus in order to prescribe that ointment.

There is nothing 'sexual' about this AT ALL. I sure don't touch a man's member for pleasure! I do it because He cannot. I do it because I care. I do it because it is my JOB.

If you had a "personal" problem, would you go to your boyfriend, or would you seek the professional assistance of a OB/GYN??

I HATE the intimate care part of my CNA duties (still a student), but I LOVE the opportunity to spend a bit of time with some of these people. I RESPECT my elders. They are wiser than me. Dealing with bowel incontinence is something that I want to get done as fast as I can so that I can focus more on the better parts of these people - their past, their feelings, their stories, their knowledge.

PLEASE realize that Nursing is a great and honorable profession. Be proud that your boyfriend is a loving and caring man, and that he actually makes a difference in other people's lives each and every day he goes to work.

Excellent post!

[Larry77, RN]

This whole "Troll" term is new to me. Does this just mean someone who is picking an argument?

I had to read the initial post a few times to make sure I was actually reading what I was reading...yikes!

If the initial post was honest, I'm sorry girl but you have some major ISSUES that need to be dealt with. This "problem" has nothing to do with his job IMHO but rather about your insecurity.

[karenG]

This whole "Troll" term is new to me. Does this just mean someone who is picking an argument?

I had to read the initial post a few times to make sure I was actually reading what I was reading...yikes!

If the initial post was honest, I'm sorry girl but you have some major ISSUES that need to be dealt with. This "problem" has nothing to do with his job IMHO but rather about your insecurity.

a Troll is basically someone who posts with the intention of causing a fight/arguement or upsetting people. they have a big wooden spoon and are using it to stir the pot!! at least thats my understanding...

best ignored.

karen

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Human bodies need care when they are in a nursing home.

Nurses/doctors/CNAs, even PT therapists get intimate with people. There are millions of us around, and marriages and relationships survive. Yours will too.

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

You guys are right - a troll is someone who posts something inflammatory or totally off the wall, then sits back to watch people argue. Usually trolls like to start a post, get it going and then they don't post anymore on that thread - this is called a hit and run. Our members have seen through the original poster for the troll that he is. Thanks guys.

[RosesrReder, BSN, MSN, RN]

Best wishes to the OP, hope you can overcome the issue.

[JPD]

Hello,

This is my first post, although I have been reading AllNurses.com's forum for about a year. Nice job moderators, and nice people. :balloons:

Now to the discussion at hand. I am a Male, and am turning 19 the Nov. 30. My girlfriend is going to be a cosmetologist(spelling?), and we just had an argument the other day. As a cosmetologist she is going to be doing pedicure(spelling?) at her school. Now the problem is she is going to have to do it on males too, when they come in. Now maybe it's just my age, but maybe not. I kind of got jealous about the fact she is going to be rubbing another guy's foot/leg, I haven't any idea why I did. I just did. I mean I too will feel kind of cheated when she does this, although she hasn't yet. But then she stated that once a nurse, I will be seeing other females naked. And I understand her part to about it, but still she's touching/rubbing/massaging someone else is all I got out of it.

I think what the member means, or as the "troll" as a few of you said. She might feel like he is going to compare her, to the female he is washing. Since I am in noway a nurse I haven't any idea what a CNA does exactly. But as I am sure he is seeing these females private parts. If my girlfriend has to look at private parts of a male, I too would feel like she is comparing, it would just be difficult because I feel like, she should only be touching/rubbing/seeing my private parts, not any other guy.

Also, if that poster is/was a troll, come on all why say it out like that? What if they had a mental/physical problem and came here because they were to embarassed to ask someone face-to-face.

ALSO! If you all don't mind, not to hijack this thread, but you could leave me comments/suggestions/replys on my little ordeal

Thanks,

JPD

[prmenrs, RN]

The serious answers we gave to the OP are the same ones we'd give you.