Have you ever been referred to as Nurse Ratched? I have, and it really bothers me especially because I know I'm not that type of nurse. I am honest, caring, compassionate, and depended on by many. I was accused of being Nurse Ratched by a family member, because I am "firm and I make people do things they don't want to do." Nurse Ratched was so much more than just firm. She was cold, heartless, controlling, and humiliating. Definitely not someone any nurse wants to be compared to.
I have expressed how I feel about this, as it is an ongoing joke in my family, and I'm at my limit. The alternative could be that I don't give a care, let them eat and drink whatever they want, skip taking their medications, blow off doctor's recommendations, and slowly kill themselves. Then tell them don't come to me complaining of every little ailment and want advice, because I'm Nurse Ratched...remember?
Another option is to show them the softer side: share the sad stories, how you worry about X patient even though they were discharged, how sweet little Y patient made you smile..
..or you can reciprocate by using the insulting terms for their jobs.
You know, depending on how much you like your family.
Just today, my orthodontist asked me "How are things at the office?".
I replied, "Well, I work in a psychiatric hospital so...".
He chuckled his charming little British chuckle and said, "Ahhh, yes. That's right. You're Nurse Ratched then."
I returned the chuckle with a superficial good natured chuckle of my own... because he was getting the drill ready to grind down some teeth and put some other sharp tools in my mouth. I thought it best not to let on that I thought he was being a bit of an ass... and, ahhhhhhhhh, that's right... he must be Orin Scrivello DDS:
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Having seen the movie many times, both before and after I became a psychiatric nurse (I use the film when teaching psych nursing), I would argue that, although she clearly had some unfortunate control issues, Nurse Ratched was "honest, caring, compassionate, and depended on by many." Many people toss the name around as an example of an awful, hateful nurse and/or general-purpose nurse put-down, but, if you actually look at the film (and I wonder how many of the people invoking her name have actually seen the film), she does appear to sincerely care about the wellbeing of the clients on the unit, and make more of an effort than necessary to promote what she perceived as their interests. It was a different time and expectations were different within the psychiatric community, but, honestly, she did a lot better job than a lot of psychiatric nurses at the time did (I've talked to some of the nurses who were practicing at that time).
Since I work in psych, I've been called "Nurse Ratched" more times than I can count over the years. :) I take no offense (although it's usually intended that way, haha).
That's interesting. I've never seen the movie, thus have no idea. But I've heard the "Nurse Ratched" references frequently and always interpreted it as the put down the OP has taken it as. Maybe instead we should be flattered!
Specializes in MCH,NICU,NNsy,Educ,Village Nursing.
I have expressed how I feel about this, as it is an ongoing joke in my family, and I'm at my limit. The alternative could be that I don't give a care, let them eat and drink whatever they want, skip taking their medications, blow off doctor's recommendations, and slowly kill themselves. Then tell them don't come to me complaining of every little ailment and want advice, because I'm Nurse Ratched...remember?
It sounds to me that you are caring for your family and concerned about some of their less than healthy choices. But, it also sounds as though they know which buttons of yours to push. If you've told them once to stop or start whatever it is they need to stop/start to be healthy and they ignore you, call you names, or brush you off perhaps it is time to be silent. That's hard I know when you care for someone, but sometimes it's all you can do. YOU are not responsible for their choices....THEY are. Sometimes just have to reach a point of saying "no more" and go on our merry way.
Specializes in Medical Oncology, Alzheimer/dementia.
Funny. I always thought it was nurse ratchet.
So, did I. But I decided to google it to make sure before I posted this.
What makes it even more annoying is that they call me Nurse Kratchet. I think combining Nurse Ratched and Bob Crachit (character from A Christmas Carol). It's like, if you're going to insult me at least get the name right.
I'm not trying to be argumentative, (but I will be anyway)....was it really acceptable by the standards of the time for a nurse to persuade doctors to perform unnecessary surgery as a means of exacting revenge on patients? Or maybe I interpreted that scene wrong? I will admit, sometimes I wish patients obeyed the authority of nurses and of doctors like they seemed to in the old days. And while nurse Ratched had many fine qualities, they're overshadowed by those large bad ones.
Lobotomies were commonly performed at the time, for good reasons, bad reasons, and no real reasons at all. People who were disruptive in psychiatric facilities and/or weren't responding to other treatments got lobotomized. At the time, the procedure was considered a huge therapeutic breakthrough in an era when there were few effective psychiatric interventions. The physician who invented the procedure won the Nobel Prize for medicine in 1949 for doing so.
Specializes in Medical Oncology, Alzheimer/dementia.
It sounds to me that you are caring for your family and concerned about some of their less than healthy choices. But, it also sounds as though they know which buttons of yours to push. If you've told them once to stop or start whatever it is they need to stop/start to be healthy and they ignore you, call you names, or brush you off perhaps it is time to be silent. That's hard I know when you care for someone, but sometimes it's all you can do. YOU are not responsible for their choices....THEY are. Sometimes just have to reach a point of saying "no more" and go on our merry way.
Thank you for this. My family doesn't just push my buttons, they're on it like patients on the call light.
That's interesting. I've never seen the movie, thus have no idea. But I've heard the "Nurse Ratched" references frequently and always interpreted it as the put down the OP has taken it as. Maybe instead we should be flattered!
I saw the movie long before I even thought about being a nurse and didn't really understand the negative comments about her. She absolutely wasn't therapeutic in some situations but overall I didn't find her to be some horrific villain. Maybe its because I work in psych but I have been called every name in the book and I could give a rip. In some cases the fact that they are at least communicating with me is a positive.
My suggestion for the OP would be to lighten up on the advice to family. They obviously aren't appreciating it if they are making these comments knowing it irritates you.
Thank you for this. My family doesn't just push my buttons, they're on it like patients on the call light.
Am I the only one who grew up with siblings and learned that if you react to the buttons, they will keep pushing your buttons. If you ignore what they say or act like you like it, it won't be fun for them anymore, and they'll stop.
Don't be surprised if it takes a while to extinguish their bad behavior. The longer they've been rewarded each time they pushed your button, the longer it will take for them to learn they aren't going to be rewarded anymore.
If they call you Nurse Kratchet, be pleasantly oblivious to what they are saying.
Alternatively you can embrace the name and laugh and say "Yes. That's me. I went into nursing, so I can order people around." Then laugh.
NurseOnAMotorcycle, ASN, RN
1,066 Posts
Another option is to show them the softer side: share the sad stories, how you worry about X patient even though they were discharged, how sweet little Y patient made you smile..
..or you can reciprocate by using the insulting terms for their jobs.
You know, depending on how much you like your family.