bad experience with a male nurse

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I was in the hospital a few weeks ago and to my surprise I had a male nurse in post-op in telemetry. I was so excited about this. I wanted to ask him so many questions but to my surprise, he was a jerk. He was mean to me and called me names to my relatives. He had the worst attitude I have ever seen in a nurse. My heart sank. I thought "wow, he knows I am going to be a nurse and he is setting this example for me?" Then I thought "wow they eat their young, maybe if he knew if I wasn't going to be a nurse he would have treated me nicer" I am going to write a letter of complaint with my patient survey but it just bothers me. I was even considering going into some other medical profession, it just bothered me. I may be over dramatic but I am just mad. If I was a nurse and one of my patient's was going to be a nurse (male or female) I would take them under my wing until they left at least. Any thoughts on this?

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Specializes in PACU.

Would you care to be a bit more detailed regarding how he was "mean" to you and what "names" he called you?

Some nurses can be a bit grouchy, or even downright mean, but most aren't, whether they are equipped with memberes or not.

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Well the first day I had him he was very cold to me after I had gotten a stent ripped out of my ureter. On the second day he was annoyed I was not walking as much (even though I was pacing in my room alot and sitting up). I asked him for a pillow so I would not pull something when I sneezed and he told my aunt as she left that I was a "drama queen". On the last day in the hospital he got mad at me cause the adhesive on my iv wore off and the iv slipped out. He had iv meds for me but said "you won't be needing this" and angrily tossed it into the bin. He asked me if I had water for my oral medication and got annoyed that I did not. This does not include what the nursing tech said to me when I got the stent ripped out. I was crying my eyes out and the morphine would not work. She said "that's morphine of course it works" She then said "it does not hurt." I told her I had a hard time breathing and she was like "well you are talking right? so you can breath." She wanted me to get up and I was like "I can't it hurts too much" and she said "you have to or I will get in trouble" She found out I was in nursing school and her last bit of useless advice was "you have to be stronger then this if you want to be a nurse" Meanwhile I was huddled over in pain. So yeah that's it.

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Specializes in CTICU.

Open your mouth and speak up for yourself if you don't like how someone is speaking to you. I would not "take someone under my wing" if I knew they were in nursing school... I'd be working and doing my own thing. No reason to be cranky but maybe he had a bad day... I doubt it's anything to do with being a "male nurse". Nurses are just people, not saints. Some people are jerks. Some of those are nurses.

If you are seriously basing your career decision on that, it's a bit of an overreaction.... do what you want to do. Seeing crappy nurses should make you more determined to be a good one if that's what you want to do. I guarantee the nurse isn't thinking about you.. try and get over it.

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I stil want to be a nurse but man that guy was a jackass. I want to be a nicer nurse then he was. It just angers me that he took advantage of me in a way. Every time he did something, nobody was there to witness it. It is not like I was in good condition to speak up. I was not feeling good and felt vulnerable, which is obviously normal for a patient. I think if he pulled this stunt around my parents he would have gotten a mouth full. Maybe I do need to grow up but it is so hard to even want to do anything when you are exhausted after 4 hours of surgery.

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Specializes in Med/Surg.

Just remember that 10% of people in the world are jerks it doesn't matter the profession.

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Specializes in Trauma, Neuro, M&S ICU.

Sounds like he is unsatisfied, and took it out on you. Don't let this influence your perception of male RNs, or RNs in general.

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Specializes in ICU.

It sounds like the guy had a real attitude problem. Smack him on the feedback form. Wish him luck in his new career. He probably has no business interacting with patients, if he treats them as he did you.

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Specializes in School Nursing.
Just remember that 10% of people in the world are jerks it doesn't matter the profession.

I swear some days it feels more like 99.9%, but that is a topic for another thread :)

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Specializes in VA-BC, CRNI.

If you seriously were considering changing professions over an interaction with one person then maybe you are a drama queen? That was a ridiculous statement.

Now it is hard to judge what really happened since these statements are coming only from one individual, one individual who may have had a prior expectation of what a Nurse "should be" all Mr. Florence Nightingale.

To be honest I have to "strongly encourage" my patients with "therapeutic communication" from time to time to get their ass out of bed. If I play nice 100% of the time, 99% of my patients would rot in bed. Getting a post op patient out of bed and walking is vastly more important than you can possibly imagine, you will learn all about it in school.

I know it hurts, I know you don't feel good, I know its hard to breathe but get out of bed damn it! GET OUT OF BED! lol

I am paid to take care of you and advocate for your needs, even if you don't know what those needs are...sometimes tough love is just what the Nurse ordered. ;)

Who knows, maybe he was rude and crude but please don't be so silly as to judge the entire profession on one individual in one situation.

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Nursing is very stressful and maybe he was taking his frustraton out on you - or - maybe you were just overly sensitive due to the fact that you were post-op and hurting (could be a little of both).

I would not base that one incident on whether or not you persue nursing. Good luck on whatever you decide.

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Specializes in Nephrology, Cardiology, ER, ICU.

I wouldn't base my choice of career on one interaction. I have had bad days myself when I look back and realize that my choice of words or tone of voice wasn't the best.

Reconsider....and I hope you are feeling better.

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