backstabbed at work

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I am trying to get a perspective on how to deal with situations like this in the future. I was working with a preceptor who just had it in for me. I don't know what it was that she didn't like about me but she treated me horribly and constantly tried to make snide remarks to me. She talked down to me and needless to say we didn't work together for long. I found out that behind my back she was writing all sorts of notes on me on just plain old notebook paper. Not the preceptor evaluation sheets- notebook paper, about just random things she didn't like about me in such a format as "RN did ...." And they were small random situations that had nothing to do with nursing. She twisted these things around to try to make me look really bad. I found it very strange and she gave this to management without even telling me. Why are there nurses out there like this? What can I do next time in this situation to alleviate myself in the most professional way?

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Specializes in ICU/ER.

I find it even worse that mgmt told you about it---meaning they believed her!!! They should have just dismissed that and educated her on the role of preceptor.

I dont have any advice on how to deal with crazy people---if I knew that I would put it in a book and make a million...my only thought is go in and do your job to the best of your ability, document everything in detail. Offer to help others when you have time and be a good team player.

In other words be the best that you can be and hopefully raise the bar higher and hopefully others will follow your suit.

As far as what to say to mgmt about the notebook paper notes she turned in, I would just say something along the lines of "yes Suzy and I didnt see eye to eye on certain things but I didnt think it was necessary to involve mgmt---"

Best of luck----with back stabbing like that--good thing you work in a hospital~~~hahaha I had to throw that in as that was the 1st thing that popped in my head when I saw the title of your post.

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She did it, because she's a tattletale and alot of management people like tattletales......that doesn't make what she said about you true....they just like to do this sort of stuff and management people sometimes like it.

If it were me, knowing what I know TODAY, and having had experience with this the past 28 years, I would leave if I were in your shoes. I would not stay there. You will always be in hot water, you'll never win. That nurse, has already got you off on the wrong foot with your NM and it will never end.

Of course, this is just my opinion, as I don't know all the details of your situation, but this is not good for this to be happening at the very beginning.

To not even give a new nurse some kind of encouragement and try to help them start off in a good light, is just beyond me.

I guess people like your preceptor would rather work short handed, as this kind of activity runs off nurses.

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"Let your enemies in your fight bring out the best in you".

"Let your enemies in your fight bring out the God in you."

Consider your foes nothing more than "confused friends."

quoted from an 18 r. old presidential nominee supporter.

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Only the best get bullied.....

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Specializes in Licensed Practical Nurse.

only the best get bullied.....

:rolleyes::rolleyes: and indeed i believe that!!, birds of a feather flock together, the bullies never bully eachother they bully the ones who stand out above the rest and have great potential! what can i say there are downright even people out there, they dont have to know you personally and you dont have to know them personally for them to hate you! i actually feel sorry for the people that dont like me for no reason at all! it only highlights their insecurities, my heart truly goes out to them because they look so foolish and cant even realize it, sad, honestly!! dont worry about those people! why do people alwayz forget that what goes around comes around! i've seen people like that get the favor returned to them. karma is real!!:stone

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She did it, because she's a tattletale and alot of management people like tattletales......that doesn't make what she said about you true....they just like to do this sort of stuff and management people sometimes like it.

If it were me, knowing what I know TODAY, and having had experience with this the past 28 years, I would leave if I were in your shoes. I would not stay there. You will always be in hot water, you'll never win. That nurse, has already got you off on the wrong foot with your NM and it will never end.

Of course, this is just my opinion, as I don't know all the details of your situation, but this is not good for this to be happening at the very beginning.

To not even give a new nurse some kind of encouragement and try to help them start off in a good light, is just beyond me.

I guess people like your preceptor would rather work short handed, as this kind of activity runs off nurses.

I am totally agree, this is how I started out my nursing career, with the whole unit running to manager to update her on what I did or did not do. I was telling myself I have to be stronger and prove myself to them, and then they will "let me in"...what a naive fool I was, ended up leaving anyway, but suffered a major blow to my confidence. Now I know to run as fast as you can, this situation will only get worse.

Sorry.

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NuHappyRN,

I am sorry you find yourself the victim of this type of smear campaign. I have seen this happen many times, have been the victim once or twice myself, so I can only tell you to leave this job before real damage is done to you, your license, and your career. This is a toxic work environment, promoted and supported by management of all levels. It will not get better . Changing preceptors or units will not change what this nurse has set into motion. No matter the circumstance you will be looked at by management as a "risk". Save yourself a lot of trouble, stress, and turmoil, get a new job.

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Specializes in Telemetry, Med Surg, Pediatrics, ER.

I am so sorry you have experienced this. I went through the same thing. I have to agree with the advice from barefootlady. You should start looking for another position. I wish someone had given me the same advice. I stayed and endured it shift after shift. It does not get better. In my situation, management played the game with my preceptor. The only way to win in a situation like that is to get out.

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Specializes in neurology.

I am soooo sorry you had to deal with that! I don't know what to tell you except hang in there!

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I am totally agree, this is how I started out my nursing career, with the whole unit running to manager to update her on what I did or did not do. I was telling myself I have to be stronger and prove myself to them, and then they will "let me in"...what a naive fool I was, ended up leaving anyway, but suffered a major blow to my confidence. Now I know to run as fast as you can, this situation will only get worse.

Sorry.

That is exactly what I went through. By the time the bullies were done with me I had lost my position, my self confidence and my reputation was seriously damaged. I had to stay with the organization while I completed nursing school but I am hitting the door ASAP. I won't work for this organization as a nurse because these evil twins would go after my "new" license to prove that they were right.

Bullies are truly evil. :angryfire

PS I do believe that karma will catch up to them in spades....

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So sorry you had to endure all this, i find it ironc in our "caring" profession nurses tend to snipe and bully the worst. Before Nursing I worked with all guys in a male oriented field.. Was so looking forward to being with women.. Now I know we really are not the gentle sex..

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