Assertive versus Bullying

[SunDazed, BSN, RN]

Lately, I feel like our managers are getting close to fudging the line between being assertive and being bullies. I understand that they are under pressure to provide a group of nurses for the shared governance committees, and many of our staff have just said no.

The other day one said something to the effect of "if you aren't interested in pursuing additional professional education and participating in development, then you might as well give up your license... after all you basically pledged to do this when you took your nursing oath."

What?!? Being a compassionate bedside nurse and following up on licensing requirements isn't enough? Now I must glow like the lantern?

It makes you wonder... what is their goal?

When I was in nursing school I remember seeing pictures of ER nurses in big cities that were allowed to have blue hair and tattoos showing. Not that I want to have blue hair... and none of my tattoos show... but I thought I was sort of entering a field that allowed a little bit of individuality. As long as you did the job and did it correctly and compassionately... and made a connection with the patients...

Right now the most favored nurses in our unit are former cheerleaders between 26 and 32 who will write whatever the boss asks them to write... say whatever the boss wants them to say... and then when the boss isn't looking break the rules they don't regard... the main one being not having your cell phone on the floor. The expectation is you will leave it in your locker. Yet, they hide in the back room to chart and regularly have the phone out texting away.

But my original thoughts were about being coerced into joining committees... you know pulled into the office and put on the spot to submit an application? How do you say no when you still have no idea what the review process is like? I got a taste of it one day when a manager pulled me into discuss a break issue and suddenly is digressing to discussing my flaws as reported by barely familiar coworkers? Really?

Then the cracks start to show... because they now realize you may not play every game their way? Just because I was coerced onto the committee, doesn't mean I will participate in a way that doesn't meet my own personal idea of integrity. You did like that I used the word integrity in my application, right Mr Manager? I don't just say it.. I try to live it.

Maybe any one not in the former cheer camp will not play along? Bullied? Yea... well.. I will just keeping watching the job positings. It doesn't matter how good the pay if the enviroment is threatening. I don't know about you... but varsity cheerleaders at my high school could sometimes be mean girls.

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

I'm not seeing where the bullying is here. Uncomfortable and not liking your coworkers and management is not being bullied.

[NanikRN]

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The other day one said something to the effect of "if you aren't interested in pursuing additional professional education and participating in development, then you might as well give up your license... after all you basically pledged to do this when you took your nursing oath." .[/quote

While I think thAt person was using quite a bit of hyperbole, s/he does make a legitimate case.

Medicine is not stagnant ; it is a dynamic and ever changing area of practice. And that does require continued educational/professional growth from us

However, there are multiple ways to ensure professional development and one does not have to be on a committee to fulfill that goal.

[morte, LPN, LVN]

being confronted with signing up for a committee, getting a "talking to " when originally approached about something else, the OP did say (s)he felt the line was being "fudged" .....

I'm not seeing where the bullying is here. Uncomfortable and not liking your coworkers and management is not being bullied.

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

The consequence of not becoming involved in unit-based governance activities? You'll just have to accept whatever your co-workers decide to do. If you're OK with that, it's all good.

Personalities are different. Some folks naturally gravitate to positions of influence and leadership at work, while others just prefer to expend their energies in non-work aspects of their lives. Different strokes, right?

[RNperdiem, RN]

The cheerleaders can teach you many things about office politics. Pay attention and you might learn their survival skills. Being liked is as important as being competent in the working world. Unfair but true.

[morte, LPN, LVN]

so lying is ok?

The cheerleaders can teach you many things about office politics. Pay attention and you might learn their survival skills. Being liked is as important as being competent in the working world. Unfair but true.

[SunDazed, BSN, RN]

I'm not seeing where the bullying is here. Uncomfortable and not liking your coworkers and management is not being bullied.

hmm. it is not that i don't like coworkers... it is more that i don't trust them. aren't nurses supposed to be the most trusted profession? i guess it is all about maintaining a front, as long as no one knows what really goes on?

as far as management goes, there is often very subtle aggression. is that not bullying?

[SunDazed, BSN, RN]

The consequence of not becoming involved in unit-based governance activities? You'll just have to accept whatever your co-workers decide to do. If you're OK with that, it's all good.

Personalities are different. Some folks naturally gravitate to positions of influence and leadership at work, while others just prefer to expend their energies in non-work aspects of their lives. Different strokes, right?

Right. So how would management and the organization benefit by coercing people to join the committee?

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

hmm. it is not that i don't like coworkers... it is more that i don't trust them. aren't nurses supposed to be the most trusted profession? i guess it is all about maintaining a front, as long as no one knows what really goes on?

as far as management goes, there is often very subtle aggression. is that not bullying?

No, that is not bullying. It may be bad management, and you may not like it or be able to feel comfortable with their style, though.

[SunDazed, BSN, RN]

The cheerleaders can teach you many things about office politics. Pay attention and you might learn their survival skills. Being liked is as important as being competent in the working world. Unfair but true.

I don't think I am not liked. I just keep it friendly and superficial... always helpful and willing to lend a hand. I really care that the patients are well served so I will work with anyone to get that done right. It does take folks a while to warm up to me... I sort of have a serious face... and it puts some off. I am used to that.

I agree I am not great at office politics. I think agreements should be honored and rules evenly enforced and fairness and justice for all! Managers using ambiguous terminology as an escape route... coworkers who complain about working short but call in sick when everyone knows they are out of town... Any of these and you can be a success? That isn't not balancing competence and likeability... it is trying to have integrity on a slippery slope of compromises...

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

Self-governing committees mean one thing to managers--that ya'll won't go union.

Also, it is like those business models that one is an independent contractor, who gets others to become independent contractors, then build teams---at the glowing accolades of the original person in.

I want to go to work and do my job. That the DON wants to become magnet is not my concern.