Are there any introverted/shy nurses that can give me some advice?

sleepRN, ADN, BSN, RN · Jun 3, 2012

I am introverted and shy. I have learned to fake confidence in new situations when I felt nervous. I would do some deep breathing, then jump in to a situation with my fake confidence. I would pay attention to my nonverbal cues: stand tall, eye contact, articulate, facial expression, etc. Funny thing happened...I started to feel real confidence after doing this for a long time. Also becoming more comfortable with my nursing skills helped.

I've been a nurse for 5 years. I'm still a shy person underneath it all (most people wouldn't know it), but I'm a confident nurse!

sauconyrunner · Jun 3, 2012

If you are finding it hard to interact with your patients, and faculty etc, and it is something that perhaps has been noted by faculty, then you probably need to work on it a little. and YES you can be a good nurse, but you may need to put a little effort in!

I suggest that you volunteer at a nursing home or hospital, or get a job as an aide if you can. Heck you could volunteer with the Special Olympics, or an after school program, or just about anything..or join toastmasters if that appeals...the more you expose yourself to uncomfortable situations, the better you get at handling them, and the less your anxiety will be. I was a very very shy person, and remain so, but through a lot of practice, I now feel a lot less anxious about interacting with patients or family or other co-workers.

CheesePotato, BSN, RN · Jun 3, 2012

I'm a very shy person and I get anxious and nervous with new patients/classes/surroundings. Are there any introverted/shy nurses out there that can give me advice? Can I still be a good nurse after I graduate??

You can still be an amazing nurse after graduation.

For me, it was about digging deep and finding my confidence, learning to let things roll off my back and realizing there are things I can control and things I cannot.

It was also about learning to not avoid things that made me cringe. I purposefully put myself in, what are for me, uncomfortable situations so I can work on constantly keeping a handle on my social anxiety and introverted nature--things like acting/singing on stage, playing solos in band/orchestra and joining Toastmasters.

What stood this on its ear for me was the day I got my sweet baby, Kid. She is my grounding force, my working partner and therapy dog. People come up to me to talk about her and interact with her and as a result, I find myself relaxed and able to focus.

As of now, I still have my twinges of anxiety and moments were a dark corner sounds really inviting, but I have developed my coping mechanisms to deal with it.

In the professional setting, I refuse to allow my anxieties to cross the threshold with me and I redirect that energy from nervousness to productivity.

.....feels weird to talk about this. Don't think I ever have before. C'est la vie.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Jun 3, 2012

Very wise words, as always, CP. :yeah:

FWIW, there have been studies done that show the OP and others have lots of company! It seems counterintuitive, when you consider how often we have to meet new people and deal with new situations---not to mention the teaching we have to do---but the truth is, introverts make up the majority of nurses, and extroverts like yours truly are the odd ducks

nursynurseRN · Jun 3, 2012

Eventually you will get used to it. I was the same way at first. When i first started out on the floor I would do a quick peek in the room before i introduced myslef later (am shift most people would be asleep). Most of the time this gave me chance to see what the paitnet looked like and gave me an outlook on if they were going to be a "bad" patient or not. During report I would always ask if they were a nice patient, that way I could be mentally prepared for a mean patient. eventually rhe shyness went away.

Morainey, BSN, RN · Jun 3, 2012

I got over being shy really quickly. Sometimes with your time constraints you don't have time to tiptoe around issues. It comes easier with practice, now I feel like I can talk to anybody about anything and be direct with my patients and coworkers when it behooves me/them to do so, without feeling like a jerk.

elkpark · Jun 4, 2012

I started out the same way. One thing that I found helpful (although I realize it sounds funny and kinda cheesy) is to think of someone I admire, a professional role model, who performed in clinical situations the way I would like to, and do a sort of "impression" of that person in those situations -- talk to people and conduct myself the way I knew that person would. That helped me get "over the hump," and, over time, it became less about imitating the other person and more about being myself.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Jun 4, 2012

I sometimes think that my personality and temperament are not compatible with nursing, although I usually get along with my patients and family members. Although I am an introvert, I notice that I am becoming more and more emotionally detached as the years pass by. It is hard to be nervous when I have detached myself from the situation emotionally. I usually get the job done by putting on a performance to 'fake a connection' with patients and families.

People tend to describe me as quiet. I'm detail-oriented, task-oriented, and usually prepare a "to do" list before the start of each shift. I am very introverted and do not enjoy passing the breeze with small talk. I prefer discussing topics that are academic, worldly, or intellectually stimulating to me. However, I will engage in small chatter if it makes the patient or visitor feel more at ease. My affect is sometimes restricted or blunted.

I am very serious, occasionally uptight, lack a sense of humor, and I do not smile much because my smiles frequently come across as fake. I'll be the first person to admit that my interpersonal skills need some work. I am outwardly calm, thoughtful, and very non-confrontational. Confrontation disturbs me greatly. I prefer one-on-one interaction versus mingling in a large group of people. I also prefer night shifts due to having less people around.

I am definitely not a charmer. My best friend, who is also a nurse, knows how to charm people by telling them what they want to hear, flattering them with phony compliments, telling them little fibs and lies that will make them feel good about themselves, and generally "playing the game" to be viewed favorably by others. However, I cannot bring myself to the point of kissing another person's butt just to get that person to think fondly of me.

prettymica, ASN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN, APRN, NP · Jun 4, 2012

I took a job in sales a long time ago to prepare me to interact with people and the multiple personalities.

CorazonDeOro · Jun 4, 2012

I tend to be introverted and shy as well. When I started clinicals in nursing school I was TERRIFIED of pts. I remember having a classmate go with me to do my first assessment I was so scared. What helped me was taking a job as a nursing assistant. I was still really scared but I kind of got used to meeting pts and dealing with them. It DOES get easier, the more confident you become as a nurse the easier it gets. I try not to let other RNs affect my attitude toward the patients. I always get report that at least one patient is "rude/crazy/noncompliant/verbally abusive/etc" but I try to ignore the opinion of that nurse and not to let it affect me. If you go in to that room scared the patient will sense it and may be really difficult for you. Just go in with a smile and introduce yourself, the rest will come with time.

PennyWise · Jun 4, 2012

My only advice would be not to push too hard to be something you are not. If you suddenly try to pretend you are outgoing when you are not, it could come off poorly.

I don't see shyness as being something that has to be overcome. There are more than a few patients who prefer this over a nurse who is jolly or theatrical/loud.

In short, its the same thing they tell people to do on a date that has them nervous: Be yourself.

We all float down here.