Horrible LTC & boss, and a recurrence of cancer

  1. hi everyone

    well, i cant take it any more. i'm tired of the way this nursing home is run. there's no other place around here to go, and i am being pushed out oh so wrongly. being "written up" for days i wasn't even scheduled for calling in, being written up for things i never did, etc.
    i work only one day per week and every other weekend, but even those days, there's a nurse who always works on day shift who leaves me a whole list of stuff she "didn't have time for". like her treatments "oops. i forgot." or her admission that came in at 10 am. "i didn't have a chance to do any of it, cause, ummmm, well, i was busy." YEAH. RIGHT!! doesn't matter though, cause our brand new DON has this "nurse" as a pet. Even interrupted us during shift change to give said nurse a large box of chocolates, with a note saying "to the best RN at *******, I couldn't do this without your effort and teamwork". VOMIT...
    this unit has only two nurses left. everyone else (unit manager, three full time afternoons, two full time midnights, a handful of part timers) left. they think they own the place, and i can't stand their laziness any more.

    i had a rough year last year with health issues, and missed a ton due to FMLA. now this year, i cut my hours way back, but i've been undergoing radiation and surgery for uterine Ca, and now i just found out yesterday that two of my lymph nodes biopsied were positive. i don't know what i'm going to do now. i had my good friend pick me up some FMLA papers so i could get them filled out, just in case, and the DON said "those better not be for (me), cause she won't be approved for any more time". i don't know what to do. i surely am tired of dealing with this place, but there's nowhere to go. and now with this new development of my Ca, after i thought everything was done, i am heartbroken. the DON doesn't care, nor does anyone else. i've worked there almost 6 years now, and i've worked my butt off, all for nothing now.

    i just want to go lay in my bed and never get up again.
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  2. 11 Comments

  3. by   KIAN
    rehab nurse, I am so sorry for your plight. You must be so overwhelmed. Please take one day at a time. The ones who left that mud hole appreciated you. We one this board appreciate you, I appreciate you. Good nurses who care are so hard to find.
    That said, think hard about what is important to you and put your plans in that direction. One thing at a time. You are most important.
    Kian
  4. by   SuesquatchRN
    *sigh*

    I recently lost a job. The DON's DIL was the other nurse on with me when the alleged problem occurred. Believe me, I know from pets.

    I did something I've never done before - I got a lawyer. I was being screwed over on a reference and COBrA benefits so I did a little research, found out I was in the right, and $200 later and two telephone calls from my attorney all of my problems have been resolved.

    If they give you any trouble at all about leave to which you are entitled under federal law get a lawyer. There are a lot of decent, kind ones with hearts who will help you for very minimal fees.

    And my thoughts are with you on the cancer.

    Let us know who things work out.
  5. by   Daytonite
    Yow! Your priority right now is to take care of your health. I wouldn't worry about getting FMLA. If I'm sick sick and I need to be out of work, then I call off and stay off until I'm ready to come back if I have a boss that's not going be cooperative. It's as simple as that. What's the boss gonna do send a car to my house and demand I come in to work? FMLA is just a fancy way of getting a leave of absence and protecting your employment as well as some benefits. Before FMLA, people just called in sick and stayed out until they could come back to work. Some places wanted you to officially ask for a leave of absence. Nice employers kept your job open. Nasty ones took you off the books--and FMLA was born.

    If you end up not being able to work and this DON is giving you grief about giving you FMLA I would say just call off and let her figure out what to do. If you can also get a letter from your doctor to give her stating that you have to be out of work and why, all the nasty comments she's making about not approving FMLA don't mean squat. She'd be an absolute fool to try to fire you with that kind of written evidence in front of her. It would most likely force her to send the FMLA papers your way. Hee! Hee! She will get bugged by the office people as to what to do about your status with the company. The payroll people will want to pay out any vacation and sick time you have accrued no matter if you have FMLA or not. Don't confuse her bad attitude with her obligation to do the right and lawful thing. She has a boss to answer to as well. If she violates your rights, the boss will be all over her--you just won't know about it.

    You should have no problem getting a doctor's excuse to return to work. If they're having a problem keeping nurses on staff, it doesn't sound like they would be very smart not to put you back to work when you are ready. The only kink in the chain here would be to be careful with them to see what your employee status is if you have to be out of work. You need to protect any medical insurance benefit you have through this company and your access to COBRA benefits if they decide to terminate you. So, keep the lines of communication open no matter how disagreeable it might be. You need to be aware that if they terminate you, they must inform you of your COBRA rights and benefits in a timely manner, but that doesn't mean that they have to be nice about it and they could wait until the very last days they have to notify you to do so. The good thing might be that you would be working with office people rather than the DON with regard to COBRA benefits.

    I would just like to suggest that you keep copies of any doctor's letters or excuses and any communication (letters) so you have them. The same goes for any write-ups or disciplinary actions against you. I'm sorry you're having so much turmoil now. You really don't need this at this time.
  6. by   UM Review RN
    Rehab nurse, I cannot imagine how you must feel at this point, but let me offer an ear and a hug. It's not much and it won't solve the problem, but I just want you to know that we're here for you.:icon_hug: :icon_hug: :icon_hug:
  7. by   muffie
    take care of yourself dear

    good luck with work
  8. by   Simplepleasures
    Rehab Nurse, did you get my PM from a couple of days ago?
  9. by   Liddle Noodnik
    Quote from rehab nurse

    i had a rough year last year with health issues, and missed a ton due to FMLA. now this year, i cut my hours way back, but i've been undergoing radiation and surgery for uterine Ca, and now i just found out yesterday that two of my lymph nodes biopsied were positive. i don't know what i'm going to do now. i had my good friend pick me up some FMLA papers so i could get them filled out, just in case, and the DON said "those better not be for (me), cause she won't be approved for any more time". i don't know what to do. i surely am tired of dealing with this place, but there's nowhere to go. and now with this new development of my Ca, after i thought everything was done, i am heartbroken. the DON doesn't care, nor does anyone else. i've worked there almost 6 years now, and i've worked my butt off, all for nothing now.

    i just want to go lay in my bed and never get up again.

    In my case God just plucked me out of a baaad situation, since I couldn't do it for myself. Sorry you are going thru this

    Any advice would probably be trite or something you've thought of. If it's ok I'd like to put you on my email prayer list, let me know!
  10. by   Ginger35
    Dear Rehab Nurse,

    I am so sorry that you have to go through this. Right now, it is time to concentrate on YOURSELF!!! I know that you need more support from the managers and leaders from your facility - but - it looks like they don't value someone that has some time and experience in at this facility.

    As someone that has went through an illness and the hassles / rigors of the job - take advantage of your rights as an employee. Go by the book... Then, once you have your medical issues under control and things have not changed -(I mean if this new DON is still there) - I would not continue to work under her "leadership" (or lack thereof).

    Take care of yourself,
    Ginger
  11. by   gitterbug
    I am so sorry. I have prayed for you. Speak to an attorney, speak to your physician, but mostly speak to HIM. Is there any possible way to obtain short term disability? Just a thought.
  12. by   withasmilelpn
    I am so sorry Rehabnurse! I will keep you in my prayers. I do think the lawyer is a good idea. Check out the family medical leave act. There are many different ways you can use the time. It doesn't have to be taken all at once and can cover you if you need to call out periodically. God bless.http://www.dol.gov/esa/whd/fmla
    Last edit by withasmilelpn on Jan 12, '07
  13. by   jetscreamer101
    I'm so sorry about your medical woes.

    Do a google seach for both FMLA and ADA regulations, rights, etc.
    An employer cannot refuse to give you FMLA time off unless you've already used your alotted time, or medical necessity for leave isn't proven.

    Also look up the ADA laws. Many people don't realise that they can be coverered under the ADA laws.

    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Q. What practices and activities are covered by the employment nondiscrimination requirements?
    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A. The ADA prohibits discrimination in all employment practices, including job application procedures, hiring, firing, advancement, compensation, training, and other terms, conditions, and privileges of employment. It applies to recruitment, advertising, tenure, layoff, leave, fringe benefits, and all other employment-related activities.

    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Q. Who is protected from employment discrimination?
    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A. Employment discrimination is prohibited against "qualified individuals with disabilities." This includes applicants for employment and employees. An individual is considered to have a "disability" if s/he has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities, has a record of such an impairment, or is regarded as having such an impairment. Persons discriminated against because they have a known association or relationship with an individual with a disability also are protected.
    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The first part of the definition makes clear that the ADA applies to persons who have impairments and that these must substantially limit major life activities such as seeing, hearing, speaking, walking, breathing, performing manual tasks, learning, caring for oneself, and working. An individual with epilepsy, paralysis, HIV infection, AIDS, a substantial hearing or visual impairment, mental retardation, or a specific learning disability is covered, but an individual with a minor, nonchronic condition of short duration, such as a sprain, broken limb, or the flu, generally would not be covered.
    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The second part of the definition protecting individuals with a record of a disability would cover, for example, a person who has recovered from cancer or mental illness.

    For ADA stuff, try the job accomodation network. You can get lots of info there. There is a list somewherethere there about what "reasonable accomodations" might be. Some are extended leave, flexible scheduling, all kinds of things. Some may pertain to your situation.


    hope this helps

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