Weird pt complaints

[at your cervix]

OK , I'll start. Last night I had a post partum patient tell me "I keep passing out in my sleep" could someone please explain this one to me??????? Lets hear some of your strangest pt complaints.

[jemb]

I worked on the seventh floor of the hospital. Whenever we had an earthquake of any significance, the building would rock and sway. Inevitably multiple call lights would come on, and we would hear patients calling "Nurse, nurse! We're having an earthquake!"

Sure, lady. As soon as I catch the med cart which has taken off down the hall by itself, I'll come in and hold your room still.

[ShelleyERgirl, LPN]

When I worked in ER, we had a young couple bring their baby in, in the middle of the night for a sore throat. Come on, did the baby sound a little hoorifice that day or what. Did she say her throat hurt? It was probably the same mom who thought her nipple was going to explode! LOL :roll :roll

Can you see the headlines on that one?

[Rapheal]

Post op gallbladder removal. Just off NPO. Drinks a whole can of soda, eats all the candy her S/O brought in, goes to smoke a cigarette.

Then wants "something for nausea".

[tinkagain]

My friend was fresh out of nursing school and working in M.D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston. She worked in the lung clinic.

She answered the phone one day and a little old man asked her iin a very Texas accent if she could ask "Dr. Waranga for some of them Dear Jesus pills".

My friend asked him to repeat and he said "Honey, just ask the doctor for some of those Dear Jesus pills for me". She then went and got another nurse to decipher this. Unfortunately, the other nurse was Phillipino and had a little trouble communicating with the elderly Texan. Finally, my friend wrote down the message and decided to tackle it later.

She called me at my job across the street and said "Do you have any idea what Dear Jesus pills are?" I thought she was kidding, of course. When I found out she was serious, I asked her if it was a cancer patient. She said yes. Putting 2+2 together I came up with Duragesic for pain. ROFLOL Sure enough that was the med.

[nurseygrrl, LPN]

Not a weird pt. complaint, but funny nonetheless...

We had a new admission to our unit on Friday and the doc wrote an order for nursing ambulation with two assists BID...sounds all well and good until you realize the patient is a BILATERAL AMPUTEE who refused prosthetics and hasn't walked in over 10 years!! Even funnier, the evening nurse picked up the order!!

[frannybee]

Sweet Jebus....I'm laughing with my hand over my mouth because that is just as scary as it is funny.

[Stargazer]

Originally posted by Rapheal

Post op gallbladder removal. Just off NPO. Drinks a whole can of soda, eats all the candy her S/O brought in, goes to smoke a cigarette.

Then wants "something for nausea".

Oh yeah. Had a patient who c/o intractable nausea and vomiting. maybe your chain-smoking isn't helping, sir? Just a thought.

Had a lady in ICU (4th floor of the hospital) on the vent for 2 months. Finally got her weaned and sent her to the respiratory unit (16th floor). Hubby approached the staff a day or 2 later complaining that the altitude was making it hard for her to breathe and demanding she be returned to the ICU!

[RNonsense]

Originally posted by Stargazer

Had a lady in ICU (4th floor of the hospital) on the vent for 2 months. Finally got her weaned and sent her to the respiratory unit (16th floor). Hubby approached the staff a day or 2 later complaining that the altitude was making it hard for her to breathe and demanding she be returned to the ICU!

:rotfl:

[tinkagain]

:roll

[caroladybelle, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by tinkagain

She called me at my job across the street and said "Do you have any idea what Dear Jesus pills are?" I thought she was kidding, of course. When I found out she was serious, I asked her if it was a cancer patient. She said yes. Putting 2+2 together I came up with Duragesic for pain. ROFLOL Sure enough that was the med.

In GA, it was always "Da lord did" (Dilaudid) and some "More Fiend" (Morphine). :rolleyes:

[zudy]

In Arkansas, when asking about past medical history, pt st she has once had the "Smiling, Mighty Jesus" (spinal menengitis). Several pts have told me they had surgery for "Copper Toed Syndrome" (carpal tunnel syndrome.) :)

[dawngloves, BSN, RN]

My favorite is always "Old Timers" disease!