Please hear me out. Anyone! No one seems to give a rip.

  1. I really don't know what to do here.
    Here I sit, sick as a dog, and wondering what the heck went on at work tonight.

    It all started last night. Me and my friend (another CNA) fairly new to the facility, and not much older than myself, were schedualed til 3:am. The whole 3-11 shift I had the charge nurse from hell asking ridiculous things of me. I started coming down with slight cold symptoms. I didn't feel great, but I felt that I could still go through with the twlve hours. Another aide who had 14 some yearrs there was working a double, offered to pull a 20 hour shift and cover my last 4. I was appriciative of the offer but I turned it down 5 different times not wanting some one to overwork themselves 20 hours. Anyway the other aide whom I am good friends with, who was staying a 12 also gets to talking with some of her friends, and then had the double shift aide cover her last 4. Ant the EVE/NOC shift change I was starting to feel very sick, and overworked. I had a fever of 100.8. I could hardly hold my head up. WEll my friend CNA lets just call her L. Was sitting in a car with one of her male friends in the back of the facility. The one going on 20 hours (lets call her J) said "Ask L if she'll stay for you." By this time I was struggling to keep my eyes open. I approached her at the car and said "Will you PLEASE work my last four?"
    She was all like "No."
    "I said "Please L I am so darn sick."
    "No, you know why . . . " Meaning the "Super fun" Plans that she had made.
    Knowing that she knew I Would not leave her hanging like that, it kind of made me mad."
    I wanted to walk away before I said anything stupid, so I just said "Whatever." And went back in.
    WEll tonight was another night from hell. I should have called in because Of the skyrocketing temp, and lack of sleep. I finally dosed off at 7 am , and by the time I came to my senses it was too later to call in. I was too busy all shift to even talk to L. Infact I never saw her until shift change. I asked her how her hall went. "Don't you even asked me that!" I sat down next to her and asked her what was wrong. "Like you don't know, I don't even want you around me!"
    The nice nurse over heard her speaking to me that way. And me asking her what her problem was. Lets call her (M) said that she will midiate with us after report. I thought it was kind of silly, but M is a strong girl , and after a few minutes I realized that L wanted to kick my butt . . . seriously. anyway, we got outside, she started screaming at me about how I said Whatever to her. I was explaining that I was ill, and was not in the best of all moods. With a fake smile, she looked at M and said okay, no more problems, I siad the same. After M went back in I said "I'm sorry L. I didn't know that you took it that way."
    She just said don't ever talk to me again. It ended there. But she is the type of person to hold grudges and do bad things to people she hates. The sad thing is we work so well together, and we were becoming good friends. I should not have been the one appologising, but we had a special friendship, and I don't want to throw that away. Thanks for listning
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  2. 27 Comments

  3. by   weetziebat
    It sucks when that happens, but I really don't think you did anything to apologize for, and it seems to me that she is the one throwing away a friendship. Maybe after you left someone said that she was wrong to not work for you (with you obviously sick) and she felt guilty.

    But you've tried to get things straightened out between the two of you. Maybe she will give it some thought and come around, maybe not. Sorry you have to work with someone who is acting like a child, and hope she doesn't do anything 'bad' to you. I work with some people like that and it makes it difficult all around. At least you know you tried. Good luck
  4. by   Tweety
    You may have thought you had a friend, but when the poop hit the fan and you needed her she selfishly went out to play and couldn't understand when you apologized.

    She's no friend. Consider yourself lucky you found out. She burned her bridges, sooner or later she's going to know what it feels like to really need a friend and she won't have one because she wasn't one.

    You apologized, whether or not you "should have" is beside the point because it takes a better person to apologize and move on. So rise above it.

    She's only displacing, because she knows you should be mad at her, so if she gets mad at you instead, it lets her off the hook, and eases her guilt.

    I'm sorry she hurt you. Good luck.
  5. by   canoehead
    It's too bad she wasn't the friend or the person you thought she was. Now that you know what kind of person she is, why do you care about her opinion? Don't think twice about it, you did nothing wrong.
  6. by   LatinaRN
    a person that ends a freindship that easily, was never a friend to begin with. she ended the friendship now over this....sooner or later she would have ended it over something stupid. be glad that its over now and you didn't invest too much time being her friend.
  7. by   Saved_by_Grace
    She is obviously very childish. I know it's easier said than done, but I'd try not to give her a second thought. She's not worth the headache.
  8. by   purplemania
    she needs to grow up. Sounds like you did not lose a real friend anyway. As for concern about what she might do, just be prepared to take any threats to authorities. There is no place for such behavior.
  9. by   Fun2, RN, BSN
    It's sad to think that adults act this way, and it's really hard to find this out when you're ill.

    Hope you're feeling better, and I hope you can work things out....at least to be able to have a comfortable work relationship.

    However, I'm not sure I'd go as far as trying to make her a friend.
  10. by   CoffeeRTC
    Darn some people can be caddy. You apoligized once..thats enough.
    Stinks you had to work like that. Would they or could they have looked for someone to come in for you?
  11. by   HarryPotter
    I agree with 3rd shift guy. You have nothing to apologize for and she was not, i say not, a friend, or a future one either.
  12. by   saskrn
    She obviously isn't your friend. She sounds like a flake. Blow her off and don't look back.
  13. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I agree. Move on and never depend on this person again.
  14. by   akcarmean
    Quote from 3rdShiftGuy
    You may have thought you had a friend, but when the poop hit the fan and you needed her she selfishly went out to play and couldn't understand when you apologized.

    She's no friend. Consider yourself lucky you found out. She burned her bridges, sooner or later she's going to know what it feels like to really need a friend and she won't have one because she wasn't one.

    You apologized, whether or not you "should have" is beside the point because it takes a better person to apologize and move on. So rise above it.

    She's only displacing, because she knows you should be mad at her, so if she gets mad at you instead, it lets her off the hook, and eases her guilt.

    I'm sorry she hurt you. Good luck.

    Have to agree with Tweety very well put.
    Angie.

    PS I also hope she dosen't do anything to you but don't be afraid to report her to your supervisor is she does something @ work.

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