Jump to content

Please hear me out. Anyone! No one seems to give a rip.

Specializes in Mostly LTC, some acute and some ER,.

I really don't know what to do here.

Here I sit, sick as a dog, and wondering what the heck went on at work tonight.

It all started last night. Me and my friend (another CNA) fairly new to the facility, and not much older than myself, were schedualed til 3:am. The whole 3-11 shift I had the charge nurse from hell asking ridiculous things of me. I started coming down with slight cold symptoms. I didn't feel great, but I felt that I could still go through with the twlve hours. Another aide who had 14 some yearrs there was working a double, offered to pull a 20 hour shift and cover my last 4. I was appriciative of the offer but I turned it down 5 different times not wanting some one to overwork themselves 20 hours. Anyway the other aide whom I am good friends with, who was staying a 12 also gets to talking with some of her friends, and then had the double shift aide cover her last 4. Ant the EVE/NOC shift change I was starting to feel very sick, and overworked. I had a fever of 100.8. I could hardly hold my head up. WEll my friend CNA lets just call her L. Was sitting in a car with one of her male friends in the back of the facility. The one going on 20 hours (lets call her J) said "Ask L if she'll stay for you." By this time I was struggling to keep my eyes open. I approached her at the car and said "Will you PLEASE work my last four?"

She was all like "No."

"I said "Please L I am so darn sick."

"No, you know why . . . " Meaning the "Super fun" Plans that she had made.

Knowing that she knew I Would not leave her hanging like that, it kind of made me mad."

I wanted to walk away before I said anything stupid, so I just said "Whatever." And went back in.

WEll tonight was another night from hell. I should have called in because Of the skyrocketing temp, and lack of sleep. I finally dosed off at 7 am , and by the time I came to my senses it was too later to call in. I was too busy all shift to even talk to L. Infact I never saw her until shift change. I asked her how her hall went. "Don't you even asked me that!" I sat down next to her and asked her what was wrong. "Like you don't know, I don't even want you around me!"

The nice nurse over heard her speaking to me that way. And me asking her what her problem was. Lets call her (M) said that she will midiate with us after report. I thought it was kind of silly, but M is a strong girl , and after a few minutes I realized that L wanted to kick my butt . . . seriously. anyway, we got outside, she started screaming at me about how I said Whatever to her. I was explaining that I was ill, and was not in the best of all moods. With a fake smile, she looked at M and said okay, no more problems, I siad the same. After M went back in I said "I'm sorry L. I didn't know that you took it that way."

She just said don't ever talk to me again. It ended there. But she is the type of person to hold grudges and do bad things to people she hates. The sad thing is we work so well together, and we were becoming good friends. I should not have been the one appologising, but we had a special friendship, and I don't want to throw that away. Thanks for listning

It sucks when that happens, but I really don't think you did anything to apologize for, and it seems to me that she is the one throwing away a friendship. Maybe after you left someone said that she was wrong to not work for you (with you obviously sick) and she felt guilty.

But you've tried to get things straightened out between the two of you. Maybe she will give it some thought and come around, maybe not. Sorry you have to work with someone who is acting like a child, and hope she doesn't do anything 'bad' to you. I work with some people like that and it makes it difficult all around. At least you know you tried. Good luck :)

Tweety, BSN, RN

Has 28 years experience. Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

You may have thought you had a friend, but when the poop hit the fan and you needed her she selfishly went out to play and couldn't understand when you apologized.

She's no friend. Consider yourself lucky you found out. She burned her bridges, sooner or later she's going to know what it feels like to really need a friend and she won't have one because she wasn't one.

You apologized, whether or not you "should have" is beside the point because it takes a better person to apologize and move on. So rise above it.

She's only displacing, because she knows you should be mad at her, so if she gets mad at you instead, it lets her off the hook, and eases her guilt.

I'm sorry she hurt you. Good luck.

canoehead, BSN, RN

Has 30 years experience. Specializes in ER.

It's too bad she wasn't the friend or the person you thought she was. Now that you know what kind of person she is, why do you care about her opinion? Don't think twice about it, you did nothing wrong.

a person that ends a freindship that easily, was never a friend to begin with. she ended the friendship now over this....sooner or later she would have ended it over something stupid. be glad that its over now and you didn't invest too much time being her friend. :rolleyes:

She is obviously very childish. I know it's easier said than done, but I'd try not to give her a second thought. She's not worth the headache.

she needs to grow up. Sounds like you did not lose a real friend anyway. As for concern about what she might do, just be prepared to take any threats to authorities. There is no place for such behavior.

Fun2, BSN, RN

Specializes in Operating Room.

It's sad to think that adults act this way, and it's really hard to find this out when you're ill.

Hope you're feeling better, and I hope you can work things out....at least to be able to have a comfortable work relationship.

However, I'm not sure I'd go as far as trying to make her a friend.

CoffeeRTC, BSN, RN

Has 25 years experience.

Darn some people can be caddy. You apoligized once..thats enough.

Stinks you had to work like that. Would they or could they have looked for someone to come in for you?

I agree with 3rd shift guy. You have nothing to apologize for and she was not, i say not, a friend, or a future one either.

She obviously isn't your friend. She sounds like a flake. Blow her off and don't look back.

SmilingBluEyes

Has 20 years experience.

I agree. Move on and never depend on this person again.

akcarmean, LPN

Specializes in Home Health Care,LTC.

You may have thought you had a friend, but when the poop hit the fan and you needed her she selfishly went out to play and couldn't understand when you apologized.

She's no friend. Consider yourself lucky you found out. She burned her bridges, sooner or later she's going to know what it feels like to really need a friend and she won't have one because she wasn't one.

You apologized, whether or not you "should have" is beside the point because it takes a better person to apologize and move on. So rise above it.

She's only displacing, because she knows you should be mad at her, so if she gets mad at you instead, it lets her off the hook, and eases her guilt.

I'm sorry she hurt you. Good luck.

Have to agree with Tweety very well put.

Angie.

PS I also hope she dosen't do anything to you but don't be afraid to report her to your supervisor is she does something @ work.

Isn't the description of someone like this....sociopath? They honestly do not care about anyone but themselves.

If you give into her now, offering apoligies and trying to mend the friendship, she will now know she can walk all over you and treat you like crap. Don't take it.

I have known people like this, they are complete haters and very immature. Do not talk to her again other than work related activities. If she is like this, then it will only end up burning you again.

Rebecca

ok......lemme see if I've got this right...

she wouldn't cover for you for 4 hours when you were sick..you said 'whatever'..she got pissed..you appologized..she's still pissed......I'm still trying to see the 'friendship' here and why you are letting her get to you...gotta agree with PhoenixGirl, don't let her walk all over you...!@#$ me once shame on you !@#$ me twice shame on ME.

Welcome to the real world, we are heatlthcare workers, but human, some evil, always go to a supervisor/charge nurse with a situation such as yours at the very onset, that is their job to protect the parient and you, now it is time to inform a nurse who is responsible for the floor and the patients of this entire situation, keep it confidential, this is to insure, you don't get bit by retalliation, which could very well end your career, remember allways motivate your actions to protect the patient. Good Luck.

Sounds a bit like someone with borderline personality disorder to me: they can make friends fast and then treat 'em like dirt.

NurseFirst

Isn't the description of someone like this....sociopath? They honestly do not care about anyone but themselves.

If you give into her now, offering apoligies and trying to mend the friendship, she will now know she can walk all over you and treat you like crap. Don't take it.

I have known people like this, they are complete haters and very immature. Do not talk to her again other than work related activities. If she is like this, then it will only end up burning you again.

Rebecca

snowfreeze, BSN, RN

Has 16 years experience. Specializes in ICU, CCU, Trauma, neuro, Geriatrics.

Ok and where is the employer? You are truly ill and still working? Where I work staffing is such that if one or two people call off we can just deal with it. And since there isnt a lot of overtime anymore, someone is usually happy to fill in. Why didn't you go to the supervisor and say you are sick? How many patients are now sick from you spreading whatever you had?

As far as the friend goes, hey its your shift and she didn't want to cover it. She could be a bit more mature about how she relates that but still, it wasn't her responsibility.

Trying to figure out what went wrong is a good thing, this will help you when you become an RN. You will be responsible for a lot more and will have to make decisions and mediate when there are disagreements.

tattooednursie, LVN

Specializes in Mostly LTC, some acute and some ER,.

Thank you everyone for your insight.

I saw her last night when I went to one of my prereque classes. She came up to me and told me how sorry she was, and told me that she was having the night from hell the night she went off on me as well as I was. She sounded quite sincere, and told me that she didn't know why she did it. So, Should I trust her

:S

ty

Thank you everyone for your insight.

I saw her last night when I went to one of my prereque classes. She came up to me and told me how sorry she was, and told me that she was having the night from hell the night she went off on me as well as I was. She sounded quite sincere, and told me that she didn't know why she did it. So, Should I trust her

:S

ty

i would would forgive... but don't forget, and be cautious, she sounds like a powder keg taht can go off at any time and whoever is around is caught in her explosion. Be nice but steer clear as much as possible.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×

By using the site you agree to our Privacy, Cookies, and Terms of Service Policies.

OK