People think you are rich because you are a nurse

Nurses General Nursing

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First I had to loan my in-laws 1500.00 to keep the bank from foreclosing on their home (never got it back). Then 2 other people borrowed 20.00 and never paid me back. Now I have this so-called "friend" who calls me about 2-3 times per month to borrow money. She has 5 kids and uses the line "the baby needs milk" or "we have no food". Now, neither work and they draw checks, foodstamps, plus the kids draw checks as well, they get assistance with utilities, and free medical care and free medicines. I used to loan them money, never to get it back. I felt sorry for them. Well, I wont loan them money anymore, but they still try it constantly. She called me 4 times today WHILE I WAS WORKING...hinting for money. I work all day 5 days a week while they lay on their butts all day and do nothing (there is more physically wrong with me than either of them). Im working, they can too. But they honestly think Im rich because Im a nurse and I can just shell out money at a moment's notice. Do any of you experience this with people? I get tired of watching lazy people (not the people who actually need help) get so much help and still expect more from people who WORK. Im tired of lines like "you are a nurse and make the big bucks", etc. grrrrrrrrr.

And yes, the doors to "chenoaspirit national bank" are now closed. lol, but I just find it so frustrating. I will no longer allow anyone to make me feel sorry for them. I feel bad when I say no, but dang.

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I hate that assumption. People don't care what bills or obligations you have, all they see are dollar signs. Once they hear that you are a nurse , it's like they hear cha-ching !!

Specializes in OB, Peds, Med Surg and Geriatric Nsg.

To the OP, you are not the only one going through this. When I got a nursing job, all of my family's relatives back in the Philippines kept on begging money from my parents. They think that I'm livin' large here because I'm here in the US and earning lots of Benjamins. The truth is, I'm still financially struggling. With so much bills to pay including personal necessities, I think I'm nearly going broke. People think that if they have a personal connection to you, you owe them something. It is up to you and your attitude on how to deal with this. The money you worked hard for will be for only you and you alone. You are the one who worked your a$$ for every hour of your shift. Learn to say NO or cut your ties with them. People like this should learn a lesson that money is not found in the streets nor the pockets of your friends, they gotta work and earn it.

Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

Looks like many of us have been in your shoes. But to many people (like your "friends") we do look rich .My salary is 2 times that of the cna's I work with-it's 3 times that of the kid working at the convenience store. However these same cna's run to the windows every time we hear thru the grapevine that a car is getting towed for repo from the employee lot.But they order in lunch 3 or 4 days per week,have i-pods,manicures,big plasma tv's and blu ray players.They dig holes as deep as they can and when hard times really hit and they can't get anymore credit they get angry.They have entitlement issues-the system is set up for them to just suck and suck up resources.No disrespect to those of you on the boards whom have worked hard and pulled yourself up out of that system but the other kind of people out number you ( or used to until the economy tanked) just remember-don't make yourself a victim...

Specializes in Critical Care, Nsg QA.

It sounds like you are having a hard time saying "no," especially when you hear the sob stories. I have a sister that has tried to get money out of me (she already had drained my elderly mother). at the first hint of begging for bucks, I started to tell her about my bills, and that I just couldn't do it. One thing you might try is to put much of your money in a savings account, so it is not easily accessible. Then in all honesty you can say you don't have it.

As for calling on cell phones, if yours has caller i.d., when the name pops up, simply hit the silencer, or wait until it stops ringging and turn it off. Don't empower them - it's your phone and YOU decide who you will talk to and when.

Specializes in CSICU/CTICU.

THIS INFURIATES ME. Not only are your "friends" taking advantage of you..but they are taking advantage of ME and EVERYONE ELSE WHO PAYS TAXES. Two grown adults who are "responsible" enough to pop out multiple children..yet both are able-bodied and do not look for jobs or care to work? This is shameful and pathetic. I wish I could sit around and collect money from the government and from my friends, but I bust my orifice to get an education and be a productive member of society. Now, of course, there are situations where people NEED to get benefits... but you have implied that they are just lazy (able bodied but not working)? They are milking you and they are milking the system. People like this have more children because they can collect more money per child, and it's wrong. Can you tell I'm angry? LOL

THAT BEING SAID.. I live in New York City..Nurses are not rich. Even Doctors pale in comparison to what we have going on in this city... You want to see rich, go talk to my friends who work at hedge funds or investment banks..fresh out of college making 200+ a year...and that's "poor" compared to their higher ups or to those with family money lol I know, it's crazy!

Elle

I don't think its so much of that you are a nurse, but if you have a nice house and car people think that you have extra money to give to them. I worked in IT for over 7 years and my friends and family would ask me for money. Yeah, I have money but its for me. I mean hell I have a mortgage and a **** load of bills not to mention the amount of money that I spend on my three kids, so the money is for me to take care of my needs not yours. My mom would always says bless her with some money, huh pleaze. People will use you if you allow them too. Its frustrating :devil:that you work hard to have a decent life and people are in your pockets as if you are working for them. I no longer have sympathy for them. I had to decide if I was going to make myself happy by giving someone my money, or if I was going to be happy by keeping my money, so I decided to keep my money :)and if someone needed any money then that was a personal issue that they needed to figure out not me.

It's sad but everyone already knows that I'm not someone to borrow from, I don't have much contact with much of my relatives besides close family members because I don't want to be involved in their drama and petty lives and I don't lend money to friends period. When I do get my first nursing job, I'll be making a nice check considering I don't really have much debt, if I do give out money to anyone, it will either be my parents because they helped me get through school, they took very good care of me and my dad helped pay my tuition or my sister because she works very hard but she needs the help sometimes. These aren't people that would borrow on a regular basis and if I offered money to them they would be reluctant to take it. I wouldn't consider it a loan and I wouldn't expect them to pay it back. However, I wouldn't lend any to my brother's, which I know sounds bad but they haven't done anything with their lives yet they have 3-4 children with different women and they could have done something. It may be mean but that's just how it is, they rarely even remember my birthday, that's how estranged we are.

Specializes in Critical Care, Cardiology, Adult-Elderly.

My experience with a freeloading family member who was "despirate" for milk for the baby, etc., was to purchase for her a voucher (not a gift certificate, which can be used for anything) from a local grocery store that was to be used for groceries only-no cigarettes, alcohol, movies, magazines, and sent it to her. I never was asked for money again.

My experience with a freeloading family member who was "despirate" for milk for the baby, etc., was to purchase for her a voucher (not a gift certificate, which can be used for anything) from a local grocery store that was to be used for groceries only-no cigarettes, alcohol, movies, magazines, and sent it to her. I never was asked for money again.

This sounds like buying a sandwich and a drink for a street beggar instead of handing them money. Good idea.

Dump these people from your life as much as it's possible to do so. You are being used and used badly. If that one person doesn't have enough money for milk for her baby I suggest she get a job instead of nagging others to fund her reproductive choices.

Tell them to their faces that the bank of chenoaspirit is permanently closed. When they call on the phone at work, you can see who it is, hang up without saying a word, eventually they will give up, if you consistently do not say a single word to them.

Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.
My experience with a freeloading family member who was "despirate" for milk for the baby, etc., was to purchase for her a voucher (not a gift certificate, which can be used for anything) from a local grocery store that was to be used for groceries only-no cigarettes, alcohol, movies, magazines, and sent it to her. I never was asked for money again.

Or even better: offer to go and buy the groceries for them. That often gets a "no, that's OK, we'll manage" from the spongers in my family.

As for cell phones, when you look on the phone and see who the call is from, nobody makes you answer it. I never answer my cell phone unless I want to take the call. It is on silent or vibrate and does not interrupt my work or other activities. And yes, you can block certain numbers if you contact the cell phone provider. My grandchildren's phones have blocked numbers that my daughter arranged through the carrier.

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