LO's that KNOW IT ALL

[ktwlpn, LPN]

Don't you just LOVE families and visitors that try to tell us what we should and should not be doing? I had to deal with one yesterday that takes the cake.She has 2 loved ones in our LTC and calls the MD directly to make demands and (problem number 2) the MD does whatever she asks! She must be notifed prior to any change in meds (which we do always do that but sometimes it may be the next shift if we get swamped) But SHE decides if her loved one will receive the med...She called one evening recently and told the nurse on duty that she decided that a particular med had to be dc'd-and insisted the nurse call the doc right away The doc just blew it off " Whatever-do it" So her loved one has been having problems ever since.I went through the nurse's notes and reviewed the sequence of events with her-she is more focused on BEING right and having the last word then what is best for her family.I could have smacked the crap out of her!

She KNOWS it ALL because SHE took the med one time and SHE -..fill in the blanks...

or SHE talked to. ..- fill in the blanks...

or SHE read that ... -fill in the blanks...

After I mustered my courage and informed her that independently gathering info from places like the internet and the friendly neighborhood pharmacist is NOT in her loved one's best interests and that decisions regarding administering meds and making diagnosis' is best left to the MD,NOT to her or we nurses and that she can not compare her health history and experiences with theirs then she wanted to argue with me about when the particular set of symptoms began.I had it right in front of me in black and white but SHE wasn't having it...WHAT A WITCH!!! The WORST PART is her loved ones suffer needlessly because of her stubborn controlling manipulative behaviors.Ssomeone needs to make one of those anonymous calls to the ombusdman:lol2:.The state decreed sometime ago that LTC's need to consider the residents NEED ahead of the FAMILY'S demand...I wonder what they would say about this situation?

[squeakykitty]

Someone does need to make that call to the ombudsman. The residents needs are much more important than what the family wants.

[ebear, BSN, RN]

What a pain!!! Until the doc grows some testicles, it's not likely to change. :barf01:

[nrsang97, BSN, RN]

First the doc needs to grow a pair. He had went to med school and not her. I really cannot stand when family dictate what meds the pr will and will not take. I can understand if there is a real concern from previous experience (pt experience not their own).

Call the ombudsman and help that resident get their needs met. Good luck to you.

[txspadequeenRN, BSN, RN]

right!!!!!

what a pain!!! until the doc grows some testicles, it's not likely to change. :barf01:

[classicdame, MSN, EdD]

Be sure you document effectively. You are the patient's advocate. Documentation and good assessments are for the patient's benefit and your protection as well. There is a chain of command in which the MD can be over-ruled if the patient is not receiving appropriate care. CYA - cover your assessment.

[sharona97, BSN, RN]

I don't work in an LTC but don't they have family conferences, including social workers, docs, nurses, therapists. Get the gang together and hear her out and then tell the real story about what is nec. to give her mother the best care she needs. And tell her like it is.

Manipulative families sometimes need a talkin to! Ya Know?

[BBFRN, BSN, PhD]

Has anyone clued the doc in to what this family member is doing yet? Maybe he isn't aware.

[ear]

I don't work in an LTC but don't they have family conferences, including social workers, docs, nurses, therapists. Get the gang together and hear her out and then tell the real story about what is nec. to give her mother the best care she needs. And tell her like it is.

Manipulative families sometimes need a talkin to! Ya Know?

This was always the key when I was in LTC. Mostly it wasnt a talkin to they needed, but some honest and open education.

Best to you!!

[mesixfuture]

I feel your pain. I was looking thru one of my peds patient's recent clinical results for an H&P and found a note from an ER doc that read something to the effect of "discharged pt to home, grandmother called back and said the pt was to be admitted, vital signs stable, labs w/i normal limits, no ill signs/symptoms noted" but by golly they brought her back in and he admitted the kid. What the heck? When did Granny get admitting privileges? We had a drug seeker that lived on our floor for months, came in every few days with some new ache or pain that had no rhyme or reason. Finally one of our docs refused to give her any more narcotics, and she was suddenly well enough to go home and hasn't been back. When he refused her narcotics, one of our RNs drew him a pair and labeled it "Sack Of Courage". He carries it around in his wallet. I'll see if I can't get a copy for the OP's doc, maybe he just needs to be reminded they're in his pants somewhere.

[sharona97, BSN, RN]

This was always the key when I was in LTC. Mostly it wasnt a talkin to they needed, but some honest and open education.

Best to you!!

I agree,but the OP problem for the family member who"knew"everything sometimes needs yes education but assertivness as to why the choices for the patient are made.

[Kymmi]

So ktwlpn.....why do you say "someone" needs to call......why do you not do it yourself if you feel so strongly about this?

I see your point if you've tried to explain to this person that just because she had something happen because of a med doesnt mean everyone reacts to it the same way. I also know the type of person you are referring too and no matter how much education they receive they will still always insist on being right and stick by their decisions.

There are some family members out there that do want to be involved and do want to do the right things for their loved ones and sometimes its a matter of education and I think we need to remember that sometimes when we have patients or families that refuse certain treatment plans.

I do really wonder why if you do feel as strongly about this woman not doing what is best for the patient that it is your obligation to call and be a patient advocate.