Younger Nurses: Do you find people dont take you seriously? (semi-rant)

TweetiePieRN · Dec 17, 2005

Ok..so this has been bothering me a lot, but yesterday I had an encounter with a PT and now this is starting to get to me. Just a little rant..and I'd like to know if anyone else feels this way and how you deal with it.
Little backround on me: I'm 22, and def. look younger then I am. I worked for 2 years as a student nurse aide, 3 months in PA as a RN on a peds/med-surg floor, and now im here in Texas doing Peds home health. I have had my fair share of experiences, and although I know im not an expert, I'm most certainly not a novice. Therefore..it bothers me when people never take me seriously that I'm a nurse.
Yesterday I took my patient to PT, and the PT and I were talking, and she asks about me and my backround. And so I tell her, and shes like " Oh you must be a LPN then.." (NO disrespect meant to LPNS here WHATSOEVER!) No ma'am, I'm an RN, yes I have my bachelors, yes I went to school for 4 years, and yes I have experience ( Now i didnt tell her that, just told her that I was an RN, but thats what I wanted to say).. she just seemed so shocked..and shes not the only one who is shocked that I'm a RN. She was kind of just the last straw since this wasnt the first time..
I've had lots of people seem to not take me seriously that I'm a nurse, and this frustrates me. I just hate when people find out I'm a nurse and say- not ask- they say "you must be an LPN then". I worked hard for my bachelors..ugh..just ask me what I am and i'll gladly tell u! With each new job..I pretty much get asked how old I am every time...
So..after this rant, since this has been on my mind all day..I feel better.
Does anyone else experience this? I want to be taken seriously..not looked at like I must not know much about nursing since I look younger and therefore have no experience. I'm really just curious as to opinions and what you all think..
I dont want to stir anything up,but I'm just frustrated and needed to vent. thanks for responses in advance! :)

I am 26 and I have been told I look 19 or 20. I am only 4'11" so that makes it even more believable that I am a "Child" LOL! I do get people asking who their nurse is and I tell them it is me. Then they get this puzzled look on their face and say "You are an RN?". I have to assure them and then show them my badge to prove it.

When they ask me how old I am...I just say with a smile "I am older than you think". It used to get on my nerves too, but just let it go. I would much rather them think I look younger than to think I look 15 yrs older!! There happens to another nurse I work with. She is 3 yrs younger than me, but looks quite a bit older than my real age!

How long have you been an RN? If you have been a nurse under a year, then you are still technically a novice nurse. There is nothing wrong with this. No one looks down on your skills. We all have to start somewhere. Over time, you will get more assertive and it will get to the point that how people perceive your youth will bother you less and less. :) Good luck!

elizabells, BSN, RN · Dec 17, 2005

For all the times I've had to hear it, I d%^n well better look thirty when I'm fifty!

And can I tell you how tired I am of getting hit on by fourteen year old boys bc they think I'm around their age. There is something so unaccountably creepy about it!

hbncns35 · Dec 17, 2005

Just thought I would add that:

I am 35, a young 35, and when I walk into the room, the patient automatically thinks I am a nurse and I am in charge. I have to explain to them in mid sentence that I am a PCT with One semester left in NSG School. They say OH! Well you look and act like a nurse. I take it like Well I am in the right field at least. I think young or old it is how you carry yourself with confidence and assurance that other people notice and Yes sometimes that synergy of coming into yourself and integrating only comes when you are older and have more experience with different life issues. I do think some younger folk appear older than they are due to early maturation acquired through tackling difficult issues. I still come across a few who in my opinion have no business being in Nursing but who knows maybe they add something I don't to the profession. Youth has its advantages-better backs and quicker resiliency. In essence we all have our Good and Bad points........................HB

TweetiePieRN · Dec 17, 2005

And can I tell you how tired I am of getting hit on by fourteen year old boys bc they think I'm around their age. There is something so unaccountably creepy about it!

That is sooo funny! Had that experience the other night with my 17 yrs old pt's friend (who is also 17). The kid was trying to impress me with his muscles and made some comment about hooking up with a nurse...I did tell him my age, that I a married and a mother. His jaw hit the floor and he apologized! Boy, did he get a shock. BTW I like older guys anyway :rotfl:

FNimuaeMae · Dec 17, 2005

I was like 27 or 28 (been an RN for 2 years), ambulating a little old lady in the hallways, and she asked me when I was going to graduate from high school. Had to tell her that had happened a while ago.:chuckle

Even now where I work, I still feel alot younger at 33 than some of my coworkers who are the around the same age. I always chalk it up to an experiential factor... alot of them are married, with kids, having worked in the ICU for years and years when I have been there for less than 2 years.

A friend of mine was with her mom when they were running errands and some lady needed their car moved when she was the only one in the car, so she did it. The lady afterwards asked her if she should have been doing that... thought she was like 14, and she was 21 or so.

I myself see the new grads at work and they look so young to me... must be getting old myself! :rolleyes:

Missy

TexasPediRN · Dec 17, 2005

To defend my original post, I'm not trying to say I am an expert in nursing, because I am far from that. The post is more meant to see if others take younger nurses seriously, rather then to state how long I have been a nurse for.

Yes, I have been a nurse for under a year, and yes, I know this is considered a 'novice' nurse. I was referring to the term 'novice' in my original post mainly as someone right out of nursing school with no hospital or nursing experience. Perhaps I should have been more clear. I was trying to place it in the context that I do have experience, and I do know what i'm talking about and what I am doing (and if I dont, I am first to ask someone!). I gained a lot of hospital experience before I graduated, and to me, this has helped me immensely. I worked as a student nurse aide- and was able to do just everything so that I could learn. I had a very good relationship with the people whom I worked with and they would teach me things, show me how to do things, etc. I was allowed to follow doctors into rooms, where they would teach me things. I learned a lot through that experience, and I think that it helped me greatly in my nursing career.

I do realize that I am young in this field, and that I have a lot to learn.

However, when I get my abilities questioned I feel as if people will not take me seriously. That was where I was going with my original post.

I do see some good ideas though in this post- for instance, saying "older then you think I am!". I like that, I'll have to try it oneday :)

I also know that i'll appreciate the young look when I'm older, but when you are younger, and in a professional field, you dont want to appear as young as you do, and constantly have people question you about it.

NurseEllie and RunningFool:

I completely agree with both of your posts. Especially after many times of getting asked how old you are, it does get insulting. Our age is focused on more then our nursing abilities, or so sometimes it seems this way.

I do appreciate everyones responses and how quickly responses were given.

I didnt want to turn this into anything, just looking for that advice and I truely appreciate the advice given from everyone :)

Lisa CCU RN, RN · Dec 17, 2005

Believe me, I totally feel your pain here....not only in the real world but in my personal life as well.
I am 22, look like I am much much younger, AND i have *braces*....
I have lived on my own since I was seventeen, own my car, and I am married. I have served four years in the military, work in the ICU as a nurse tech, and have one year of school left before I get my license. I am at the top of my class and the nurses I work with treat me like I already have my license, because I have proved to be extremely competent. Oh, and I don't walk around with a chip on my shoulder like I am a know-it-all either.
However, I was thrown out of a bar one night because the owner was very rude to me and told me that my ID was fake. When I gave her three more picture IDs, two of which were military issue, she went into a rant about kids my age and threw me out because it was a private establishment and she had every legal right to do so....didn't matter that I was polite, didn't matter that i was legal age, didn't matter that I was their with my HUSBAND wanting to celebrate his HOMECOMING FROM A YEAR LONG DEPLOYMENT.
I also have been attacked on these boards disagreeing with other nurses on certain issues....their reasoning being that I am young and know nothing about said issues. It is really quite frustrating.
I may be young, but I am still an intelligent, articulate young woman with thoughts and oppinions about world issues, nursing issues, and life issues

Shoot, I never would have guessed you were 22. From your comments on the board, I thought you were a little older-- I'm older than you! You "carry" yourself quite well, and I have never met you in person, but you come across as very mature.

Depending on how I wear my hair, I can pass for 18! At 25, people at my job thought I was in high school! They really fell out when they found out I was married with TWO kids. Go figure.

NPAlby · Dec 17, 2005

I just had a similliar experience this past week. The pts on a floor I was working perdiem thought I was a student. First they guessed I was a med student then a nursing student. I'm less than a year away from the big 3-0 so I really don't mind. I'm 4-11, don't wear make-up and I guess I still dress like a college student.

My problem is when people think I'm an aide (no offense to the aides and techs out there). And maybe it's just me and I being paranoid but I feel it's because I'm Hispanic and very Pocahantas/ethnic/exotic looking. It's like they're shocked a Hispanic female can get her RN and BSN. The reason I don't think it's the age factor is because they usually bring up questions about my cultural background. UGH!!!

Stereotypes are annoying in whatever form they come in. I've learned to just smile tell them the facts, (if I'm in the mood - I don't feel like I owe it to anyone to explain myself) and do my job as best as I can. As far as the age thing goes I've always "acted" older than my age so people don't dwell on it once I start talking and doing my thing.

nurse4theplanet, RN · Dec 18, 2005

Shoot, I never would have guessed you were 22. From your comments on the board, I thought you were a little older-- I'm older than you! You "carry" yourself quite well, and I have never met you in person, but you come across as very mature.

Thank you so much. That was a very sweet thing to say. My age is NEVER an issue until either I am asked(on these boards), or (if in person) someone ASSUMES and doesn't give me a chance to prove myself......then all of a sudden I am "young and dumb". It makes you feel like you have to work extra hard to earn respect, and it becomes tiring.

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 18, 2005

Respect is earned, indeed. I don't see a LOT of people here blowing off others' opinions based on their age. If they do, it's your right to correct them. But fortunately, most of the time, people are very respectful here.

I can appreciate the young nurse's problem here. When I joined the military, I was often asked if I were "old enough" to be in. I am only 5 feet 2 and joined at 19, looking more like 15 or 16. I was mercilessly teased in my nearly all-male environment for lots of things, not just age. I developed a sense of humor and tough armored shell to deal....

All I can say is it WILL pass, like all things. No one does that to me now------I am still short, but a wee bit (rofl) older. It will pass.

selulion · Dec 20, 2005

I can see where you are all coming from, but I wish my problem was being small and looking young! You do not have anything to prove. Obviously, you are all intellegent or you would not be nurses. I think you should be proud of your accomplishments and do not worry about what others think. I think it is wonderful to decide at a young age to follow your dreams. I will be 29 or 30 when I graduate. I wish I had started sooner. If looking young is your worst problem, be grateful!:chuckle

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Dec 20, 2005

I just wanted to add one more thing.

About 2 weeks ago a salesperson was walking door-to-door in the neighborhood and knocked on my door. I answered and he immediately said, "I need to speak to the lady of the house."

I responded, "You're speaking to her." :rolleyes:

He said, "Oh. I had to make sure, because you looked young."