You won't believe.....

[NanikRN]

True story from this morning---

I'm in break room , reading document student comes in to use computer to preview pts for clinical tomorrow

Hi I'm Sally student

Me - still intent on document--mumbles hi

*silence *

Student --I guess you don't like students I've heard about nurses eating their young

Me: still reading--huhh?

Really? Give me a break

[BSNbeauty, BSN, RN]

I one hundred percent agree with ESME. What was so hard about taking 3 seconds to smile and say Hi?

[llg, PhD, RN]

If these two nurses were men, would that conversation have even happened?

Women carry a heavy burden to be "nice" all the time. We have to be extra nice to our patients these days as well as to everyone else.

Harsh judgement is heaped on a woman who lets that slip.

Great point. I want to "like" it multiple times.

We women make such dramas out of things that should just bounce off of us. Yes, the student was right to introduce herself. The RN could/should have been a little more friendly, but she didn't really do anything wrong. The student responded inappropriately to the RN's subdued acknowledgement.

Now a bunch of people are debating it on the internet. Jeez.

[GundeRN]

I had almost the exact thing happen to me only it was a coworker. I work the night shift and unlike many other people, especially after a long night, I am not very good at multitasking when it comes to reading, typing, and talking to someone else. I had a morning where I was really busy and was trying to type something into the computer when a fresh faced day shifter walks over and says something to me I don't hear, because I am typing, and I kid you not. I am split seconds away from asking her what, I had just decided to finish typing the last word before turning my attention to her and she snapped at me. "So now your not talking to me!" I was dumbfounded. She was snide and nasty after that for weeks! All because I waited a split second before answering her.

People need to lighten up! That student was way out of line. You shouldn't jump down someones throat like that for no reason. And as far as the break room thing goes, sometimes the break room is a place to get away from constant interruptions and get some charting done or read someones history and physical. If I am deep in the critical thinking process, or trying desperately to remember the mess of interventions I just got done doing over the last few hours and the time they took place, I don't have the mindpower left to consider how I say hi to someone who walks into the room and interrupts my train of thought. It's not overt rudeness, just being a human being. That student needs to check herself. Ad so does everyone that jumped down this nurses throat. Unless, you have always responded to someone with a warm smile and your undivided attention in every circumstance yourself, you have no room to judge.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

Sally student is anxious as all get out, give Sally student a break.

[GundeRN]

OP I would be interested to hear what you think the student should have done?

Her comment in response to your coolness was ill judged certainly however she probably felt foolish having greeted someone pleasantly only to be mumbled at.

Would you rather she had turned around and left when she found you in the break room, thereby being underprepared for her clinical the next day? Or on seeing you busy should she have gone ahead with her prep without speaking or introducing herself to you, which would no doubt have brought accusations of rudeness down on her head.

Seems to me she couldn't win and had annoyed you simply by being there. Which makes her observation about you disliking students seem not far off the mark.

The issue here is not with the fact that she said hi. The issue is her remark afterward.

[BSNbeauty, BSN, RN]

I wonder if the OP would have responded in such a way if a colleague or better yet the CEO of the hospital would have walked in.

[chrisrn24]

I am a student right now and although I would not have said that I probably would have thought it! I hope that you don't forget how awkward it is to walk into a strange place, with strange people and have to introduce yourself as the "student". It's very hard for some people![/quote']

I am not a student anymore but I agree. It is very hard to walk into a place you don't know and introduce yourself.

I have a coworker who comes to work early and is always in the break room when I arrive at work. I always say "Hi" as I'm polite. This coworker has no interest in being nice when she isn't on the clock and even though she hears me never responds. Truthfully it angers me.

Sally student shouldn't have made that comment but OP could've been more welcoming. Student probably spends time on forums like these and blurted out her first and honest thought.

[lilaclover6984]

Great point. I want to "like" it multiple times. We women make such dramas out of things that should just bounce off of us. Yes the student was right to introduce herself. The RN could/should have been a little more friendly, but she didn't really do anything wrong. The student responded inappropriately to the RN's subdued acknowledgement. Now a bunch of people are debating it on the internet. Jeez.[/quote']

Lol!!

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

The student was aggressive and downright rude. If that had happened to me, I would have set her straight by pointing out that her attitude had better change quickly if she expects to succeed in clinicals on my floor. I love having students, and I spend my time teaching the ones with good attitudes and who demonstrate curiosity and enthusiasm. This one would not have earned a millisecond of my time.

[psu_213, BSN, RN]

I wonder if the OP would have responded in such a way if a colleague or better yet the CEO of the hospital would have walked in.

It's funny you should say that. As I though about the original scenario I realized that there are some times when I am in the middle of something work related (charting, reading a journal article, etc.) and someone comes up and says "hi, how are you?" I mumble back a quick reply and then go about my business. I have never done that to a student though...it has always been to a fellow RN or to our nurse manager. I am generally well liked at work, people have no trouble talking with me; however, they also understand that if I am in the middle of something I may not give a warm and fuzzy greeting and they realize that it is not about them and take no offense.

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

This is interesting - all the different perceptions.

My first thought was "Oh no not another student with that "nurses eat their young" myth".

We've debated that like crazy here and I think there are rude people everywhere. Nothing significant about nursing that makes people rude. They were most likely rude before they ever became a nurse.

So, that comment would have made ME put down the document and kindly discuss that myth with the student.

As to the OP's response to the student - that reminded me of a set of suggestions put out recently by the place where I work. One of the suggestions was to always greet one another! Well, if I walk into the nurses station and the nurse is having a conversation with the doc about a patient, I'm not going to rudely interrupt to say "HI!". I crossed that one off the list, wrote why I thought that was rude, signed it and turned it in.

[imintrouble, BSN, RN]

I don't see either person behaving in a right or wrong way.

I see them being who they are.

Bubbly student.

Distracted nurse.

Neither one made the best choice as how to respond to the other.

As one who doesn't always read social signals well, I would have thought nothing of the exchange. Just filed it away as how not to react the next time.

However, if I'm honest, which I am, I wouldn't have liked the whole nurse eats their young comment. I DO recognize an insult when I see/here one.