Would You Have Done This?

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

I am friends with a very impulsive friend who is a dedicated RN. She is friendly with a person who seems to feel that my friend is her handmaiden nurse. This person is very well off, has a HUGE house, both, she and her husband make over $400,000 per year. When "Ms. Rich" was pregnant and on bedrest, she called my friend to come visit and when my friend got there, Ms. Rich wants to go shopping, saying "I'll be okay with you because you are an RN". This set warning bells through me and I told my friend that I would beware, because this woman expects superhuman intervention if something happens to her. She went anyhow, no incident involved. There are a few more stories like this, where she seems to think that my friend is her wet nurse, basically, and I feel that people like this are trouble.

Now, close to a year later, Ms. Rich's mother is diagnosed with lung cancer and is admitted to a rehab center or nursing home, I believe. My friend goes with Ms. Rich often to visit her mom and went yesterday evening. My friend calls me this morning and tells me that she is very uncomfortable about something. She said that the mother was crying and saying that she was VERY uncomfortable. My friend turns her over and sees feces, and immediately, she can tell that this woman was severly impacted. Ms. Rich is crying her eyes out, and my friend proceeds to digitize her. A huge load of feces comes out, mom feels better and is able to sleep. I tell her that she is INSANE!! I said to her that she had no chart, no history of this woman, no doctor's orders. What if this woman had a cardiovascular problem that she was not aware of, and was digitized? I told her that then, Ms. Rich would have no problems suing the pants off of my friend, because THEN, she could have said that she knew better as an RN. I told her that what I would have done is insist that the nurses employed come to see this, call a physician and get an order for THEM to do it, because they have the history.

I also believe that by doing this, and the mother was relieved, again, Ms. Rich would ALWAYS want my friend to come with her to visit mom, because she feels that she 'has her own nurse' to care for her mother, ask countless medical questions, cause confrontations with the staff at the place because suddenly, she will feel educated because of my friend. I told her that everything is okay until something happens and then, the friendship and supposed loyalty will go out of the window.

Opinions? Tell me I'm crazy? Anything...

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

You're not crazy. I would drop this type of "friend" from my life altogether.

I do not have time to render free nursing services to a so-called "friend" who doesn't seem to be reciprocating the favors in return.

Addendum: when I think of the rich "friend," the words "leach" and "user" come to mind.

[leslie :-D]

i agree 100% with your concerns.

even if they are friends, as a nurse, this rn should know better.

it sounds like you have done all you can.

let's pray that all involved, remain healthy.

leslie

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

I told her that there was no way I would have done this, especially from such an unappreciative associate. I am leery of people as well as broke. I need my license and a clear head. Nursing is all I know, and would not compromise myself with a situation like that.

[RN1982]

I just had this issue with my sister. My sister's boyfriend's brother is in the hospital I work at because he needed to have his knee drained. Well I guess he got to the 24hr obs unit and the nurse was waiting for orders for IV and the usual. My sister started text messaging me about "why haven't they put an IV in, blah blah". I told her I can't go down there to that unit "and make things happen" because I have an acutely ill patient of my own to care for.

I'd drop that friend like a sick-nasty habit. They would be no friend of mine. I can't stand when people ask me for advice. I get irked if my own mother asks me (and then doesn't listen to me).

[pattycakeRN]

Why would you willingly digitize someone you didn't have to?

Nasty AND bad for your license.

[SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN]

I cetainly wouldn't be this woman's "friends." But there's something about this your friend isn't telling you, and I don't know what it is.

[leslie :-D]

Why would you willingly digitize someone you didn't have to?

i agree.

i found that to be very odd.

leslie

[RN1982]

let me use the least words to describe how I feel about your friend disimpacting her friend's mom:

[caliotter3]

I can't believe that an RN would commit this kind of professional breach in a facility where she was not employed. She is sorely in need of some enlightenment herself regarding criminal battery charges and complaints against her license. There is something very wrong with this entire relationship.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

On the other hand it's a shame a a friend can't provide a basic comfort measure in an obviously distressed patient without fear of loosing her license and being sued and judged.

She should have notified the staff to take care of it ASAP.

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

That's what I say, tell the staff. There are things that even "Ms Rich' may not know about her own mother (hey, HIPPA, ya know??), and my friend took it upon herself to intervene when it was clearly not appropriate.