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Why do some nurses use their titles as a big ego boost?

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Specifically talking in social settings. I understand if you're at work or at a job interview, your title needs to be specified. I have a friend who I've been doing pre-reqs with years back. Our goal was always BSN. We took different paths and now she is an RN and I just finished my LPN. I feel like she rubs it in my face alot with the distinction of LPN. Instead of asking about NCLEX, she'll say, "how was your test for LPN?" "Are you going to continue on to be an LPN?" "Are there any LPN jobs you can find?" She loves that distinction. It's petty, it's catty, it's typical female behavior and I try not to let it get the best out of me but's frustrating sometimes.

I'm sure all of you understand that not every nursing path is the same and is different. Everyone has their own goals and a difference of degree doesn't make you a better nurse. I was included in a conversation of new grads at an ICU (where my mom happens to be one of the older ones that DO take care of the young). One nurse was in her 30's and said, "Why should I get a master's? It's all preference, honestly. In the real world, people can care less about how many degrees you have. At the end of the day, you're a nurse. your co-workers judge you on how you work with everyone else...how you are with your own patients and how you are with your fellow co-workers. No one could care less about a masters"

This is what I go by and this is what drives me. If it's anything I learned in psch of mental health nursing, there's a thing called "defense mechanisms" haha (if you all remember). Sometimes people who compete are compensating for something else.... I'm not going to go there. I think it's cool when people have goals and continue on with education - more power! But it shouldn't be used to boost their own ego...

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia. Has 40 years experience.

What, exactly, is wrong with 'boosting one's own ego'?

And what is wrong with making a distinction between an RN and an LPN? There is a distinction (I have been both). So what? How is that de-valuing you? It is what it is.

And when I earned my MSN- I was very proud of the work and effort I put forth to earn that degree. It DID make me a better nurse. Better than I was, not better than anyone else currently is. Why is this wrong?

I don't think your "friend" is boosting her ego. She is denigrating you. I work with many NP's in my practice. But, they don't call themselves nurse practitoners. They won't use the word "nurse".

I don't think your "friend" is boosting her ego. She is denigrating you. I work with many NP's in my practice. But, they don't call themselves nurse practitoners. They won't use the word "nurse".

I'm sorry, I don't quite understand. If a nurse practitioner doesn't call herself a nurse practitioner, what does she say? I would assume, perhaps "nurse". But you say they WON'T use the word 'nurse'. So what the heck are they?

uRNmyway, ASN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg.

I agree with marycarney. Talking about your achievements is great.(because that's what they are, achievements. Anyone that chooses to continue their education and succeeds, that is an achievement worthy of mention).

I think if you are taking it that personally, it might be because YOU are feeling inadequate. You might be feeling like you didn't achieve as much, and so you find it necessary to criticize those who proudly speak of what they did. I don't know, but it seems kinda like the pot calling the kettle black if you are talking about nurses with more education who are trying to compensate for something...

uRNmyway, ASN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg.

Ugh, I can just see this turning into another LPN vs RN vs BSN vs MSN vs APN thread. Why do these keep being allowed on AN?

mclennan, BSN, RN

Specializes in CCM, PHN. Has 8 years experience.

What, exactly, is wrong with 'boosting one's own ego'?

And what is wrong with making a distinction between an RN and an LPN? There is a distinction (I have been both). So what? How is that de-valuing you? It is what it is.

And when I earned my MSN- I was very proud of the work and effort I put forth to earn that degree. It DID make me a better nurse. Better than I was, not better than anyone else currently is. Why is this wrong?

I completely agree with this. I'm so sick of LPNs with BIG LITTLE chips on their shoulders, angry at the world because other nurses DARE to have more education and make more money than they do. Spare us the cliche. Either respect RNs & quit seeing every single thing they do as some personal affront or blow to your (apparently delicate) self-esteem, or zip your lip and get your butt back into school.

Maybe when YOU have YOUR RN you'll understand how annoying it is to hear the same OLD, TIRED whining from LPNs about this issue. The best way to get over your resentment about OTHER PEOPLE HAVING MORE EDUCATION than you is to GO GET that education! If you refuse or can't, then figure out a different way to deal with the idea that YA MIGHT WORK with people sometimes who HAD MORE SCHOOL than you. Seems like a COLOSSAL waste of your energy and a totally pointless thing to be angry about.

Seriously. It's ALWAYS embittered LPNs blubbering about RNs who start these arguments and I wish you'd all just stop. STOP embarrassing yourselves and STOP perpetuating your own unfortunately self-marginalizing stereotype. You're doing ALL LPNs a disservice by acting like jealous children.

canoehead, BSN, RN

Specializes in ER. Has 30 years experience.

This thread is going nowhere but down.

If she's playing one-up on you she's only making herself look bad. I wouldn't give her a second thought.

nursel56

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty. Has 34 years experience.

To be honest with you unless she used a sarcastic tone I don't see anything wrong with what she said.

As far as whether someone should be allowed to express an opinion that's been expressed before here, there are a few other topics that return as the undead over and over, related to pecking order and turf wars. People can normally determine the gist of these pretty quickly and stop reading at that point.

How is it offensive to ask if you plan to continue to be an LPN? I ask my friends questions about their lives and plans: it's part of keeping up to date on what's happening in their lives. And given the economy, for RNs, new grads, and considering that many places in my area no longer employ LPNs, asking how you're doing on the job front seems like fair concern. But I guess I usually come from the assumption that my friends care about me and my wellbeing. I'm seeing more of a sensitivity on your part than passive aggression on your friend's.

They call themselves "practitioners" or "clinicians". They have a distinct loathing of nurses.

TakeTwoAspirin, MSN, RN, APRN

Specializes in Peri-op/Sub-Acute ANP.

If you are so comfortable with the path you chose for yourself, why do you care so much? Fly your flag proud, and let her do the same.

Don't know why everyone's acting brand new and acting like they don't see what the OP is trying to say.

Why couldn't the friend say how was your nursing test? Or did you find a job yet? Why throw the LPN in there. Seems silly to me. I think the OP knows what she is.

I know some people on social networks put RN or BSN behind their name on facebook or Instagram. I'm like why? Lol

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma. Has 41 years experience.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

I just told my daughter the other day when someone was mean to her at school. Those people who have to make others feel bad to make themselves feel better have very low self esteem and feel very bad about themselves.

I also told her that real friends celebrate their friends accomplishments whether getting a job as a sanitation engineer or CEO at some fortune 500 company.

Consider the source and move on.....:)

Tait, MSN, RN

Specializes in Acute Care Cardiac, Education, Prof Practice. Has 14 years experience.

I have a feeling your degree is not the only place she pokes at.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

I just told my daughter the other day when someone was mean to her at school. Those people who have to make others feel bad to make themselves feel better have very low self esteem and feel very bad about themselves.

I also told her that real friends celebrate their friends accomplishments whether getting a job as a sanitation engineer or CEO at some fortune 500 company.

Consider the source and move on.....:)

Exactly!

Ah, I was going to say something but it's pretty much already been said. I used to tell my kids that it's stupid to spend time with people who make you feel bad. Unless you really enjoy being ::this close:: to being a troll on this subject, back slowly away from this person and get on with your life, and don't think you have to be whining about this anymore. Really. It says more about you than about her.

As for the rest of us who did go to more school, did earn degrees and certifications, and are better nurses because of it... well, you'll never know how that feels unless you do it too.

Although I do feel proud of my hard work, I didn't do it to make other people feel bad.

It's not a zero-sum game. Some people just seem like they gotta feel bad if someone else is in a better position, I guess. However, if the perennially-aggrieved don't like looking at the alphabet soup in my signature, they don't have to look.

Also, if you really are good friends, tell her you you feel and how her behavior is affecting you... Having a conversation about it might be more beneficial than complaining on AN...