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Why don't nurses bond?

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I have been marathon watching Chicago Fire. I have always heard that fire fighters bond and become like family and so far that is what the show portrays. I am just curious, why is it that we nurses (for the most part) do not stick together and bond like most fire fighters do? I have been a nurse for 18yrs and worked in 5 different settings. I have never seen this kind of bonding in my own personal experiences. Actually it has been quite the opposite. In school they pounded it into us to CYA. I thought at the time that we were CYA to avoid lawsuits or problems with management. I never dreamed we had to protect ourselves from each other as well. I hear a lot that it is because the profession is predominately female but I am not sure I believe that. I am sorry if this has been discussed to death just point me to the previous threads and I will be on my way. If anyone cares to share their experiences and opinions about this I would be interested to read them. Thanks

Alex Egan, LPN, EMT-B

Specializes in Home Health (PDN), Camp Nursing. Has 9 years experience.

Yea don't base what happens in real life based on what happens on TV. I assure you firefighters have as much drama as healthcare.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia. Has 44 years experience.

And firefighters live/ eat/ sleep /work together for 24 hour shifts. I don't want to bond with my co-workers.

RNperdiem, RN

Has 14 years experience.

Nursing jobs have a fairly high turnover. It is hard to bond with people who are leaving soon.

Building relationships takes time; nurses have limited time at work to "bond" with coworkers. Now some nurses do get together outside of work, which is fine, but not everyone is interested. After 12 hours I am ready to go home.

nursel56

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty. Has 45 years experience.

I think the shared possibility of injury and/or death makes that bond imperative, although I'm not sure if it happens naturally or is a major component of fire-fighter training.

A profession I've thought about in terms of nursing is one I see in aviation where interpersonal strife in the crew can lead to catastrophe, , or an extremely "rank-conscious" crew where the crash could have been prevented if the junior crew member had acted on their knowledge of imminent danger and seized control of the situation. They have a program called "Cockpit Resource Management" to try and avoid those things.

Miss Infermiera2b, BSN, RN

Specializes in Med/Surg, Oncology. Has 2 years experience.

Yea don't base what happens in real life based on what happens on TV. I assure you firefighters have as much drama as healthcare.

My friends in the fire/paramedic biz have told me that the drama is absolutely insane. Lots of politics and backstabbing.

Alex Egan, LPN, EMT-B

Specializes in Home Health (PDN), Camp Nursing. Has 9 years experience.

My friends in the fire/paramedic biz have told me that the drama is absolutely insane. Lots of politics and backstabbing.

Yea partners and crews get together until they don't. Then someone sleeps with someone else's wife, or the local fire **** (woman who enjoys many partners in the same social group) wants to try sliding down all the poles in the station. Then some poor dude gets a blanket party. Alternatively you could wake up to your partner pleasuring himself on the other end of a sectional sofa while you were sleeping... And the tv is off. That's a long shift to finish out, no bond was formed. I once found an engineer tied to a backboard in the bay because he left a mess in the bathroom and the new guys finally revolted about pulling cleanup duty.

seriously if you could see the disciplinary reports I have had to sign you would not believe Chicago Fire any more than you believed ER or Grays Anatomy

TheCommuter, BSN, RN

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych. Has 15 years experience.

I have been marathon watching Chicago Fire.
This is the problem with using TV for something other than entertainment purposes. Chicago Fire is entertainment, not an accurate representation of real life.

Likewise, medical shows such as House and Scrubs are entertainment, yet members of the public watch TV and believe this is how care is really delivered in hospitals. Do you see the road upon which I am traveling to illustrate the similarities?

TV is entertainment. Most TV programs, even the 'reality' shows, are not accurate in their representations of real life. Continue to be entertained by Chicago Fire, but do not mistake it as real life.

Karou

Specializes in Med-Surg. Has 1 years experience.

Well, I don't know how fair it is to say "firefighters are bonded like family", and nurses aren't. There is plenty of drama within their profession also. TV probably isn't the best resource.

If we do go off the assumption that all fire stations are close knit and bonded, there are some valid reasons why that could be true. They work longer consecutive hours together. They shower and eat together. There are more downtime periods to get personal and bond, relax, talk family, ect.. That's because of 24hr shifts. Once you are stationed, you usually stay for a long time. Way less job hopping than nursing. Less diversity (from personal observations) than in healthcare. By that I mean that a certain type of person aims to be a firefighter, they seem to have a lot in common with each other which makes bonding easier.

There can be a lot of competitive attitude and drama though. Mostly centered around women. Lots of ego to go around. Just my general observations from having family members who are firefighters.

QuarterLife88, MSN, RN, NP

Specializes in Neuroscience. Has 8 years experience.

I grow tired and frustrated about the social commentary and misogyny that women are inherently drama filled, gossipy, evil beings who can't form friendships, Really? Why is it that when men gossip, no one says a word, but a woman is a *****? Why is it that when men compete against other men for jobs and positions, it's all in good fun, but women are vindictive and catty? The biggest smack-talkers I know at my place of employment are men, and yet no one calls them out on it or says men as a whole are drama starters because of one person like what happens to women all of the time. It's so sad that the patriarchy has poisoned society into believing that women can't get along with each other (even other women believe this crap!). Bull. All of my friends are women and proud of it.

Point being? Everyone is different. Put a bunch of humans in a room together for long periods of time, male or female, and there will be butting of heads, conflict of interest, and yes, even some bonding. That is real life.

Edited by dianah
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loriangel14, RN

Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

My coworkers are my extended family. I guess it depends on where you work.

I've always had good, close working relationships with at least some of the nurses in the places in which I've worked.

Whispera, MSN, RN

Specializes in psych, addictions, hospice, education.

There has been bonding between nurses everywhere I've worked. We always had each others' backs...

kakamegamama

Specializes in MCH,NICU,NNsy,Educ,Village Nursing.

My coworkers are my extended family. I guess it depends on where you work.

I worked in a unit once that was like that. It began at the unit director's level, and I think that sets the unit up for bonding. She led by example.

KelRN215, BSN, RN

Specializes in Pedi. Has 10 years experience.

I have been marathon watching Chicago Fire. I have always heard that fire fighters bond and become like family and so far that is what the show portrays.

It's a TV show. On ER, the characters only hung around with each other and all married/had babies with people they met at work. In the real world, people have lives outside of work.

Ruby Vee, BSN

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching. Has 40 years experience.

I have been marathon watching Chicago Fire. I have always heard that fire fighters bond and become like family and so far that is what the show portrays. I am just curious, why is it that we nurses (for the most part) do not stick together and bond like most fire fighters do? I have been a nurse for 18yrs and worked in 5 different settings. I have never seen this kind of bonding in my own personal experiences. Actually it has been quite the opposite. In school they pounded it into us to CYA. I thought at the time that we were CYA to avoid lawsuits or problems with management. I never dreamed we had to protect ourselves from each other as well. I hear a lot that it is because the profession is predominately female but I am not sure I believe that. I am sorry if this has been discussed to death just point me to the previous threads and I will be on my way. If anyone cares to share their experiences and opinions about this I would be interested to read them. Thanks

You're kidding, right? Nothing like sweeping generalizations based on binge watching a TV show!

OK, I'll bite.

Your assumption seems to be that nurses DON'T bond. I have not found that to be the case. However, you're never going to find examples of bonding in real life to rival a TV show where the characters have NO life outside of their interactions with their cast mates. In every place I've worked, the "characters" (my colleagues) have life outside the workplace.

Emergent, RN

Specializes in ER. Has 28 years experience.

My workplace is slated to become a new reality show on the discovery channel. We are really cool and have bonded as well as firefighters or the characters from any other TV show!

Farawyn

Has 25 years experience.

My workplace is slated to become a new reality show on the discovery channel. We are really cool and have bonded as well as firefighters or the characters from any other TV show!

Are you serious? Squeeeeee!