I have been reading these boards on and off for a few years but have recently joined. Most of the time, I enjoy the posts but some posters have become so ill tempered. They act as if they are superior and downright rude. What is the point? Why attack a nursing student who is posting in the correct area? Why talk down to them, as if they are small children? Or that their concerns are less important because they are new to all of this, and not experienced?
I've been reading posts about "experienced" nurses being attack by the new graduate, or the young nurses questioning people. While, these are all valid points and should be addressed, it is not only happening "out in the real world", it is alive and kicking on this board.
What happened to compassion? Aren't we as nurses and future nurses supposed to display care, compassion and understanding to people? Or have I completely missed the mark on what type of person a nurse should/could be?
If someone is having a horrible day and they are venting, why is it not OK for them to vent here, with people who understand????? I simply do not understand this. I also have no idea how anyone else feels, but I avoid posting most of the time because I do not need to deal with the people who live on their pedestals and look down at everyone else. (I am sure by me posting this I am opening a can of worms)
Didn't someone already NETY? (If that's what we're waiting for...)
I'm a little slow to the obvious sometimes, but I just figured out what NETY means. Lol. I always saw it on threads and just sort of skipped over it as an inside joke. I guess I'm in the club now...yay!
Maybe there should be some kind of coded system to the posts. Perhaps symbols that say, "sarcasm," "venting," "joking," etc. Though I'm a newer member and a student, I am not new to life. I have definitely seen situations where OPs are told to put their big girl pants on and suck it up - which is a perfectly valid piece of advice - but the OP sometimes just wants to commiserate. Reading these. boards has shown me that one needs to be clear as to what one wants, and they should express it, but they should be prepared for realistic advice they don't want to hear. If someone posts that they're failing and wants advice, they should be clear if they want sympathy or solutions.
I was simply giving examples, because a lot of the people here, particularly in the student forums, seem to think that just being matter-of-fact equates to rudeness. I agree with you that there is a difference between outright rudeness that contributes nothing and just matter of fact responses that just don't happen to tell the OP what they want to hear. I've been jumped several times about the Texas example, told I am negative because I am honest about the job market. The DNR example is a real life example that is pertinent to nursing practice, which is the premise for allnurses.com and a basis for interactions when here. Of course I do not think DNR and this forum are anywhere near equal. Which honestly makes my point for me.
I understand your point but I guess what I was trying to say is that I didn't think the op was talking about those kind of posts that you were using as an example. Those may be what you have experienced recently so that is what comes to mind but as for me I have seen just blatantly rude posts that that do not serve any purpose and those were what sprang to my mind when I read the op.
I am by far not a young student nor am I new to the real world. Nursing is my third career, but has always been something I wanted to do. No, I do not want rainbows and sunshine, that’s just completely out of the realm of reality. I could sit here for hours copying and pasting the posts that are perfect examples of what IS rude but there is no point in calling these people out over it. It would only serve to cause more rude posts and personal attacks.
All of us are educated people, and we have all taken some form of writing classes. I know for a fact in these classes, my professors were very clear on how people should present themselves in their writing form. Someone references how it could be consisted “safe”, some can say its writing with class and respect of others or bluntness. I have no issue with people being blunt, I actually prefer it. I was more or less referring to the posts that are personal attacks, that make a person feel stupid. Personally, before I post anything on the numerous boards I am on, I stop and make sure I have, 1. I try to answer their question, 2. I never respond with personal attacks 3. I attempt to keep it professional and respectful.
I wanted to thank everyone who responded, and to those who have also displayed the same concern for the rudeness :yelclap:.
For the record, all of you that have posted up until now, have never come across as rude in your posts (from my perspective). I do find it interesting that the extremely rude people have skimmed over this and did not respond. :doh:
In comparison to other forums, there is little to no rudeness. The standard is obviously set much higher here and the rules are strictly enforced, e.g., no flaming. Perhaps, you need thicker skin.
In comparison to other forums, there is little to no rudeness as you put it. The standard is obviously set much higher here and the rules are strictly enforced, e.g., no flaming. Perhaps, you need thicker skin.
Idk.. Personally, i have seem people get rude on here many times. and I have a thick skin.
Telling a person to suck it up is not sound advice. if they were able to do that why bother posting in the first place?? you should not dismiss a person's feelings.... Unless they become annoying and beat a dead horse. For ex...
Ex. OP was devastated about getting a C in a nine credit class and was contemplating dropping out bc he/she felt they were far too deep in the hole and grad school was out of the question. Ok, that post was a bit dramatic, but many offered sound advice until the OP refuted this advice many times and continued to beat a dead horse. then the commenters weren't so nice and started to get annoyed with the OP and it showed in the comments.
Then again, rudeness is subject to interpretation.
a time or two, but it isn't a common occurrence, or the majority way.
why isn't it? even though, that isn't what i said; i'll ask out of curiosity.
i was speaking generally.
could you be coherent, please?
when an op starts a thread about something that is troubling them, i assume that they did not have the strength to "suck it up" or they would not have posted in the first place.
i was merely making a suggestion and giving my opinion on the matter. in other words, you're mischaracterizing my post.
i was speaking generally and my response was not an attack against you at all.
well, then why is someone being a nuisance to you ample enough to "dismiss a person's feelings." let's see your line of reasoning.
it's not just a person being annoying... how do i explain this.....
ok, (true story)
if literally 20 people comment and give respectful sound advice and the op's only response is "but i got 3 c's!" the issue had already been addressed 20 times. that would make a commenter feel like the op is just playing games or seeking attention and is not serious about resolving the matter. at that time, i could understand why commenters would be frustratedand dismiss the issue bc the person is just dragging it out and not taking great advice.
a person is dying of thirst. they say, help me! i'm dying of thirst! you search high and low and finally find them a bottle of water. they look at it, then look at you and continue to say "im dying of thirst!" you hand them the bottle 20 times, they refuse to take it but they continue to say "im dying of thirst!" after a while, you might walk away, or say "you're dying of thirst bc you wont drink the water in giving you, you idiot!!"
your response is a prime example. i did not think i was attacking you at all, but you thought i was (i think). sorry. i guess its all about how we interpret things. bc of that, i believe there will always be some hostility on an.
your response is a prime example. i did not think i was attacking you at all, but you thought i was (i think). sorry. i guess its all about how we interpret things. bc of that, i believe there will always be some hostility on an.
i never insinuated you were "attacking" me. however, you led me to believe you had a differing opinion, because you quoted me and said things contradictory to what i said.
on a side note, it's wise to refrain from quoting someone, if you're speaking generally and not directly.
I never insinuated you were "attacking" me. However, you led me to believe you had a differing opinion, because you quoted me and said things contradictory to what I said.
On a side note, it's wise to refrain from quoting someone, if you're speaking generally and not directly.
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Purple_Scrubs, BSN, RN
1 Article; 1,978 Posts
I'm a little slow to the obvious sometimes, but I just figured out what NETY means. Lol. I always saw it on threads and just sort of skipped over it as an inside joke. I guess I'm in the club now...yay!