Why all the drama with nursing?

[dogmom2016]

Argh, my friends, just argh! I'm getting home after my week of night shifts and I'm tired and frustrated. Oh, I love my job and that's not being sarcastic but why does nursing seem to attract all the drama queens? I'm just blowing off steam here and maybe I'll give you all a grin early to start your weekend: So, at the end of my shift my boss calls me and is angry. Seems the newest nurse hired to work a certain shift has decided she wants my shift instead. Due to the fact I went back to school this semester, that night shift works best for me - and is truly the shift I love! - my dad is terminally ill, etc...I told her I want to keep my shift. She blew over the phone telling me several not very nice things about my attitude and that she can't guarantee I would keep my shift. I asked why the new hire got to decide I would be the one getting the shift boot in the butt and how come she wasn't expected to work what she got hired to work. I had to work swing until 'my' night shift opened up. Guess that was the wrong thing to say. More choice comments followed. Now I'm tired as heck, typing this to blow off steam, and wondering why I seem to be the object of my boss's ire here. Hubby thinks the boss wants me to quit. Dog-gone it, though, I love this job. Guess I have to see what happens when I see the boss again. It's all clear as mud to me. I don't want to look for another job right now with school and stuff but I suppose I could if I have to. What happened to management appreciating an RN with a strong work ethic who wants to do the job she was assigned? Argh, again! Have a great weekend everyone!

[Crush]

Stand your ground. You have seniority. Totally understand where you are coming from though. I've had a similar situation in the past. Best wishes.

[VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN]

Crush---love the avatar!

[dogmom2016]

Thank you, OldDude, for your insight! No, actually I am the only FTE staff RN who 'floats'. I do it for the reasons you stated and because the boss guilts me into it. About a month ago I started saying no because I am worn out and after a year I figured I now work a regular shift so I would start sticking up for myself. It didn't go well. We're a small facility with only a handful of nurses. I am not confrontational or aggressive but I am honest to a fault and I have a niggling feeling that's part of the problem. I don't butt kiss well.

[Mavrick, BSN, RN]

Yes it is sad but true. If you are reliably the one to cave-in then they will keep coming to you. Management has no spine and will always take the path of least resistance. You really have to set your own boundaries. You don't have to be a hard ass but you do have to let them know when you mean NO.

If you had child care issues or transportation issues that limit your shift work to what you are currently working then you would just say, with a heavy sigh, that you would love to help them out but just can't.

You are tired now and not in the mood to see too much of the other side but the new hire is probably just trying to negotiate for the best possible shift while she is in the best possible position to get it. It's not the new hire's fault that she is better at getting the message across to your wimpy manager that she "just can't do anything else but your shifts" I'm sorry your wimpy manager is using the ole manipulative technique of "not a team player" on you but since you ARE such a team player she is thinking it will work.

When you regain your strength and get back in the ring, prepare a succinct "I won't be able to do that" argument. You might be more flexible after you complete school but not now. Try not to over explain and keep the drama to a minimum yourself.

Best of luck and I truly hope you get to keep your shifts and score one for yourself. Managers (like children) need to know where your limits are. You have to be the one to tell them and enforce it. You always have the option to walk. It just doesn't have to be the first one.

[Munch]

You said you think your boss wants you to quit...don't give your boss the satisfaction especially because you really do love your job. Only consider quitting if things become really miserable. Ive had bosses make demands at me just because they thought they could get away with it. I definitely used to be a doormat but once I stood my ground the shenanigans and unreasonable requests stopped. No reason why the new hire should be given your shift...we were all new once and worked the schedules we agreed to when we were hired.

[AnnieNP, MSN, NP]

A great response is "that doesn't work for me". Nothing else, no excuses, don't give them anything else to read into it.

[TriciaJ, RN]

Yes, I agree with above posters. The new hire is being a squeaky wheel and your weak manager is taking the path of least resistance. At least it used to be the path of least resistance. Now that you are asserting yourself she is enraged because you're the one she counts on to cave. This happens to a lot of people who finally start being assertive after getting tired of carrying more than their load.

Good advice to say "That doesn't work for me" and leave it at that. Watch her huff and puff before she gets it and figures out a plan that doesn't include dropping all her problems in your lap. You may feel a few twinges of guilt but you'll get over it.

[cyc0sys]

Yes, I agree with above posters. The new hire is being a squeaky wheel and your weak manager is taking the path of least resistance. At least it used to be the path of least resistance. Now that you are asserting yourself she is enraged because you're the one she counts on to cave. This happens to a lot of people who finally start being assertive after getting tired of carrying more than their load.

Good advice to say "That doesn't work for me" and leave it at that. Watch her huff and puff before she gets it and figures out a plan that doesn't include dropping all her problems in your lap. You may feel a few twinges of guilt but you'll get over it.

Weak manager is absolutely right. The title of the thread should be, 'Why is there such a shortage of good nurse managers?'.

If your UM is going to play those kinds of games for a newbie and you're a performer, she isn't going to support you when SHTF. Also sounds to me like it is some kind of personality parade, if they're ganging up together.

"That doesn't work for me" and leave it at that.

[Nurse Beth, MSN]

Seems the newest nurse hired to work a certain shift has decided she wants my shift instead. Due to the fact I went back to school this semester, that night shift works best for me - and is truly the shift I love! - my dad is terminally ill, etc...I told her I want to keep my shift. She blew over the phone telling me several not very nice things about my attitude and that she can't guarantee I would keep my shift. though, I love this job.

"Thank you for checking with me to see if I'd like to change shifts. No, thank you."

[OldDude]

"Thank you for checking with me to see if I'd like to change shifts. No, thank you."

This is similar to what I say when called by the Urgent Care where I work pool. "No, but thanks for thinking of me." No explanation...end of story.

[SpankedInPittsburgh, DNP, RN]

Yeah. Lots of good advice here. Often I think "drama" serves as a red herring & smoke screen to distract from the real issue. Here the issue is pretty simple. You have been at your job doing good work for a long time. You have been flexible in an attempt to meet the needs of the unit. You can't do it now. No drama just facts

[ribyncutter]

Cross your I's and Dot your T's if your boss wants this they will push and may try to push you out of there, over "something" you did. Realistically, that employee is probably not going to work out. Their a new hire and they want a new shift already. Hmmmmm? Document the whole thing, including everything that was said it may serve you well.