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Why Do Nurses Eat Their Own?

Nurses Article   (95,338 Views | 293 Replies | 634 Words)
by nrsgofold nrsgofold, RN (New) New

nrsgofold has 20 years experience as a RN and specializes in ER,ICU.

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As current times have shown, we're short staffed. Administration wants to make money. So cuts are made to equipment and man power. Who has your back? Who can you rely on? Your fellow nurses? I'm not so sure anymore. Why do we as nurses eat our own when we should be teaching them and guarding them as our own. The fact is as we age our young nurses are going to be taking care of us, but there are those all too eager beavers who will in fact burn you. This is my experience. You are reading page 14 of Why Do Nurses Eat Their Own?. If you want to start from the beginning Go to First Page.

Farawyn has 25 years experience and specializes in A little bit of everything..

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You're right. To me nursing is about serving our patients. The reason I exist is to serve my patients. In my opinion, from what I observe, nurses who aren't interested in service or looking for a big paycheck are more likely to be the nurses who miss things or bully their colleagues or get wrapped up in looking good. They are more likely to lose compassion, if they had any to begin with. They are more likely to be unhappy in their work. To me, nursing is not about money. I feel such sadness for my colleagues who dismiss the ideas of humility and service in nursing.

If you want some evidence and empirical data, I can provide some that shows that nurses who are more selfishly driven or plain not nice are more likely to be sued by patients when they make small mistakes as humans are apt to do, particularly ones who just show up for a paycheck.

Sorry you work with crap people. Again.

I don't need evidence. I live my life and I have my own experiences. I put out good and hard work and I've mostly gotten it back.

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JimmyDurham9 has 6 years experience and specializes in Ambulatory Care, LTC, OB, CCU, Occ Hth.

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Sorry you work with crap people. Again.

I don't need evidence. I live my life and I have my own experiences. I put out good and hard work and I've mostly gotten it back.

I don't doubt you. I'm just asking you to not dismiss this issue simply because you've gotten lucky.

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Hollybobs has 5 years experience and specializes in ICU.

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Okay, I have a few examples of my experiences too- all at the hands of different boomer, gen-y, gen-x, and millennial nurses. I wasn't going to post all this but I'd like a little balance. And I have had lateral violence directed at me, it just hasn't been the majority of my experience, quite the opposite. I'm really sorry for those nurses who have experienced it frequently, I'd hate that too.

1)A mentor patiently offering to show me for the 5th time how to prep an iv line as a clumsy student.

2)A co-worker offering to swap a difficult assignment that I had 3 times in a row despite her being unwell.

3)After handover, receiving full understanding for all the jobs not done after busy shift- and a hug too.

4)A senior (older!) colleague who went out of her way to recommend I pursue a promotion.

5)A charge nurse who stayed back after her shift on multiple occasions hen she had her family waiting to help me complete paperwork for extra study. She would also ferociously defend any of "her nurses' from unjust criticism by relatives, Dr's etc.

6)A colleague who listened and didn't blame me for my part in a conflict and that way helped me learn.

7)All the many, many nurses who helped me learn new skills without expecting anything in response.

8)A new colleague (younger!) who started the job at the same time as me but had more experience of the specialty, helping me with all the new paperwork and processes without letting anyone know she was doing this.

9)Every good piece of advice I've had. All the role-models for treating other colleagues with respect and dignity at all times.

10)The manager who went over and above to try to put in place a system that would enable me to stay in my last workplace and also help my health issue.

11)All the nurses who have understood instinctively that I can be shy but I'm not without some ability and encouraged me.

12)ALWAYS being supported and comforted after deaths/codes, no matter how busy we were.

Edited by traumaRUs

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Farawyn has 25 years experience and specializes in A little bit of everything..

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I don't doubt you. I'm just asking you to not dismiss this issue simply because you've gotten lucky.

You don't think my sparkling personality had anything to do with it?

I don't have great co-workers and friends because I got lucky. I have them because I AM one.

If you hate your job, leave. Your chip on your shoulder is loud and clear.

Go to the next job. You may find someone like me who puts in an effort to work WITH people.

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JimmyDurham9 has 6 years experience and specializes in Ambulatory Care, LTC, OB, CCU, Occ Hth.

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So, you can say what you want and make all kinds of judgements because you were bullied but if someone disagrees with you they are called out for snark? Are you reading? You don't seem to be able to see the forest for the trees.

I saw no disagreement; that poster had issue with my points and dismissed evidence I provided on the grounds of refusing to read "jargon." Further implying that the ANA was out to cook up whatever points it wanted as if it was some domineering organization seeking to manipulate people with "jargon"

I merely pointed out the truth of the matter that nurses are invited and encouraged to participate in their profession and try to change what they don't like.

Stop closing off to issues and information because of "jargon." It's easier to sit back, complain, and play the manipulated victim when you won't research the issues you comment on or participate in projects to correct the problems

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Farawyn has 25 years experience and specializes in A little bit of everything..

2 Followers; 12,645 Posts; 98,011 Profile Views

I saw no disagreement; that poster had issue with my points and dismissed evidence I provided on the grounds of refusing to read "jargon." Further implying that the ANA was out to cook up whatever points it wanted as if it was some domineering organization seeking to manipulate people with "jargon"

I merely pointed out the truth of the matter that nurses are invited and encouraged to participate in their profession and try to change what they don't like.

Stop closing off to issues and information because of "jargon." It's easier to sit back, complain, and play the manipulated victim when you won't research the issues you comment on or participate in projects to correct the problems

I don't complain, and I'm certainly not a victim.

You have no idea what I've done at work and the depth of my career. You don't know me. You don't even know me here.

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JimmyDurham9 has 6 years experience and specializes in Ambulatory Care, LTC, OB, CCU, Occ Hth.

67 Posts; 1,805 Profile Views

You don't think my sparkling personality had anything to do with it?

I don't have great co-workers and friends because I got lucky. I have them because I AM one.

If you hate your job, leave. Your chip on your shoulder is loud and clear.

Go to the next job. You may find someone like me who puts in an effort to work WITH people.

I did leave those jobs. Not everyone is fortunate enough to just pack up and go like that though. I have no chip. I just despise nasty people who make it their mission to torment other people.

I don't believe everyone in nursing is like that. My experience would leave me to believe otherwise, but that's not fair to nurses like you who are good and hard working.

Not everything is black and white. And no one would should have to put up with abuse in their workplace simply because people say "suck it up" "don't like it, leave" when they should say "hey it's not okay to treat humans like that."

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Further implying that the ANA was out to cook up whatever points it wanted as if it was some domineering organization seeking to manipulate people with "jargon"

This is actually how a lot of nurses see the ANA (how they have experienced it over time).

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Jensmom7 has 36 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in Hospice.

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There was, once upon a time, the notion that NPs had years of actual nursing experience. Those in the military were top-shelf. Nowadays, not so much. Sad. I always had such respect for all NPs at one time. Still some good ones around. But they are getting fewer. The schools, now, are laughing all the way to the bank. No one wins, especially the patients.

^^^This. In spades. I thought it was just me, but the NPs I've been running into lately just aren't that good. Some of them seem to think that "Do it because I ordered it" is the best response to another nurse asking them questions.

I had one try to rip me a new one because I asked her opinion, based on her observations of a patient I was evaluating for Hospice. "Why Hospice? Why now?" are questions every Hospice nurse is expected to be able to answer when they attend the every two week Interdisciplinary Team Meetings.

Apparently, this NP took it to mean that I was "questioning" her, when I was merely gathering information to pull the whole case together. When I tried to explain this, she cut me off, and yelled (yes, yelled. At the nurses' station. So professional) "I ordered Hospice! The family authorized Hospice! You START Hospice!"

Yeah. Turned out the spouse wasn't ready for Hospice, and declined the admit. My personal thought? He only agreed in the first place so she would stop harassing him.

I'll never regret my years as a nurse. But I am really starting to look forward to retiring in 6 years, because the older I get, the less BS I feel the need to put up with.

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SnowShoeRN has 10 years experience and specializes in Family Medicine, Tele/Cardiac, Camp.

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And no one would should have to put up with abuse in their workplace simply because people say "suck it up" "don't like it, leave" when they should say "hey it's not okay to treat humans like that."

This is quite true. Despite what people may believe about the validity and overuse of NETY, I think few would disagree that pure abuse - bullying in the real, truest sense of the word - is something that should continue to exist in any profession. I wish you well with your ANA panel and do hope you find yourself in kinder work environments in the future. Best of luck.

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Sorry you work with crap people. Again.

I don't need evidence. I live my life and I have my own experiences. I put out good and hard work and I've mostly gotten it back.

JimmyDurham9 offer evidence to back his assertions, many others on this thread only offer anecdotes and emotions.

The plural of anecdote is NOT data...

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hwy17v has 10 years experience and specializes in ER.

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I'm forced to agree with the above comments about nursing education and its tendency to produce less than well-rounded people.

It is amazing how many ignorant nurses are out there. Tons of them lack writing and critical thinking skills and fail to keep themselves abreast of anything in the world outside nursing. Many nurses don't even know how to play chess or have watched the original Star Wars trilogy. Essentially, nursing is the world to them. Many know nothing of history, literature, politics, or really any other discipline. I majored in both English and Nursing so I know what most nurses are missing as far as a liberal arts background goes, and the amount that many are missing is pretty dreadful. I have a suspicion that many are the same people who, as students, will talk about planning to "brain dump" what they learn in college after they are tested on it. They don't actually care about knowledge for its own sake, just about achieving some financial security.

I wholeheartedly agree with your statement that the type of people attracted to nursing are not knowledge seeking or what I could consider "bright" or "enlightened" individuals. And that is what makes nursing a "trashy" profession in the eyes of many and reinforces its low class underpinnings further. Nurses just don't have the same curiosity about life and well-rounded education that you'd see from doctors, lawyers, and so forth.

Now I know people are going to come at me with statements about how hard nursing school is. Some of nursing school is hard, but much of it is not. Memorizing a whole bunch of anatomy and physiology isn't exactly a sign of brilliance. The so-called "medication math" classes that nurses are required to take are the equivalent of what is taught in middle school algebra: converting fractions to decimals, etc. -- and tons of people STILL fail at it. That's sad. Give most of these "wise, smart, experienced nurses" a seat in a basic calculus class or in organic chemistry and their brains would probably implode. But what else would you expect -- these are the same people who think writing is a useless skill and that it's okay if your spelling and grammar are as bad as a five year old's as long as you are a "wise, smart, experienced nurse."

Perhaps you should stop looking down your nose at your peers and see them as individuals? I am 53 years old and will graduate with my BSN in 2 weeks. I'm old enough to have birthed most of my classmates, and while I feel the generation gap quite often, I take offense at your description of younger nursing students. We are required to take organic chemistry, and an upper division writing course. These are indeed tough classes, and our brains did not implode. I have mentored a few of my classmates through the writing class and felt privileged to be able to help. Most of my classmates are bright and inquisitive and have done very well in clinical experiences. I fail to see how majoring in English or playing chess makes one a more compassionate caregiver. I would rather work with these "trashy" young people than with a nurse with your superior attitude any day of the week.

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