Last week my dad was punched in the face and given a bloody nose while going for a walk in Cambridge, Mass. He has a Grade IV Glioblastoma and is in the ICU now. We are hoping to take him home on hospice tomorrow so he can have Thanksgiving at home.
He's an amazing man who meditates and knows how to listen thoughtfully. During this last part of his illness, he lost half his visual field. He's on steroids to reduce the inflammation. The side effect of the steroids is that he gets restless. His only solace is going for long walks. But he's a proud man and will not carry a blind person's white cane. I suggested it to him last month, not because I thought he was disabled, but so the general public might be a little more careful around him. He refused.
Last week he was walking as usual, when he got a little disoriented. This happens; it's not just being completely blind on the left side, but difficulty tracking movement. When he sees people or things coming toward him, he stops until they pass him. This time he stopped in front of a black teenager. I think the kid misinterpreted why this frail, thin man stopped in front of him. He reacted by punching my dad in the nose. My dad got his bearings and made his way home covered in blood (I think he was only a block or two away).
I implore you, please think first. If you see someone who is "off", take a moment before reacting. Perhaps they are just trying to get their bearings. Not every disability is immediately recognizable.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
I cannot believe ANYONE should be blaming the victim here. What is wrong with people? The guy was victimized and that is the story. There is NO justification for this, no rationalizing it. It's plain disgusting.That teen needs to be brought up on charges and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I would be HORRIFIED if my kids perpetrated such a senseless and evil crime on a helpless person.
OP, I am so sorry this happened. It was wrong, wrong, wrong. I hope he makes a full recovery and my heart goes out to you all. Hugs.
I'm sorry for your dad's attack. I do feel that it is important to remember that every person walking the street doesn't know his condition. What is a normal part of his disease process to his family can come across as 100 things to a stranger especially a layperson. It is impossible to know what the teen was thinking and feeling threatened is sometimes a split second reaction. I also think that including the teens race is what made it hard for some posters to focus on your father. God bless your family.
I'm very sorry that this happened to your dad and I am sorry that your family is going through this. My dad is also ill and I live far away. It is really tough. I hope that you all can have a good Thanksgiving dinner together.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
What kind of person punches the elderly?
Cancer has nothing to do with the situation unless the elderly man in question was wearing a big sign that says "I have cancer" or unless the punching out occurred where he was being treated.
Race has very little to do with the situation as well.
Not having been there, I have no idea what your father may have said to him if anything. I work in gero psych and some of the older people can be quite irritable and cantankerous. It is possible that he may have said something snide to the kid. I am not saying that he did but it is possible.
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
Not having been there, I have no idea what your father may have said to him if anything. I work in gero psych and some of the older people can be quite irritable and cantankerous. It is possible that he may have said something snide to the kid. I am not saying that he did but it is possible.
This is the biggest pile of poo I have read in a long time. The other day at work I had a patient who decided she didnt want to take her pills and spat out a mix of tabs and pills and yogurt. Now, you could have argued provocation however if I'd retaliated I would have been charged with criminal assault, lost my job, most likely my registration, and could have ended up in jail.
Provocation whether real or imagined is no justification for violence. EVER!
Really? Since when is a young male threatened by a frail old man. To punch an older person in the face....really? It is NOT excusable. Give me a break...I'm sorry but that is crazy. If my son would even ever think to act in such a manner I'd lay him out on the floor myself.
We all try to "make " our parents behave but they will do as they wish. My Dad's vision was failing....failed by my standards. He had had several laser surgeries for retinal hemorrhages. He was a member of MENSA my mother is educated as well.
One day I called home (well I called home almost every day) and asked where Dad was...My Mom said...."Oh he went to the store" I asked "How is he getting there?" she responded "The red car"....I flipped out on the phone...as I am texting my sisters about our irresponsible parents and I am ranting at my mother I hear her say "Well....he knows where the bumpers are"...I'm thinking HE WHAT??? I said "So my Dad is driving by braille! REALLY MOTHER!"
That was the last time my Dad drove....THANK GOD he didn't kill any one!
OP...I am so sorry to hear about your Dad. Cambridge! Really? that stinks. I am so sorry your Dad had to go through this.
See, it's the old race card. The young innocent black kid is the target of racial attacks these days from the likes of cops and little old frail men. Haven't you been watching the news?
Seriously, to blame this on the OP father is ridiculous.
Ok, this is ridiculous. OP was upset because someone punched their dad when he was on the street walking. Regardless the race of the teen, they were wrong for punching him.
End of story: they could have said "excuse me" or walked around him.
SmilingBluEyes
20,964 Posts
I cannot believe ANYONE should be blaming the victim here. What is wrong with people? The guy was victimized and that is the story. There is NO justification for this, no rationalizing it. It's plain disgusting.That teen needs to be brought up on charges and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I would be HORRIFIED if my kids perpetrated such a senseless and evil crime on a helpless person.
OP, I am so sorry this happened. It was wrong, wrong, wrong. I hope he makes a full recovery and my heart goes out to you all. Hugs.