When the tables are turned (nurse on the receiving end of care, acted like a fool)

tewdles, RN · Dec 8, 2009

Holy cow! First because you have managed to work as a nurse and did not get the HBV, by choice! Secondly because, well, because you totally lost it over something simple and sort of silly. Are panic attacks something that have troubled you before? Do you have issues with unexpected changes in your work schedule or environment? I would imagine that your manager was impressed by your ability to cope...not in a very positive way. I would recommend that you speak with those involved and apologize for your behavior and hope that it does not adversely affect their confidence in your ability to perform under stressful circumstances!

I am not intending to be judgemental with this post, just realistic. Good luck.

birdgardner · Dec 8, 2009

I've never panicked at a needle myself but I can look at wounds on others that would have me all light-headed and tasting blood if they were on me. Being chased can't have helped your panic. It really doesn't make sense to force an injection or any treatment on a person over the age of reason, in a non-emergent situation (we're not talking Haldol or epi here). The correct response is to back off, wait it out, come back later.

My 4 y.o. son balked at being immunized at the pediatrician's. The nurse got impatient and angry and wanted to force it on him; I said hell no and took him out to the waiting room and discussed the immune system with him - the age of reason starts early in my house. Half an hour later he sat down like a lamb for the shots and has ever since. Can you imagine if we'd pinned him down, how he'd react to needles and nurses and doctors' offices forever on?

Maybe you had an early bad experience; maybe it's just an out-of-the blue phobia. But you shouldn't be ashamed. Would self-administration have helped? Or desensitization? Or getting it at your own doctor's instead of employee health?

LPN_2005/RN_10 · Dec 8, 2009

Have you always acted like that when you receive injections, or is this a isolated event?

oramar · Dec 8, 2009

I suspect you really did not want that injection. You feel really conflicted becaise you have to get as a term of employment. Your subconscious mind was reacting to what it precieved as a threat. You are not the only one. I acted very badly duirng a breast biopsy about two years ago. It is the only time I have done anything like that in my life. I was screaming and swearing. I am a veteran of many major surgeries and never reacted in a way that was anything out of the ordinary. But the breast biopsy freaked me out. I am not afraid of cancer or death but I dislike torture. It seemed like torture to me. I was very conflicted about having it and was very close to saying "NO". I knew it would be normal and the breast surgeon thought it would be normal also. I was afraid I would be hounded to death by radiologist and other doctors if I didn't go through with it. I have big issues with the whole mammogram/biopsy culture. I suspect you have big issues with the vaccine. I don't think you are crazy or anything.

Batman25 · Dec 8, 2009

Giver yourself a break here. You are human and had a rough time today. You need not be ashamed or so stressed out about this. Let it go and move on. You are far from the first patient to freak a bit about a needle and will be far from the last.

BluegrassRN · Dec 8, 2009

I HATE it. I can give them til the cows come home, I *love* inserting IVs, but I hate hate hate being on the receiving end.

I always tear up, my face flushes, I get hot and dizzy, and my heart races when I get a shot. Sometimes I cry. Imagine how lovely this is when 100% of your shots are given by your coworkers.

Here's how I've gotten around this recently. I've started giving myself my own IM immunizations. In my thigh. I go into the bathroom, drop my pants, sit on the toilet, and jab myself in the VL. I thought it would be a private place to have my little freak out. Except I didn't have a freak out. One little "eep!" and that was it. No flushing, no tears, nothing.

Maybe it's a control issue. When I'm in control of giving the shot, I'm okay. If someone else is doing it, I'm not. Or maybe I'm a drama queen who needs an audience? Who knows? All I know is that if I do it myself, I'm totally okay.

Maybe the next time you need an IM, you can do it yourself. It might go better.

Tait, MSN, RN · Dec 8, 2009

I don't think you have panic attacks.

When I landed my first nursing job I was getting my blood draw done and I was staring at the picture on the wall. The phlebotomist got snarky with me and said,

"For a nurse you sure are panicky about needles."

I just calmly looked at her and said "Well the pictures are on the wall for a reason, too look at"

People seem to assume because we can tolerate watching many situations unfold with our patients that we are somehow super immune to fear of medical procedures.

Running about the room is maybe a bit on the extreme side, however I assume your telling of the story is a bit more entertaining than the actual situation

Maybe next time find a pretty picture to look at on the wall and take a nice deep breath :)

Tait

CBsMommy · Dec 8, 2009

I don't mind getting shots but I don't like getting blood drawn. I can't watch the blood coming out of my own veins or my blood pressure drops and I get very faint. How was the shot though...no big deal right? In another month, when you have to get another shot, take a deep breath and start talking about the weather, every mundane detail. Close your eyes if you have to! Good luck!

kanzi monkey · Dec 8, 2009

It sounds like you have a genuine phobia of needles--when they're pointed at you, that is. Just keep this in mind. If you're ever tardy for a routine immunization, consider why--are you sincerely too busy to schedule an appointment, or are you procrastinating? I'm saying this because I imagine your brain will try to trick you into not receiving the other HBV doses.

It's good to be aware of your response to needles, but I don't think you need to apologize for this instance. Make sure your provider knows about what happened and your worries, and maybe they can make accommodations to help you through the next experience. Also, you could try "bribing" yourself--treat yourself with something you can look forward to AFTER you get your shot.

This seems like a manageable phobia, and there are many things you can do to help yourself in the future. Good luck!

Oh, and I hope you don't mind that I giggled at the part where you ran around the office with holiday music in the background. :)

2shihtzus · Dec 8, 2009

Im exactly the same way......I tried to donate blood one time and I could barely handle the finger stick......I tensed up and started bouncing my feet up and down and whimpering.

And my stupid hemoglobin was too low to donate, so it was for nothing!

KungFuFtr · Dec 8, 2009

In the years I've been a nurse I've never taken the Hepatitis B vaccine, but the NP program I am in requires it now with no if's and's or but's. They gave me the shot at work today and I acted like a total idiot. I don't know how many IM injections I've given in my career as a registered nurse, but I've given MANY. However, when the needle was pointed at me today I freaked out. The DON drew up the injection and after chasing me around the office for several minutes another nurse finally came in and grabbed my other arm and tried to hold me still. By the time it was over I was drenched in sweat and my heart was racing. Looking back, it was kind of funny because while all this was going on a jazz band was in the activity room playing, "It's Beginning to Look Like Christmas."
I'm so ashamed and embarrassed. I would like to know I'm not the only one who freaks out when a needle comes at them.

Are you serious? Your DON chased you while another staff member grabbed you? That's jacked up! If that's not battery, I don't know what is...

I surprised that you can't exempt out of the series.