When group bullying expands from classmates to teachers and administration

[who knows]

I am on a lunch break during clinical, so will provide the basics and followup when possible. Individual bullying ineffective due to lack of intelligence and posed threat. Same story for group bullying. False accusations and various torts follow with no effect. Next step is to extend socialization to educators and attempt to sway perception towards the individual to be bullied towards a demonized view. Educators are swayed and begin to communicate with administration and previous accusations and torts are given more consideration and a particular picture is painted. Bullying still remains ineffective as there is no ground for the expanded circle to firmly stand on and any approach to person to be bullied puts them at risk for multiple legal consequences on their part if not approached carefully. There is much more to the story to include liable from a educator to a individual I have a relationship outside school confines, to critical observation of my toileting times in the clinical setting of a skilled care facility.

[Red Kryptonite]

For someone who said that there must be something wrong with me if I am always under attack, well they are right and there is. I am kind, stubborn, and perceptive. If a person is kind, this puts the person within social subgroup to be approached a specific way and any action they take to be given simular consideration. Once perceptional abilities are added, what others do or don't say or do in response to any act of kindness or humility, provides a detailed picture of the landscape the kind individual is living in at the moment. When stubbornness is added to the equation particularly to not tolerating any form of manipulation or aggression in response to this kindness, things become quite a bit more colorful. People are shown for who they are and if they are unable to recover their pride when they make the mistake of attacking attacking what they thought was a soft target, they may begin to take irrational and emotionally driven actions. I have dealt with this issue of mine from the age of seven on and have read self help books and have seen professionals to try to find an approach that does not ultimately lead to facing hostility from multiple directions. I have never made any progress on this issue other than to change my heart to one that is not kind and all of my problems will be solved and turned into blessings...

Whew...that's quite the histrionic display.

[ixchel]

OP, I'm getting a clearer idea of things from your most recent post. You are different. An odd-bird who feels your different-ness and you feel isolated by it. The way others treat you bothers you, and because you have struggled with this since childhood, you read into things, sometimes more than you should. I can tell you your interpretation of how things have gone in this thread is, in some part, inaccurate. It makes me wonder if you are misinterpreting some of what you are experiencing now on school.

I fear you may take what I am about to say in the wrong way. I mean what I am about to "say" sincerely, and I hope that you believe that. You've made it this far in school, and genuinely, I hope that you succeed, and I offer this advice to contribute to your success.

I think that you might benefit from some counseling. You seem to internalize things that are not meant to be taken so seriously. You may also be making things that aren't supposed to be about you as being about you. Given your misinterpretation of some things in this thread, your view of face to face life may also be misinterpreted, and it sounds like this is becoming a hinderance to your ability to be happy and successful.

Counseling can help you sort through this. Nursing requires a realistic appraisal of the patient's situation in addition to your own. You will burn out quickly at the rate you are going.

[ponymom]

You seem more like an 'emo' high schooler. Just get over it and get through school. Nursing school is the easiest part of this whole nursing thing. Once you get out there and actually working, you'll see how silly this all is.

There's no bullying here. Bullying is being tripped in the hallway, having your car keyed, being spit on and having your lunch stolen.

So you're kind, stubborn and perceptive, big deal. Millions of others are, too, myself included.

I agree with ixchel except I think you've had too much counseling. And leave those self-help books on the shelf, honestly that 'self-help speak' in your post sounds stupid. Just buck-up and get through school 'cause it's nothing compared to what's outside.

Good luck.

[SHGR, MSN, RN, CNS]

Specific things:

1. counseling services (possibly provided by the school)

2. disability services (should be provided by the school if you have an LD or ED which it seems as though you might)

3. up the chain of command (dean of nursing, etc) after seeking help from 1 and 2, above

4. realistic self-appraisal and learning to take feedback in a more positive light (nursing school requires you to be able to do this in order to be successful), CBT may be helpful (see #1, above)

[elkpark]

OP, I've been involved, as a student or as a faculty member, with several different nursing programs over the years. In my experience, as has already been mentioned by others here, nobody at school cares who is falling in love with whom unless something about that relationship is creating visible, public problems at school for one or both of the individuals. If an instructor is counseling your new love that she should leave you, I would bet a lot of money there is some good reason why. If people at school are hassling you and your new-found love about your relationship, there is probably some good reason why. I hope you can be "humble" enough to seriously consider that possibility, and to consider whether your own behavior and expectations may be bringing some of this negative attention. In my experience, nursing faculty and students are far too busy and involved with their own workloads and challenges to put the time and energy into making another student miserable just for the sake of doing so.

You write that you have been dealing with being consistently attacked and bullied since the age of seven, and entered nursing because you hoped your "personality" might be more welcomed here. Well, if your "personality" is that you perceive everyone as attacking and bullying you, that's not going to be "welcomed" in nursing. Nurses have to have pretty thick skins; a lot of interaction in healthcare can easily be perceived as "attacks" or "bullying" but isn't (it's just brusque, matter-of-fact, grownup, time-is-of-the-essence communication), and a few colleagues and many client and client family members do attempt to attack and bully us. You have to be able to deal with that behavior professionally and keep going. Most nursing students come into nursing school without those kind of skills, but start to learn them in school and continue to develop them after entering practice. Some people just aren't able to live with that, and are miserable in nursing until they finally thrown in the towel at some point and move on. Nursing isn't for everyone, and there's nothing wrong with that. Nurses are (rightly) expected to be compassionate, caring, nurturing and empathetic to our clients, but that doesn't flow both ways. We all signed up to be the caring professionals, not the wounded souls in need of caring and nurturing. People who come into healthcare occupations expecting to get their own emotional needs met are in for a big disappointment. I hope you will either find a way to make nursing work for you (and not expect nursing to remake itself to accommodate you) or find a more salutary path for yourself. Best wishes for your journey!

[canigraduate]

OP, I really want to say something helpful, but all I've got is, "huh?"

It seems like you are fabricating most of your problems in your imagination and are taking real problems and blowing them out of proportion. It sounds mostly like you are having fun being the lead character in your own dramatic novel.

I think it is time for you to come back to reality. How you do this, through counseling, self-reflection, or simple common sense, is up to you.

I think it is time for you to leave your fantasy life behind.

[Silverdragon102, BSN]

I think the OP has had the answers that they need and has indicated that they want the thread closed so I am going ahead and closing it