What's the strangest phone conversation you've ever had at work?

Coloradonurse1983 · Aug 14, 2018

Pt on vent, nonresponsive. Very sick. Not over breathing the vent on no sedation. Old as dirt. Of course, full code. Family in denial.

Family: I don't think she's that sick. You should turn the vent off and let her prove to you she can do it.

Me: I can't turn it off, it's out of my scope to do so. Plus, even if I could I wouldn't. She'd die.

Family: Just for 10 minutes.

Me: Absolutely not. She will die.

Family: No, she'll be fine.

Me: That's basically like holding a pillow over her face unvented. You'd kill her.

Family: That's rude. I want to talk to someone that will do it.

Me: No one will voluntarily cause a code on a vented, full code pt.

Family: I want her transferred then.

Me: ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜

silverbat · Aug 17, 2018

I called a doctor at about 3 am needing a pen pain med that had not been obtained earlier, and the patient was really in pain.

The doctor said give her 50mg IM of atenolol q 4. I said atenolol? He said yes a t e n o l o l. I said do you mean Demerol? He said oh, well I guess I do.

So I start writing the order and before I get more than time and date. He calls back. And said. Wait a minute, what did I just order? I told him the Demerol order. He said ok good. I just had the weirdest dream about atenolol!!!

allnurses Guide · Aug 21, 2018

I once was taking care of the patient of a certain orthopedic doctor

who was known to enjoy getting his drink on when off work.

One evening I was calling this doctor. As far as I remember, it wasn't

an emergency, just something I felt like the doctor should know.

I dialed the number, and this is what I heard when the person answered:

"BLEAAAAAAHHHHH!!" and hung up.

I charted "unable to reach physician". In hindsight I guess I should have

been concerned that something might be wrong. I guess I assumed that,

if I even had the right phone number... the guy was drunk.

This was about 12-13 years ago. This MD just recently passed away.

God rest his soul.

Orca, ADN, ASN, RN · Aug 23, 2018

I once was taking care of the patient of a certain orthopedic doctor
who was known to enjoy getting his drink on when off work.
One evening I was calling this doctor. As far as I remember, it wasn't
an emergency, just something I felt like the doctor should know.
I dialed the number, and this is what I heard when the person answered:
"BLEAAAAAAHHHHH!!" and hung up.
I charted "unable to reach physician". In hindsight I guess I should have
been concerned that something might be wrong. I guess I assumed that,
if I even had the right phone number... the guy was drunk.
This was about 12-13 years ago. This MD just recently passed away.
God rest his soul.

I know that it was ugly of me, but I had to laugh at this one. Brilliant.

viprn21, BSN, RN · Aug 24, 2018

I had a patient have a stroke at a restaurant. EMS brought him in and he wound up in ICU on a vent, then it was determined a few hours later that he was terminal and we started preparations to withdraw. I received at least four phone calls from his friends and family asking me what to do about his car that was at the restaurant. Legit, why would you think to ask the nurse at the hospital what to do about the car? Why not call the restaurant?? Yeesh.

justavolunteer · Aug 25, 2018

This was a phone call I heard as 'justavolunteer' once. To start, one day I showed up to volunteer. Every few minutes, the overhead page was "Dr.X, call 1234", "Dr X, call 7890", lots of different numbers. Finally, a nurse on my unit needed Dr. X. He looked up doc's phone # and called him. He hung up & said "I got Dr X's wife & boy, did she sound pissed". Turned out Dr X had left his cell at home. His wife had to field a million phone calls & explain the situation. Then our unit found out: you want him, have to page him.

Wuzzie · Aug 30, 2018

I've had some strange ones but this tops them all. Got a call on our triage line today (huge cancer hospital we field 2200 calls a month for just ONE type of cancer. Super sick patients, research, the whole shebang) This patient asked "is there something you can prescribe or I can get OTC to decrease the smelliness of my flatulence". Seriously?! You called your oncologist for this? I have no words.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Aug 30, 2018

Posted this in the OR forum, but I'll bite:
circulator/ICU nurse conversation.
Phone rings. ICU nurse: Hi, was wondering if I have enough time to go to lunch before taking this patient.
Me, knowing I've got at least another hour in the OR: Absolutely.
ICU nurse: Great, can I get report?
Me: Well, if you want it, but it'll change a lot.
ICU nurse: Yes, please.
Me: Patient is having CABG x3 and an AVR. Left radial art line, right IJ central line and PA cath. Will have two mediastinal chest tubes and one left pleural chest tube. Currently has not received any blood products. Vitals are meaningless at this point since we're still on pump.
ICU nurse: Well, can I have the vitals anyway?
Me, smirking as I think of the reaction: Currently in asystole, heart rate of zero, pressure is 55 over 50, PA is 3 over 3 and CVP is 0.
ICU nurse: Oh my God! The patient's coding? Shouldn't you be helping with that?
Me: No, when they're on pump having heart surgery we like this. That's why I said the vitals are meaningless. I'll call you with an updated report when it's time.
Sometimes I wish that all nurses taking postop patients had to observe the surgeries so they'd have something of an idea.

You could probably get in to the OR to observe any time you wanted. Just ask the surgeon, say you want to get a better understanding of the operations. I am glad you want to learn. I wish all nurses respected the OR situation and understood what goes on in there besides yelling and breaking expensive instruments., LOL.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Aug 30, 2018

This is nowhere near what has been posted but I got a little laugh out of it. I was working for an ALF and I won't say where but it's name is like a lot of them that might be confused with a hotel/motel service if you didn't know the area and hadn't seen it in person. It's 7am on a Saturday, I answer the phone:
Me:"Thank you for calling (facility name), nurse (my name) speaking how can I help you?" It was the main line to the facility and the secretary wasn't in yet so I got all the calls.
Caller: "Yes, I need to rent an apartment"
Me: "Ok, are you looking for assisted living or memory care"
Caller: "It doesn't matter"
Me: scratching my head at this point, "Well, the rates vary considerably since memory care does considerably more for the resident"
Caller: "I'll take whatever is available. Can I move in tonight?"
Me: "Ma'am, I want to make sure that you know who your calling. We are a senior living facility that has assisted living and memory care services. Are you looking for this type of living arrangement? If so, there will be some documentation that we will need from your doctor before we can set up a move in date."
Caller: "So you cannot rent an apartment to me and my three children right now?"
Me: "I think there is some confusion here. We are not an apartment or hotel/motel. We are a retirement home."
Caller: "So I can't move in today?"
Me: "Let me give you are the number to marketing. They can help discuss your options".....why, why, why, does the licensed nurse get to answer the phone when the secretary is off duty???I don't think it requires a healthcare license to answer a phone!....now back to trying to page that doctor....

Just say "you need to speak to +++++ after 8 a.m. and we will look forward to your call" and go back to your duties.

Editorial Team / Admin · Aug 30, 2018

You could probably get in to the OR to observe any time you wanted. Just ask the surgeon, say you want to get a better understanding of the operations. I am glad you want to learn. I wish all nurses respected the OR situation and understood what goes on in there besides yelling and breaking expensive instruments., LOL.

I actually do work in the OR. And observing isn't that easy for infection control purposes. For employees, it must be proven to be related to the job. For those who are not employees, there is paperwork that must be signed by the director of the department and the chief of surgery as well as providing proof of immunizations and HIPAA agreement.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Aug 30, 2018

I had a recently-discharged patient's mom call me while she was in the drive-thru line at the pharmacy. She was calling to complain that the pharmacist was telling her the med was not covered by insurance, and that we shouldn't prescribe meds that insurance won't pay for. I asked what the med was and it was an OTC rash cream. She was stressed out that she was supposed to put the cream on every 6 hours and it had now been 8 hours, and the med was not covered by insurance even though the doctor wrote a prescription for it so how was she supposed to get some. And now her baby was going to get the rash again and it was the doctor's fault. I told her to park her car and go in and get it, it would be on the shelf. She said she didn't want to take the baby out of the car to go inside. This conversation went on for about 10 minutes and I could hear the pharmacist telling her something on the intercom, and I heard cars starting to honk behind her. When I realized she was no longer really listening to me I just hung up. Oops.

Pts should be told before they go to the pharmacy that this one is OTC and you will have to go inside to get and pay for it yourself. Insurance doesn't cover it. And some people just might not have the money to just go in and buy it - not right with them anyway.

A really smart pharmacy would figure out how to have some employee go get stuff off the shelf and sell it right at the window, right along with the prescriptions, paid for separtely.

Non-Rx items should be written on different pieces of paper and handed to the paraent, along with notification that these items on this paper require you to pay for them yourself. And there should be no confusion, since prescriptions are almost all faxed in to the pharmacy now, it seems, at least where I live and work.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Aug 30, 2018

I actually do work in the OR. And observing isn't that easy for infection control purposes. For employees, it must be proven to be related to the job. For those who are not employees, there is paperwork that must be signed by the director of the department and the chief of surgery as well as providing proof of immunizations and HIPAA agreement.

I actually have worked in the OR. We were always willing to have students and not try to keep the OR like the inner sanctum, magnificent though it was.

.

If I were a surgeon and a nurse who cares for my patients post-op told me she wanted to be able to better understand my surgeries/her patients/our patients so she could give them the best possible care, I'd have her in there the next day. 10 layers of gowns, 14 masks and head coverings, gloves on q single digit, shoe coverings that would make her 8 feet taller, but she'd be there - every document signed, all shots up to date, all requirements met. Believe me, she'd be there. No i undotted, no t uncrossed.Would she see into the wound? Rather little, despite standing by Anesthesia but she'd be there.. Would she understand and observe the myriad circulators and scrub techs, the pump techs, the anesthesiologists? Every one of them. Time on and off pump. Absolutely. My post-op staff want to learn? They're in.