I am in my forties, but a lot of people (such as waitresses, sales clerks, cashiers) call me "honey" and "sweetheart" all the time. I think this is fine, when the person is older than me, but I get annoyed when someone who is young enough to be my daughter calls me "honey." Males never call me by these names (with the exception of my husband!)
Occasionally, a subordinate at work will call me "honey. " I tell them immediately not to refer to me that way. But when a waitress does it, I let it go. I'd like to ask them not to, however.
I have only rarely referred to anyone as "sweetheart," and when I have, it's been a child, or a pt in a very vulnerable, hurt state, who is seeking reassurance and protection.
Geez. That's a little harsh. How does she feel about "yall" Yall is as much a part of my language as the word "the" so if I was her waitress and I walked up and said "Do yall need anything" and she didn't leave me a tip for that reason......well that's just wrong....yall.
you state,"that you don't like to be called "honey", but you have referred to patients using that same "name". If you don't like it, look above the bed, get the patients name and use it. Sick or not. Practice, what you demand in others.
As a pt. I had a nurse who called me & many other pts. sweetie or sweetheart. She was like 30-ish so I was at least 10 years older, most of the pts. were senior citizens. It didnt bother me at all, it was so obvious it was an expression of empathy. I got fabulous care & that's what mattered. However I would NEVER call a nurse by a personal term, I was the one receiving care so in that context her calling us sweetie was appropriate, a pt. (unless elderly) calling a nurse by an endearing term is disrespectful. Maybe that reflects the nurse's relative authoritative position but honestly I didnt analyze it that much.
I can foresee a couple of situations where using honey or darling or sweetheart may lead to misunderstandings - those unfamiliar with the informality of American culture may find it improper (& it can go either way). I remember being quite surprised when I came to America that students call professors & employees call bosses by first name. And of course some clueless guy may think the nurse is coming on to him...but that's another discussion
Boy, I haven't read all 67 posts on this thread! But I just wanted to say I worked with an EXCELLENT nurse when just starting out, and she often called people (nurses, patients, ancillary staff) "My dear." I much preferred that to any of the other terms meant to reassure an anxious patient (or show respect to other staff). I often used it myself.
Just FWIW. More choices than just honey, darling, etc.
i guess it depends upon who calls it me, but alot of collegues i work with tend to use these words. i only tend to use it in work again if its to a patient feeling upset or needs some friendly words.
I don't care who it is or how old they are....I hate it! I think it's condescending. When the floor nurses call me "honey" (because I'm a nursing student) what it means is "I don't care enough to remember your name"- I'd rather be called "Hey you"
Yep . . . . 
Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN
11,305 Posts
I think that is a little harsh too.
steph