Weird Interview!?

Nurses General Nursing

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I have been working Per-diem the last few years here and there. I have also worked per-diem in the past even when I was working full time. I have been to many different interviews in my lifetime (non nursing and nursing). A few weeks ago I was considering a new gig and went to an interview. Here is where it gets weird. I walked in, Manager told me to come into the office and sit down (she motions to a chair that was mostly in front of her desk). I sit down, she pulls her chair from around her desk so now the chairs are directly face to face. I am sitting in my chair with my legs crossed one over the other (ie like a lady). She proceeds to sit down in her chair and puts her legs in a crossed legged position (both up in the chair crossed over). I was kinda dumbfounded. I was thinking what is she doing. Is she just stupid, is she trying to throw me off guard to see how I would react, is she just a free spirit, does she just not care, is this normal now, am I just old, am I overthinking the situation? She sat like that during the entire interview which otherwise seemed like a normal interview. I am around 60 and she was probably early 30's. So my questions is, have any of you seen or heard of this and what is your reaction. I honestly still don't know what to think about this.

Specializes in Psychiatric and Mental Health NP (PMHNP).

Have loved reading the responses on this thread.

OK, for my serious answer. Prior to becoming an NP, I was a business executive. I worked in a very formal, conservate, prestigious firm at one point and one of the female (very) senior executives loved to sit cross legged - she was a bit of a free spirit Some people are just like that and I wouldn't read too much into it.

As for her coming out from behind her desk and sitting directly facing you w/o anything in between, there is a good reason for that. In the business world, a desk creates a barrier and is kind of a power thing. The person behind the desk has more power. The interviewer likely just wanted to create a more open and less intimidating situation for the interview.

Note, if an executive is sitting behind their desk, someone who sits on the desk or moves behind the desk to physically confront the executive is attempting physical and psychological dominance.

6 Votes
Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.
8 hours ago, Davey Do said:

If there were some condition that would cause her to behave abnormally, in a polite society, it needs to be said.

Proclaiming a deviation from typical behavior would put the other person, in this case Daisy, at ease and open the interaction to a more appropriately humanistic course.

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I disagree.

If it is a medical condition or disability then no, absolutely she doesn't have to say anything. I don't say anything to people. If someone I knew asked, maybe, but to a stranger/interviewee, no way!

1 Votes
Specializes in LTC.

My interpretation is that she prefers informal, "Let's get to know each other" type of interviews and is attempting to present herself in a friendly manner.

That being said, I would be taken aback in that situation. That's not protocol! ?

2 Votes
Specializes in Occupational Health; Adult ICU.

She's just read about (researched) "mirroring," that's all. She meant to put you (I think) at ease, and "on par." Neat, I think. Remember, you're a Boomer (as am I), she's a Millenial.

Search for mirroring, actually it's a good practice to do when being interviewed. There really is a lot of differences between Boomers, GenXer's and Millennials.

3 Votes

I think you're reading too much into it, Daisy.

It is quite possible she was comfortable.

Years ago, when I was in graduate school, I had a job interview with the Dean from the University of Iowa.

He was in his 60s, and my husband's boss.

Throughout our interview, he had his feet propped up on his desk, hands clasped behind his head.

I thought his posture strange, but figured he just felt comfortable with me, since he knew my husband well.

By the way, I wasn't offered the job!

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
4 hours ago, Lil Nel said:

I think you're reading too much into it, Daisy.

It is quite possible she was comfortable.

Years ago, when I was in graduate school, I had a job interview with the Dean from the University of Iowa.

He was in his 60s, and my husband's boss.

Throughout our interview, he had his feet propped up on his desk, hands clasped behind his head.

I thought his posture strange, but figured he just felt comfortable with me, since he knew my husband well.

By the way, I wasn't offered the job!

Feet propped up on the desk, hands behind his head in an interview screams lack of respect to me. So does the cross-legged style with feet up on the chair. It's rude and disrespectful.

2 Votes
Specializes in ED, ICU, PSYCH, PP, CEN.

She was maybe trying to see how you would react because of the age difference. She was trying to figure out if you would be comfortable, or if you would think it inappropriate.

I'm old, and I wouldn't care what they did as long as I got the job. Also if you were applying to an ER you need to be able to deal with "strange/different" cause it's a crazy playground.

I once interviewed for a job where the director simply bragged about herself and her beautiful life for two hours and hired me on the spot.

2 months later I was transfired to a different unit, because she liked me, but I didn't fit in. I get it, I'm just not comfortable sitting around an empty ER at 0200 watching Media with people I've known for only 1 month.

I gotta know you for at least 6 months before we laugh over Media together.

LOL

1 Votes
23 hours ago, Ruby Vee said:

Feet propped up on the desk, hands behind his head in an interview screams lack of respect to me. So does the cross-legged style with feet up on the chair. It's rude and disrespectful.

How about a NM who doesn't introduce herself, and makes interview notes, on teeny tiny yellow Post-Its?

That happened to me almost two years ago, and I should have RUN, but didn't.

The Dean who didn't hire me, actually did me a huge favor, as the job only would have served as yet another environment for my husband and I to quarrel in.

He is my ex-husband for a reason.

An interviewer sitting cross-legged is mild, in my experience.

I have been asked illegal questions during interviews, such as: Do you and your husband each have a car? If you have children, how will that affect transportation?

That type of stuff is illegal and disrespectful.

How about being told you are wearing "too much scent," during an interview, when you are only wearing the scent of hair spray?

Maybe it is hard to judge anyone's intentions, body language wise, unless you see it for yourself.

On 3/15/2019 at 5:12 PM, Ruby Vee said:

Feet propped up on the desk, hands behind his head in an interview screams lack of respect to me. So does the cross-legged style with feet up on the chair. It's rude and disrespectful.

I second that, very disrespectful.

Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr.
On ‎3‎/‎14‎/‎2019 at 4:58 AM, RNNPICU said:

I too did a semi-intense search for body language such as the one described and couldn't find anything that could justify it. The only other explanation is that the interviewer just doesn't know how to conduct a professional interview.

I agree with you. I think this is unprofessional. People with personal issues can state they have a reason for doing something prior to the start of an interview and move forward professionally.

OP:

I think this behavior is a good indicator that this person is not professional in more ways than one. I understand how her behavior may be mistaken for fun by some, but it also screams of a possible mental health imbalance too. A professional understands and knows that an interview is not only an opportunity for the person seeking a job to make a first good impression, it is also an opportunity to properly represent the employer to a prospective employee. Thus, if you do not receive an offer, be thankful!

I personally wouldn't have done that, but maybe it was her way of showing you that he is not a stuffy person, that she is a relaxed person and it could be a great unit to work on. She is probably the type of manager that sets her expectations but is able to relax and work along side of you.

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