Use some class/compassion

Nurses Relations

Published

I think this forum is the best thing I have found. I have found alot of good information and suggestions. I just wanted to ask all who post or reply to a question to please use some compassion. There is no need to be rude or negative when someone is asking a question or giving advise. Everyone is entitled to their opionion and they deserve respect. I've seen too many reply's to a thread where people are just down right rude. Just my :twocents:

Thank you:D

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
Much like the passive aggressive drivers. They are so bold cause they think they will never see you again. But, once in awhile, it ends up with you both going to to the same place and they are like.............going out of their way to avoid you all of a sudden..........the middle finger is well hidden face to face.

So true! So awkward when that happens:uhoh21:

I have no problem using my real name, but I think it might make it easier to identify exactly the places and things I post about sometimes. Don't want that. :no:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I have no problem in keeping it real, so to speak. I do have a problem when people nitpick about things such as spelling when they don't use correct spelling themselves. If you're going to go on a tangent about someone's spelling use a spellchecker for crying out loud.

I just think that if you have something to say about something you may not agree with you can say it in a constructive way as not to make yourself look like a complete jerk. Who cares if you have a smarta$$ comeback? To me, I respect people's opinions that can clarify themselves in a manner that doesn't resort to flaming or putting down other people. That's not difficult to do.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.
I have no problem in keeping it real, so to speak. I do have a problem when people nitpick about things such as spelling when they don't use correct spelling themselves. If you're going to go on a tangent about someone's spelling use a spellchecker for crying out loud.

I just think that if you have something to say about something you may not agree with you can say it in a constructive way as not to make yourself look like a complete jerk. Who cares if you have a smarta$$ comeback? To me, I respect people's opinions that can clarify themselves in a manner that doesn't resort to flaming or putting down other people. That's not difficult to do.

I agree with your statement. This is an informal forum...heck, we really don't know who we are communicating with, to be honest... Anyhow, because this is informal, I excuse much more than I would in my professional life. We are sharing, venting, expressing views and such. The last thing we need is to make this into a grammar contest or a spelling bee. If I can get the jist of what a person is saying, that is enough for me.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Peds Critical Care, Dialysis, General.

FWIW - I like Simon better than Paula, too. He makes sense.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.
yeah, go hang out on the political threads . . .. . :rolleyes:

i agree - class and compassion go a long way. :up:

steph

i think something that comes into play sometimes is our differing ages and levels of and length of experience.

an example of what i mean by that is the other day, one young friend who having a very difficult pregnancy, asked me a question that i was unable to answer because it has simply been too long since i have been a nursing student. a second person (an ob nurse) overheard us, answered the question while managing to leave the impression that i was an idiot because i couldn't answer. sorry, but i spent 3 months in ortho and the rest of my nursing career in psych.

i think if we aren't careful, it is too easy to make assumptions. not all new nurses are good, confident and whatever else they want to be right out of school while not all experienced nurses are good, helpful, confident etc. either. we all do our best at that time.

we all need to think before we type...

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
i think something that comes into play sometimes is our differing ages and levels of and length of experience.

an example of what i mean by that is the other day, one young friend who having a very difficult pregnancy, asked me a question that i was unable to answer because it has simply been too long since i have been a nursing student. a second person (an ob nurse) overheard us, answered the question while managing to leave the impression that i was an idiot because i couldn't answer. sorry, but i spent 3 months in ortho and the rest of my nursing career in psych.

i think if we aren't careful, it is too easy to make assumptions. not all new nurses are good, confident and whatever else they want to be right out of school while not all experienced nurses are good, helpful, confident etc. either. we all do our best at that time.

we all need to think before we type...

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

we need to think before we judge what people have typed too. it is hard on the internet to be completely sure about intentions. months ago i was criticized for using this smilie :D because some saw it as a condescending smilie whereas i have always seen this smilie :D as simply a more expressive :) . . . just a bigger smile. meaning happy.

in real life, even if someone is being an idiot (which you were not) . . .we can be kind to each other.

last night after my class, which gets out at 10 p.m., i picked up my son from his friend's house and we went over to a grocery store to get a snack for the ride home (an hour and a half). there was only one checker and a long long line and when our turn came my check was refused and the cashier was apologetic. i stepped aside to let the line continue to be served and asked to see the manager to clear it up (i'd just used my cash for gas and left my atm card by the computer after paying bills online so all i had was my checkbook). the manager came up and went over to that same cashier to try to run my check through again after i asked her not to because i did not want to hold up the line any longer as people were tired and had been waiting in line for awhile. still no luck. no big deal - we'd just go home and i didn't get mad. i knew i had money in my account and it was some kind of snafu. embarrassing to hold the line up - but no one gave me any grief and a lady actually followed me out to offer to pay for our snacks. i thanked her and said no.

now, i could have thrown a hissy fit and the folks in line could have complained about the wait and the lady could have just stood there without trying to be kind.

but i left with a good feeling - and i'll head over to the bank in a bit to clear it up. without yelling at anyone.

i see folks routinely treat other people with rudeness - making assumptions. it is refreshing to see people try to understand and be kind instead.

:D steph

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

good story steph. i went to our vet's office once to pick up more thyroid for our elderly cat and the fill in receptionist refused our check in a loud voice, shrieking that "your checks always bounce!" the vet's wife happened to be within earshot. we were given quincy's med free of charge. not only was i embarassed, i was absolutely speechless which isn't easy to accomplish. i didn't lose my cool or even try to defend myself. i simply gathered up what pride i could scrape up and left. i never did find out what triggered the outburst but we have an unusual last name so she hadn't confused me with someone else. we have certainly been treated well by that clinic and are friends socially with the vet and his wife so we have continued to go there but it was hard to not lose it that day. last time i bounced a check i lived in a dorm.

it is hard when you can't see someone's expression or hear tone of voice so we must not automatically assume malice when none was intended.

kathy

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Kathy - I should add that I've also seen the public being treated rudely but those behind the counter too. Yikes.

I shop at the same store locally - and the same thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago. I went over to my bank and they said I was not the first one to come in that day with a story about the store not taking a check. It was a glitch in the store's system.

I'm heading over to the vet in about 40 minutes with our pups . ... . . maybe I'd better take cash. :coollook:

steph

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

steph,

:offtopic:

good luck with your babies and their checkup. skritch them for me. what kind are they?

kathy

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I couldn't agree more with what you both said. It takes a person with a great deal of self-control to not get defensive and go on a rampage when they've been put on the spot.

My son works in customer service at Wally World and he's one of the sweetest kids you could ever meet. He works nights sitting with an elderly man as well. Anyway, he had a lady come in to return some items and she didn't have her receipt or her ID and my son told her he couldn't give her the money back. She proceeded to go on a rampage and called him and everyone in the store every name under the sun. My son, who is 6'1 and weighs 230 lbs, looked at her and told her, "I'm sorry, I only follow the rules. I wish I could give you your money back. I hope your day gets better and I hope that you realize I'm just doing my job. God bless you."

He said she just looked at him kind of funny and then just turned around and left. Whenever we get defensive and get upset we only feed the flames. The older I get, the less confrontations the better. We can always say what we need to without making ourselves look like an idiot. It's difficult to tell a person's emotions when you're reading text. Many people jump to the conclusion and assume the worst. Sometimes we just need to take it for what it is and move on.

I really do think the older a person gets the wiser they are at handling certain situations. Nothing compares to life experience IMHO.:specs:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

[QUOTE=Spidey's mom;3692924]We need to think before we judge what people have typed too. It is hard on the internet to be completely sure about intentions. Months ago I was criticized for using this smilie :D because some saw it as a condescending smilie whereas I have always seen this smilie :D as simply a more expressive :) . . . just a bigger smile. Meaning happy.

It's interesting, even the smilies can get mis-interpreted! I've thought this :D was a smart-a** grin, or a Cheshire cat grin. So, out of 25,000 posts, you may have accidentally p.o.-ed, um, how many people?? :uhoh21: I'm just kidding ya :lol2:

Thankfully, most people are courteous. Just a simple thing like holding the door for you as you walk behind someone at the store. Most people, young and old, will do this. It's a good thing, too, because it still ruins my day when someone goes off on me for no apparent reason.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
steph,

:offtopic:

good luck with your babies and their checkup. skritch them for me. what kind are they?

kathy

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

mini-doxies . . . .brother and sister. they don't like getting their temp taken . . .:rolleyes:

steph

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment