Update on the Caps/Dresses at pinning topic

[rach_nc_03]

OK, after the debacle of the last thread on this topic, I want to ask, specifically, PLEASE direct any flames or nasty comments to my private messages, NOT to this thread.

I asked a few months back how my classmates and I could address disagreements we had with the faculty on our pinning ceremony attire. I got good suggestions (and a lot of criticism) from this board- thank you to those who had insightful comments to make. I used some of your suggestions, and here's how things turned out....

In the midst of some additional drama between the students, the faculty, and the program director, the director came to ME one night at clinical and asked for my perspective on things. We talked for a good hour and a half, and he was incredibly respectful, and really listened to what I had to say.

He said that he knew the students had some issues with the pinning ceremony. He asked me what those specific issues were, so I told him the main things were the caps and dresses. Interestingly, he told me that *he* wasn't a big fan of that outfit, but the faculty voted on such matters, and he always got outvoted. He then gave me a laundry list of things he thought needed to be taken out- the Nightengale Pledge (for being outdated), long bios (these were taking almost an hour to plow through), lighting the little lamps, a guest speaker....and he wanted me to get input from the students on these issues. He totally agreed that the students needed to have more input into the content of the ceremony, so he asked me to hold a class meeting and have the class vote on each of these elements. I agreed, but asked him NOT to attend, as I felt people wouldn't be open when he was around. He made it clear to me that some elements might not change, but we could certainly make our preferences known.

So I sent out an email and called a meeting. I made it clear that the director had asked me to do this, and that some of these things might not go our way, but we were being asked for our input (which is more than anything that's happened in the past). Against my suggestion, the director stayed in the room during the meeting. Most of the students never looked up during the discussion, and didn't vote one way or the other on any issue except the caps and dresses. Some people looked exasperated when we talked about certain elements, like the pledge, but refused to vote for including them.

One thing I should point out- when I talked to the director that night at clinical, I made it clear to him that I wouldn't be attending the ceremony if we were required to wear caps and/or dresses. I didn't do that to threaten him; he asked what my personal feelings were, and what I planned to do if the dress code didn't change. He said he respected my decision and opinion, and admired the fact that I was willing to go against the norm because I felt strongly about something.

After the class meeting, the faculty discussed our recommendations, and the dress requirement was lifted- women could wear white pants and smock, or white dresses. The caps, however, remained mandatory. The director asked me to compile a list of who planned to attend the ceremony (since it was now optional). That afternoon, I sent a list around, and four of us decided not to attend. One of my classmates called a meeting and said he was angry that I wasn't attending (ironically, this guy can't stand me, and has made no secret of that fact). He said that my friend (the VP) and I had 'stirred things up' with our 'crusade' to change the ceremony, and we didn't have the decency to show up for it. He felt WE should be required to go- regardless of the fact that it was now optional.

well, I pointed out, calmly, that the other students came to US with these grievances, not the other way around- and that everyone had been really gung-ho about wanting change until they had to own up to their opinions in front of the director. The women who had initially petitioned for change piped up and verified that they'd come to us, and that they'd kept their mouths shut during the meeting because of fear of retribution. Turns out that the majority of the students wanted to do the pledge and lamp thing, but didn't feel comfortable saying so, since the director obviously thought they were dispensable. They also felt I shouldn't vote anymore if I planned to skip the ceremony (I was okay with that). So they voted to include the plege and lamp, and two of the men started ranting about wanting a 'traditional' ceremony, and how they felt our petition threatened that. I pointed out that (a) the caps and dresses didn't affect them personally, and (b) the fact that they were actually MEN embarking on nursing careers went against long-standing traditions, too. They thought about it, and agreed. When the guy who lambasted me found out why I was skipping the ceremony, he said he understood- but he *did* hang around to see me tell our director...I think he was anticipating a big, messy scene.

When I turned in the list, I said, 'you'll notice that four people aren't attending, including me. Since the president usually welcomes everyone, the class voted for so-and-so to do this.' He asked why I chose not to attend, and I told him that I felt caps were degrading, hearkened back to a time when nurses were treated with less respect, and were reminiscent of maids' caps. I said that, instead of signifying our transition into the professional world, I felt it detracted from the professional image of the registered nurse. He smiled and said, 'well, rachel, I completely respect your opinion and decision.'

So, one outdated policy was changed, at least, and I'm happy about that, as are many of my classmates.

And, one last time, if you want to attack me for what I've said, please send me a private message. I posted this update not to start a debate, but to let everyone know how things turned out.

[SmilingBluEyes]

No attacks from me, but praise. You really stood up for what you felt was right. you are going to make an EXCELLENT NURSE. And do try to remember, most of those who responded on the other thread said this same thing. Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negatives! I am impressed!

[prmenrs, RN]

I think you handled this challenge in a very professional manner. Others may or may not agree, but you did well, IMO.

[hypnotic_nurse]

Bravo! You'd make a great manager, BTW.

[NRSKarenRN, BSN, RN]

What a great learning experience that you will carry with you forever. Be glad to work with you anyday if you ever get to Philadelphia area.

[elizabells, BSN, RN]

What a great learning experience that you will carry with you forever. Be glad to work with you anyday if you ever get to Philadelphia area.

Rachel -

I came to these boards after the original thread, but I just spent two hours reading it. I would like to say that you? Awesome. I know I'm about to sound like a kiss@$$, but I want to be like you and fergus and smilingblueyes when I grow up.

That's all.

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

You are awesome - please handle things the same way when you get your job.

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

I said the very same thing the first responder said..."you will make a great nurse". Standing up for yourself and your values in a professional mannor is very much a part of the job! Good for you!

[CCU NRS]

Correct me if I am wrong but I seem to remember you originally had issue with the attire, but when several people said tradition was good it became an issue about the ceremony being held in a church. I see no mention of a church here or that even being debated.

What became of that issue? If I may ask?

[rach_nc_03]

Correct me if I am wrong but I seem to remember you originally had issue with the attire, but when several people said tradition was good it became an issue about the ceremony being held in a church. I see no mention of a church here or that even being debated.

What became of that issue? If I may ask?

CCU NRS, that's not quite true- I'm not sure what you mean by 'several people said tradition was good', because the majority of the women in the class took issue with the attire, so it was always THE primary concern. It was *my* personal feeling that a ceremony with *overtly* religious overtones, held in a church, was inappropriate, and many posters here agreed- perhaps that's what you remember. It was NEVER about the building. A few of my classmates felt the same way about that particular topic, but none of those students were willing to voice their opinions because of the clear bias of the faculty.

I did talk to our director about this issue, though. He understood where i was coming from, but (a) felt that the tradition of having clergy members give an invocation and benediction was far too entrenched to change, and (b) said there was no way to secure an alternate space so late in the year.

Had this been of primary concern for the majority of my classmates, I would have pursued it; but, in the end, it wasn't. I wasn't out to change the ceremony solely for my benefit- I was representing my fellow students in their wishes. (On top of that, I've had my own life to manage- I just moved, i'm going through a messy divorce, and I just had extensive surgery last week.) This became a real-life exercise in prioritization, essentially.

To everyone else, thank you for your kind words and support! I'm going through a rough patch in my life right now, and your comments have really helped.

[Dixielee, BSN, RN]

I did not read the first thread, but I am proud of you for standing up and making positive change. That attitude will serve you well throught your career. There have been times when I ahve stood up for something, and ended up leaving a job over it. BUT, the times that has happened, it turned out that my stance was the final straw and changes were finally made. Nursing is a relatively small community, so you will always be able to sit back and see what you have done, even in retrospect. You may not make the changes for yourself, but for those who follow, and that is a victory.

Just one curiosity though....did the men have to wear caps? If not, why not? That seems to be quite the double standard. I am glad the caps are gone. Yes, tradition is one thing, but tradition and the times change. Slavery was "tradition" at one time, but no one wants to see that returned, so change can be a wonderful thing!

[SmilingBluEyes]

Rachel -

I came to these boards after the original thread, but I just spent two hours reading it. I would like to say that you? Awesome. I know I'm about to sound like a kiss@$$, but I want to be like you and fergus and smilingblueyes when I grow up.

That's all.

we could do worse than emulate people like the OP and fergus (she is so smart). But I don't think I fit in their category. Ty for the compliment!