Tormenting myself over the "what ifs" of life as a nursing student

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Here's the background: I have worked very hard to get a 4.0 gpa for acceptance into a very competitive nursing program. I also studied very hard on TEAS preparation, also to increase my chance of acceptance into this nursing program. With my scores, I believe I will be accepted for this coming fall 2017.

Here's the problem: I have been tormenting myself over the "what ifs" of life as a nursing student while having two little children. Example: For the past two weeks we have had the upper respiratory plague circulating through our house (2 kids with 104 temps at separate times) and I am beginning to panic about how I would be managing this with school attendance/clinicals/etc.

My primary concern is missing classes and clinicals because of sick kids. I don't have anyone to watch my kids when they are that sick and honestly don't know what I will do as a student when faced with this. While doing my pre reqs I never missed one class or lab. But that was 1-2 days a week.

I will be investing a lot of time and money in this program and want to know if it's a bad idea to try entering a nursing program in my situation? I am a hard worker and not afraid of that. Just looking for some advice from those who have been there!

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I didn't have kids when I went to school, but I did "fail" a clinical due to my own illness and absences. It was a drag to get set back a semester, but life happens.

Most nursing programs have some sort of grace for these types of situations, but it is typically limited. If your life is in constant turmoil and you have "emergencies" on a regular basis, reconsider your timing. The individuals in my program with unstable home lives didn't make it through the program ...but for those of us who have a rare, incompatible event, it's workable.

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My mother started nursing school when I was 5 and my brother was 8. She also waited tables during school. It was a real struggle for her and she considered quiting several times. I can't tell you if it is feasible for you, but I can tell you that her going to nursing school allowed us to have a comfortable life and a quality education. I just graduated from nursing school and had my son during my second year. My wife was at home full time and I still found it challenging. Just remember nursing school is an endurance test. Some days you want hit that 4.0 goal, but those who don't quit typically graduate. It's like the old saying "what do you call the guy who graduated last in his class in medical school" "a doctor". Good luck!

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Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

Moved to the Student forums.

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Bottom line- you absolutely need to find back up child care for when your kids are sick. Most schools are not going to accept you being out every time. I have three kids and if I missed class or clinical every time one of them was sick I would've been kicked out a long time ago.

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I just finished my BSN last year, got pregnant half way through the program, studied through her being a baby, getting pregnant a second time during final year (he's 8 months now), and I think having the kids made me more determined to finish. You definitely need backups to help with the kids though, so I would try to sort out someone reliable before starting school. Now that it's all said and done, having a decent, reliable income has made a world of difference for our family.

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Specializes in ED, psych.

You have time; find that backup child care now. Consider it part of your course materials to purchase, sadly enough. Stethoscope, check. Textbooks, check. Backup childcare, check.

I have two kids, and my program was not accepting of students missing clinicals ... for any reason. One poor girl ended up in the ED for appendicitis on her clinical day and had to petition the program to let her make up the day missed. Some programs are more lenient so you may want to check with yours. However, most aren't accepting of multiple days missed.

Believe me, when the kids brought everything but the plague home, it was stressful! It became quite the balancing act; sometimes it happened on a day I didn't have to be at clinical, sometimes my husband could stay home, other times I had my MIL to help out.

So, you have time. I'd start to figure things out now.

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Specializes in ICU + 25 years as Nursing Faculty.

1. You REALLY need to find "sick child" back-up care.

2. If all the parents with small kids disappeared from my school... our classrooms would be REALLY empty. Having kids is the norm for students at my school. Not all have kids, but the majority do.

3. Balancing the workload of mom/nursing student is challenging... but we have students do it successfully all the time.

4. Many of our parent/students have family (spouse, grandparent, etc) who help tremendously!

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I began nursing @ 18 yo, did a 3 yr RN diploma popular back then in 1968, got a BSN + then a MS in Information Systems. In all fields, attendance is mandatory. Your education is your job: You cannot "call out" at work frequently when your kids are sick, so the same goes for clinical. My suggestion would be to go part time + please, find a backup person to care for your children. Either that, or wait until they are older. By the way, I've held multiple jobs in nursing + no one asked my grades !! Only where I attended the schools...jw

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Don't torture yourself! As others have mentioned you need to find reliable back-up child care options.

I'm a Mum of 2 (9&6) and have 3 weeks of classes left before my final consolidation. I've been very lucky in that neither of my kids have had a single sick day in 2 years. I also have my retired parents caring for my kids (before & after school when needed) and if they were to get sick my parents would care for them. I also send the kids off to my father-in-laws place every 4th or 5th weekend so I can have extra study time on occasion. My husband works a crazy schedule out of town & I can't rely on him for child care & he works 2 out of every 3 weekends. Sometimes I don't see him for 5 days straight.

It will make your life easier if you can get your support system into place now. Good luck in school!

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It isn't just the program that is affected by missed days. YES, you can miss lecture days and probably receive a passing score in theory if you are a person who can read and understand the readings. The issue has to do with clinical hours. The state Board of Nursing requires so many clinical hours. Students must meet this requirement. Nursing faculty develop schedules to accomplish this. They are limited in the number of students they are supervising at clinical experiences. It is not just a matter of 'making' up a day, but involves the faculty to 'make it up' as well. Just imagine, if they had a clinical group of 10 students and those 10 students called in 2 times each. It would lead to the need to have 20 make up shifts. It not only impacts the student, the faculty, and potentially the clinical sites as well. Clinical sites are often limited and an allocation method is utilized. The faculty may only have certain available times to be on site, due to multiple schools utilizing the site. As was suggested by others in response to the question, please start looking for back up plans now. I strongly encourage you to have at least three. Just as you will need back up babysitting when you reach your goal of becoming a nurse, you need it now. Good luck, as you begin and progress into becoming a nurse. You will be amazed at what you can accomplish.

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Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

Agree with the need for back-up plans. But this may also be the time to engage your hubby as a full-time parent rather than assuming that you are 100% responsible for everything child-related. Why isn't he assuming responsibility for sick child care when you are unable to do so?

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