since i was young, i always wanted to be a nurse, because that's what my big sister (who i idolized) wanted to be. she never made it past her cna for personal reasons, and now i'm in college, about to take my cna this term. i'm very excited... i have always wanted to help people, and due to my personal history as a child.. i recognize that what ever career i go into, it must meet certain requirments. there must be stability, security, and must be a demand for it. i can't be one of those people who got a degree, but are working at mc.donnalds cause they can't find a job. so nursing sounds great... so for about 5 years now, that's been my choice, and i'm taking all the steps to make it happen.
but i have a problem.. my family, mainly my boyfriend of four years (who knows me better than anyone) and his mother have voiced some of their concerns about nursing with me. both know that i was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and i have issues with being shy. also they both know i am a very sensitive person and they make it sound like i just wont be able to handle the death, and the heartbreaking stories i will hear as a nurse. they think my love for children will make it even harder for me. they say im gonna have to completly change if i want to do this career, which i understand- but i don't think i have to change in a bad way right? im so sensitive that books make me cry, movies make me genuinly scared, and sad movies make me cry...i guess it's hard for me to remind myself it's not real.
i keep telling myself, that i have met many nurses who are kind and gentle. that i don't have to turn cold and callus to become a nurse. but...if you read this far- i thank you and could you please let me know from your own experience what you think about my situation? are my family right to disuade me from nursing? even if i think it's the best choice? what kind of problems do you forsee me encounering that i might not have already thought of? and can you issue any advice to me at all on this predicament. thank you so much for your replies in advance. i hope it can cheer me up, or make me see the light.
I agree with a lot of the previous posts; this is YOUR life and it's up to YOU to decide what you want to achieve. A good nurse, in my opinion, possesses compassion, which I define as the preception/knowledge the we are all connected to one another, that we need to be sensitive to the needs of those around us b/c those needs are the same as our needs.
I'm 52 and have raised a family on my own and was just recently able to enroll in nursing school. It hasn't been a life long goal like yours, however, I can't image a more fulfilling career path. We all make choices and each choice brings us closer finding our purpose and happiness in life. Listen to the voice inside of you, don't allow outside influences redirect you based on THEIR judgement of who you are. Who you are is what YOU believe.
Check out a plan with your doctor so it's already in place before the disorder flares. Half the battle is recognizing what needs to be handled. And remember that you're not going to be thrown into situations without the skill and knowledge to handle it, you're going to be taught a process that you can rely upon. For all you know, this might be the path that helps relieve some of the s/s of the disorder b/c it will teach you to be confident in your true Self. Education is never wasted even if you discover you nursing is not for you. The process will lead you closer to what you are meant to do. Have faith and take that leap with confidence that no matter what happens you'll be able to handle the situation.
after graduating high school i told my parents i wanted to be a nurse and my mom told me i wouldn't like it because she went to nursing school and hated it. they told me they would not pay for me to go to nursing school so i went into accounting. i've been an accountant for 20 years now and have always hated it but pays the bills. sometime around age 26 i enrolled in nursing school and my in-laws talked me out of it -- saying it was to hard for me, long hours, etc, etc... now i'm 40 and am in a situation where i am able to quit my job and do what i have always wanted to do --- i'm applying to rn school. i take the net tomorrow and if i score well enough i'll start next fall.
do what you want not what others think you should do --- i reject not following my gut............ good luck!
I read your post and had to reply, but feel free to take it with a grain of salt. I am 24 years old, and recently graduated nursing school. When I graduated high school, I too had chosen to go into nursing. My high school sweetheart of 4 years thought it was a bad idea. I was "too shy, too sensitive, and not smart enough." EEW! His mother: "Sweetie, there is more to life than wanting to help others. That is not enough for a career."
Long story short, my boyfriend and I broke up while I was taking CNA classes. It was tough, but I wanted to at least try to be a nurse. A few various boyfriends later, many trying experiences, and a lot of hard work, and I am now a nurse. I too am shy. And passive. And nice. And have a faint stomach. But you work with what you have. And it is really hard to deal with doctors yelling at you and difficult patients. And things will happen that are hard to deal with. You are never alone. There is so much support for the type of work we do. But there are so many moments when you are truly blessed to help somebody heal or share in their life. Everyday I find myself questioning why I chose to be a nurse. And everyday there is a reminder, however small. When I first started, I was terrified to put someone on a bedpan as I might hurt them (really, my knees would shake). Now I look at that and laugh.
Learning new skills can be challenging. Nursing school teaches you how to be assertive when you need to be. This is not the same as being cold and mean. It is standing up for yourself when you need to. Becoming a nurse is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have grown so much and have faith in my abilities. Not everybody likes that, and I have lost a few "friends." However, I have gained a second family with my nursing friends and coworkers. It is very nice to know that others accept and understand me. I have never been happier or more successful in my life. I am not perfect. I do not always know what to do. But in nursing, there is always someone rooting for you to be your best.
I suggest you consider why you want to be a nurse. If the only reason is because your sister wanted to, that is probably not enough. But if you feel inside that you can do it, go for it. You have been wanting to do this for so long. There is a place in nursing for every type of personality. You have something to offer that nobody else can. You just might be surprised at what you can accomplish when you put your mind to it.
i to am a verrryyyy shy and passive person, and trust me, i can cry at the drop of a hat, but nursing is something i love, and no one could ever persuade me to do anything else.
i recently graduated from LPN school july 27th, and even though i havent started working yet (take my boards tomorrow!!! ), it wont matter if you are shy, passive, or a cry baby, when you're taking care of someone, all they want to know is that you are capable and compassionate, and you seem like you are-so follow your own mind, and hopefully your family and friends will support you!
If you really want to become a nurse, you should go for it. Listen to your heart ... not to what others are telling you. An important part of nursing is self-discovery, learning about yourself and your feelings, and how to effectively handle situations you will encounter as a nurse. If you keep that in mind throughout school and practice ways to deal with potential nursing issues, you will be a stronger nurse in the end. Being sensitive is not a bad thing, especially for a nurse. I'd rather have a sensitive nurse than a cold, callous one anyday!
since i was young, i always wanted to be a nurse, because that's what my big sister (who i idolized) wanted to be. she never made it past her cna for personal reasons, and now i'm in college, about to take my cna this term. i'm very excited... i have always wanted to help people, and due to my personal history as a child.. i recognize that what ever career i go into, it must meet certain requirments. there must be stability, security, and must be a demand for it. i can't be one of those people who got a degree, but are working at mc.donnalds cause they can't find a job. so nursing sounds great... so for about 5 years now, that's been my choice, and i'm taking all the steps to make it happen.
but i have a problem.. my family, mainly my boyfriend of four years (who knows me better than anyone) and his mother have voiced some of their concerns about nursing with me. both know that i was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and i have issues with being shy. also they both know i am a very sensitive person and they make it sound like i just wont be able to handle the death, and the heartbreaking stories i will hear as a nurse. they think my love for children will make it even harder for me. they say im gonna have to completly change if i want to do this career, which i understand- but i don't think i have to change in a bad way right? im so sensitive that books make me cry, movies make me genuinly scared, and sad movies make me cry...i guess it's hard for me to remind myself it's not real.
i keep telling myself, that i have met many nurses who are kind and gentle. that i don't have to turn cold and callus to become a nurse. but...if you read this far- i thank you and could you please let me know from your own experience what you think about my situation? are my family right to disuade me from nursing? even if i think it's the best choice? what kind of problems do you forsee me encounering that i might not have already thought of? and can you issue any advice to me at all on this predicament. thank you so much for your replies in advance. i hope it can cheer me up, or make me see the light.
there are many areas of nursing you can go into that can cut downon the death and horrific stories. school nursing, dr. office nursing, employee health, assisted living, to some degree home health, etc... you may have to stick out a year or two in a hospital setting, but after that if you find it too hard emotionally, there are other fields to get into.
Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.
As others have suggested get a treatment plan going for your social anxiety....And seek out some supportive relationships-like here on this board.I wonder what your loved one's motives are? Boyfriend/husbands can undermine our plans out of insecurity,jealousy,etc.You mom is just concerned for her baby...Ask her for her support...My mom was great-she helped me keep my car on the road an a roof over my head until I graduated and I only had to work part time during the school year (afterwards she did tell me that she was surprised I actually stuck it out because my life pattern up to then had been to never finish anything I started...I'm glad she did not tell me that :trout: at the start) If you want to be a nurse then do it! You know what is in your heart...
Boy do I know where you are coming from because I too, have been there myself. That's why, five years after deciding I wanted to pursue nursing as a career, I still haven't enrolled in the program.
My family have always been nay-sayers, and they tell me I am too sensitive to handle a career as a nurse. I always believed that kindness and caring were good attributes, but because I cared so much about their thoughts and opinions, I let it derail me from going for my dreams.
The absolute best piece of advice I can give you is to let go of what others think and concentrate on what you know, what you think, and what you feel. I am finally there after all these years because I opened up my eyes and realized that my family are never going to change. They are always going to have their objections and it really isn't my responsibility to overcome them. Instead, my responsibility is to myself and the mission I have here on earth. If I believe I am to be a nurse, I would be doing everyone a disservice by not being a nurse.
So go for your dreams. Follow your heart. It is my experience that people will lead you wrong. So be stronger than them and their objections. Be firm in your goals, and even if it is hard to know that there are nay-sayers, learn to care more about what you want. Your friends and family might not see this, but your future patients will certainly appreciate your sensitivity during their time of need. :)
Good luck. I think you'll be one of the best nurses out there. Let your passionate heart drive you...
A lot of great posts here, and so true. I also regret not going to college right out of high school, when life was just a bit simpler. I'm now 47 and taking my general courses, hoping to get in to a nursing program. Since I was a small child, I wanted to be a nurse. Family implied I wasn't "smart enough" and other off the wall suggestions to derail me. Life went on and other things take up your time as you get older and it becomes more difficult through other obligations (although do-able) to get in to the college scene.
I had always been very shy, but worked in a veterinary clinic for 4 years, and through that time learned to be more comfortable around people just by doing it. I also have anxiety disorders and take Lexapro for that, which helps a lot.
I have to agree with the other posters who ask the question of what the motives are behind your relatives trying to disuade you from being a nurse.
You really should do what is in YOUR heart, and although it might not be easy, every thing else will fall in to place for you.
When I first went into the nursing field, my family, my husbands family and all my frientds told me I would never be able to handle it My husband was the only one who backed me up and said if it was something I really wanted, then I would succeed. Everyone else said I was too tender hearted and wounldn't survive. I am still very tender hearted and cry at the drop of a hat, but I am a very good, kind and caring nurse. There are times that it is very rough, but in my opinion, so is everything in life at some point or another. Often times coworkers will laugh and say don't tell her (meaning me) that story or she'll be bawling...lol. I think you can do it if it is something you really want.
Kudos for doing what you feel is the right thing for you ! you shouldn't let anyone, no matter how close they are to you tell you how you should live your life, and this sounds like a lifelong dream!
Any one that knows me knows that I am over sensitive! I cry when I read books, I cry at movies, my brother can look at me a certian way and I cry! I cry at church, I cry at least 2 times a week when I drop my daughter off at school. So I am very extreme, But as a nurse(10 yrs.) I can tell you that I have cried over the deaths, at the time and later, as well as births! A co worker can rub me the wrong way and i can cry. my advice is to follow your dream, do the best you can, you sound like you are nurse material! Sensitive and being a crier are not always a bad thing, it can be an outlet to get rid of stress as well.
), it wont matter if you are shy, passive, or a cry baby, when you're taking care of someone, all they want to know is that you are capable and compassionate, and you seem like you are-so follow your own mind, and hopefully your family and friends will support you!
Quailfeathers
72 Posts
I agree with a lot of the previous posts; this is YOUR life and it's up to YOU to decide what you want to achieve. A good nurse, in my opinion, possesses compassion, which I define as the preception/knowledge the we are all connected to one another, that we need to be sensitive to the needs of those around us b/c those needs are the same as our needs.
I'm 52 and have raised a family on my own and was just recently able to enroll in nursing school. It hasn't been a life long goal like yours, however, I can't image a more fulfilling career path. We all make choices and each choice brings us closer finding our purpose and happiness in life. Listen to the voice inside of you, don't allow outside influences redirect you based on THEIR judgement of who you are. Who you are is what YOU believe.
Check out a plan with your doctor so it's already in place before the disorder flares. Half the battle is recognizing what needs to be handled. And remember that you're not going to be thrown into situations without the skill and knowledge to handle it, you're going to be taught a process that you can rely upon. For all you know, this might be the path that helps relieve some of the s/s of the disorder b/c it will teach you to be confident in your true Self. Education is never wasted even if you discover you nursing is not for you. The process will lead you closer to what you are meant to do. Have faith and take that leap with confidence that no matter what happens you'll be able to handle the situation.